What is valor?
The Free Dictionary states the definition of VALOR is:
Courage and boldness, as in battle; bravery.
Boldness or determination in facing danger.
Don’t you want your children to be courageous, bold, determined?
But to further the kingdom of Christ, not when you tell them to empty the dishwasher, right?
How do you teach your kids the difference?
It’s a delicate balance. Different personalities have to be taught these concepts…differently. My husband likes to say we have four kids with five different personalities. Our job is stressful and we sometimes struggle to raise these babes well.
My eldest is stubborn and fights everything we ask of her. I persevere and know that someday it will click with her and she will be an amazing leader. For her personality, I need to help her learn to tone it down, rein it in, not be bossy or mean. I hope and pray that nothing terrible happens to get the concept through her thick skull! She’s a natural leader, but she tends to be domineering. Her intelligence hinders her heart learning.
My son and second daughter need to be encouraged the other way, to be bolder, more determined, not to give up too easily if it gets hard. They’re shy and fearful. For them, I pray they will be strengthened and use their quiet strength for good and help others and glorify Jesus. My son is already kind and gentle and puts others before himself. I am thankful to have such a sweet-hearted boy who will grow into a man sensitive to others’ needs. My daughter, Tori, firmly desires fairness and equality and I know those ideals will serve her well in her future.
And then, there’s my Kate. I am fascinated by this free spirit who has never cared what the world thinks and I long to be more like her. I long to get dressed in whatever feels good, no matter if it matches by the standards of Milan or Paris. I long to be artistic and creative and in tune with my Maker and Nature and always hum a tune (sometimes quite loudly, to the chagrin of her siblings.) I watch her in awe, dreaming of the radical life she may lead for Christ. All I do is seek new experiences and education for her to explore so she can soak it up in her shining way. I know she’s a leader and she’s bold and strong. I want to be like her.
As parents, raising servant leaders requires constant tweaking, personalization, strategies and tactics. It is warfare. Spiritual warfare. Work with strengths and encourage to overcome weaknesses without frustration.
My job is not to protect my kids from failure, but to help them find their way to success sooner than I did. {Tweet that!}
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