One of the last times I attended church, I was dismayed by one of the deacons/elders proudly exclaiming that he gave lots of money to charities and that was all he was required and convicted to do as a Christian. He went on to say that Jesus wasn’t political and citizenship didn’t require any more of him than his comfortable middle class life allowed.
I stared at him with my mouth open. Nothing I could think of to say mattered or would change his mind.
I realize this attitude is common in the church. No one wants to get his hands dirty or actually work for justice. They don’t even realize injustice exists since they are protected in their privileged lives. Some people seem to think that injustice is just something in movies or made up for sensationalism in the news. It doesn’t affect them in any way. They shake their heads at people who somehow cause their own problems instead of seeing the systematic injustices for what they are.
That has been pretty much the mindset of most people I’ve known in church and we just don’t attend church anymore. It still hurt to hear it said out loud, in front of the pastor and their family.
The last few years have been hard.
The news has been awful.
We are living in a time of continuous war, pandemic, an attempted coup, domestic violence, racism, and child abuse.
Most people just shake their heads and nothing affects them. They are desensitized. They are untouched.
Yes, some are simply surviving. Many have taken a financial downturn or have health issues and it’s reasonable to take some time to cocoon and rest and hopefully emerge triumphant later.
But there’s almost always something we can do to improve the world we live in.
What can we do?
What bothers you?
It’s easy to be a social media warrior or armchair activist. Too many want to be performative in their charitable activities, taking selfies while donating or providing a service.
If you’re not angry, you’re not paying attention.
Sit and seethe and learn from your feelings, especially the feelings deemed wrong or negative by caregivers and authority figures when we were growing up.
Ask questions of your soul about how your religion alienates and ostracizes others who might look or live or pray differently than you do.
What do you think needs to change?
Where does your heart, passion, talent lie?
What can I do where I am?
Learn
Read, read, read. Find book lists of authors of color, LGBTQA+, those who survived poverty, mental illness, or war, anyone different than you. Internalize their struggle and experiences. Realize your privilege.
Follow people different than you on social media and watch, read, listen. Don’t feel the need to comment in outrage, sadness, or solidarity. That is not for you.
Start making friends with people who look or live differently than you do.
Volunteer
There are lots of opportunities for volunteering. You can start small. Give an hour. Let your children help or see you.
There are lots of needs in our parks and public communities, schools, libraries, women’s centers, shelters for the unhoused, your workplace.
Look at the organization’s purpose and vision to determine if it fits your beliefs and values.
Protest
Join a peaceful protest in your community, city, school, or workplace.
Yes, there could be potential consequences. Plan accordingly.
What are you willing to risk?
Get Involved
Learn about how local, state, and federal government decisions affect you and your children and neighbors.
Be a concerned citizen.
Attend community and city meetings.
Vote.
Write to local leaders.
Write to your Congress people.
You don’t get to complain for not knowing the facts or not making a difference.
Donate
Yes, it’s good to donate, but do so mindfully and intelligently.
Look at the organization and make sure the people they claim to help actually receive the assistance they need and not so much the CEOs making the big bucks.
Also, look at where you use your money and why. Spend more wisely. There are lots of great companies that have better products and pay better wages to their employees and treat their customers and employees better than the huge conglomerates where you’re just a number. We use the Buycott app to choose better products when we’re shopping. We can slowly change our habits to get better sourced chocolate and coffee, more sustainable clothing and cleaning supplies.
What will you do?
There’s a lot we can do other than doomscrolling and lamenting the state of the country and world.
We can begin by being mindful where we spend our money and how we spend our time. We can learn about the world and how we can improve conditions for everyone.
We live in the dumbest dystopia where people on social media are casting movies about wars while they are taking place. I am tired of fragile white men cry about beer and wanting to continue to abuse women and revel in their toxicity.
It’s frustrating that most of our news comes from companies owned by billionaires who just want to rule the world and have all the power with none of the responsibility.
Linking up: A Pinch of Joy, House on Silverado, Grammy’s Grid, April Harris, Anita Ojeda, Random Musings, Uncommon Surburbia, Mostly Blogging, Create with Joy, Eclectic Red Barn, Stroll Thru Life, Shelbee on the Edge, LouLou Girls, God’s Growing Garden, InstaEncouragements, Jeanne Takenaka, Jenerally Informed, Anchored Abode, Ridge Haven Homestead, Ducks in a Row, Fluster Buster, Imparting Grace, Slices of Life, Artful Mom, Try it Like it, Good Random Fun, LEO Wife, Simply Beautiful, Modern Monticello, Answer is Chocolate, Bijou Life, Lauren Sparks, CWJ, Pieced Pastimes, Momfessionals, OMHG,
I’m sorry to hear that you had a negative experience at church, Jennifer. Churches are made up of imperfect people, but not all churches are alike – some are motivated by love and gladly serve their community. I’m glad you have found some volunteer organizations to serve with in your community, and I hope it is a good experience for you. I do think love is a better heart place than anger – for empathy, giving, serving, etc.
Great post, Jennifer! I’ve been disappointed in many attitudes I’ve seen in several churches around me too. Jesus was such a radical in his day and has called us to be the same. There are so many injustices around us that I think Jesus would want us to fight against. If we aren’t willing to acknowledge them and try to change them, we’re missing out on multiple opportunities to love the world. And also setting a bad example of Christianity. :(
Hi Jennifer,
It’s painful and disturbing to hear ill-spoken words pour from the mouths of our leaders. A pastor I once knew said, “If you aren’t offended at church, just wait.” I think he was right. The church is full of sinners–just like me.
I can understand why you decided to leave a church that conflicts deeply with your core values. At the same time, scripture tells us not to “give up meeting together”. Many others in the church–even conservative evangelicals like me–care deeply about the abused, maltreated, and overlooked.
I hope you can find a group of fellow believers who will encourage you in your faith as you continue to live out your passion. It’s clear you serve with a heart of love toward others.
Thanks for linking up!
Blessings,
Tammy
It is not church that offends me. It is not sinners who offend me. It is the church members who knowingly abuse and exclude and spout hatred and accuse and belittle and use scripture to ridicule and humiliate others. Too many American churches just want their confirmation bias that they can hate together and call it love while their white colonialist Jesus approves. They don’t want questions or dialogue. Many who say they care only do with lip service while never ever getting uncomfortable or doing anything worthwhile to help. So many admonish me that scripture says I shouldn’t give up on church. Well, the church has sure given up on me, but I’m the real problem, ok. I will not continue to see my family used and abused.
This is such a thought-provoking and challenging post, Jennifer. I am so glad you shared it. We all need to be the change we want to see in the world, and we have to take action to make that happen. You’ve shared some excellent ideas to help us all do that. Thank you so much for being a part of Hearth and Soul.