Mincing Words

It seems that many moms (especially in Utah) create these bizarre phrases as expletives instead of actually cussing:

Oh, my heck!

Oh, my Hannah! (who’s Hannah?)

Other than grating on my ever-last nerve, these replacements only magnify the words they are so desperately trying not to say.

And I see on social media: OMGosh or OMGoodness instead of the standard OMG acronym.

Does it make any difference?

Are you holier for not actually saying it?

It’s legalistic language. It doesn’t matter, yet it does sometimes.

My favorite is a comic skit by Tim Hawkins, who requested alternatives to cursing and our favorite from the movie Three Amigos is: Son of a Motherless Goat.

Some words are very necessary but our society says they are embarrassing or ugly. We should not be ashamed to name our body parts and functions with the correct words instead of silly slang or babyish words. It’s important to know and be aware what is happening in our bodies, to be able to express and explain. It reduces the stigma around our bodies, functions, and its parts that should be private, but never secrets. How we speak to medical professionals, our spouses, our children about our bodies is important.

Words are SO important. As a writer, teacher, mom, I use words all the time and I want them to be loving words, uplifting, never tearing down or idle.

But I say to you that for every idle word men may speak, they will give account of it in the day of judgment. Matthew 12:36 NKJV

I once heard a sermon on mincing words and it made me really think about what we say in our most emotional moments.

What we put in our hearts comes out.

Whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things. Philippians 4:8 ESV

We train our children to say what they mean and mean what they say.

But let your ‘Yes’ be ‘Yes,’ and your ‘No,’ ‘No.’ For whatever is more than these is from the evil one. Matthew 5:37 NKJV

My preschooler Alex watches Spiderman and Batman and Transformers cartoons on Netflix on his iPad, and he always glances up at me in horror and informs me, “Mama, we don’t say [stupid, idiot, shut up, etc.]!

I love that my kids are that sensitive to language and they are careful with their words. And we also need to practice being loving with our tone when we speak.

Words can hurt or heal.

The tongue has the power of life and death, and those who love it will eat its fruit. Proverbs 18:21 NIV

We don’t say “Oh, my goodness.” 

“Why do you call me good?” Jesus asked. “Only God is truly good.” Mark 10:18 NLT

The Bible tells us that we should not say the Lord’s names in vain. We shouldn’t use the names of God irreverently.

God knows when we’re praying, so we don’t feel the need to repeat ourselves dozens of times, saying “Oh, God, Jesus…” as filler.

When we say, “Oh, my God!” isn’t that a form of prayer?

You must not misuse the name of the Lord your God. The Lord will not let you go unpunished if you misuse his name. Exodus 20:7 NLT

I teach my kids speaking skills. I encourage them to slow down and enunciate clearly and use good words to convey what they need to say. We are storytellers.

Expletives are vulgar language and they are. “Vulgar” means “common.”

I don’t want my family to be common.

I’m raising royalty.

When my teens want to feel big and bad and try out ugly words, I let them in the comfort of home and with their friends, but I teach them how to code switch in front of others and when it may not be appropriate, when they should be more careful or how they speak.

Many people have problems with certain words and foul language, just like with piercings and tattoos.

It’s one thing to say a word, it’s another thing to direct that word at someone.

It’s about respect.