Maybe not enough years ago…I realized I don’t have to participate.

How many decisions about life, job, health, or children are we making out of peer or family pressure? We can model the change we want for ourselves and for our children to see.

There is no village and I don’t want to be a part of the mom society I see online and in our community.

The only point to therapy other than trauma processing is to learn how to acclimate to our sick society. I tried several times and it was always disappointing. I shouldn’t have to be medicated to succeed. Perhaps our society’s values should change?

I don’t have to view advertisements and I sure don’t have to purchase items or services. We are a capitalist consumer society but I don’t have to consume. It’s not a competition.

I don’t have to read blogs or articles or news reports. It’s getting harder to discern what is even real anymore.

I don’t have to care about having an aesthetic or brands or labels.

I don’t care about what’s popular or trendy. I didn’t care when I was seventeen, but I was ostracized and alienated so I tried to periodically fit in and then wondered why I got so depressed. I feel more myself now that I’ve given up on keeping up.

I can remove all expectations that society places on me as a woman and wife and mother.

I lurk in online groups for mothers and military spouses and homeschoolers. It is depressing how many questions there are in these anonymous settings about how to keep up with this rat race society instead of slowing down and being original or fighting oppression. I’ve had posts deleted that don’t align with their worldview the admins claimed were “unkind.” I feel like an anthropologist. They just crave confirmation bias. Don’t we all? But no one is fighting against abuse and control. OMG so many of these moms seem like they hate their kids.

I have snoozed every single company or profile in my FB feed wanting to laminate my brows, extend my lashes, inject or fill my face, remove my blemishes, blonde my hair, clean my house, detail my car, vacuum my air ducts, steam my carpet, clear my yard, pressure wash my driveway, or offering cottage baked goods. It’s excessive how many side hustles there are and I wonder how many are even legit companies and I see a lot of scam complaints. It’s sad that people have to do this to try to survive financially.

I deleted my Twitter with the new TOS about AI with no options. I really don’t utilize social media the way many of my peers, family members, or acquaintances do. I don’t post many pictures of my family or selfies. I don’t like bragging or fishing for engagement. I seldom crowdsource because I don’t need that kind of affirmation. I am only on Facebook to keep up with my cousins. I have 41 “friends” who consist of relatives by blood and marriage, my daughter’s roommates, past students, and ten actual IRL friends. I follow a few pages of organizations I like. I’m considering deleting Instagram, because it’s worthless since it’s just reels and screenshots. It seems that many parents don’t see the irony of using their smartphones, tablets, social media while ridiculing their kids and teens for the exact same thing. Many youths really don’t use social media the same way adults do and that’s fine. Forbidding it or limiting it or using it as a punishment tool will backfire.

I can decorate my house however I want to with no guilt or pressure from an aesthetic look or sad beige club. I don’t want my house to look like a dentist office. I like retro decor for memories and antique well-made items instead of the “fast fashion decor garbage.” I saw someone say they didn’t want dirty old things in their house and I feel sad for her in her sterile house. Why are all these dinner reels just empty kitchens with two utensils and four neutral dog dishes to feed her little Stepford family?

I don’t have to have the newest or latest technology. I reluctantly have one television in our basement and all the stupid streaming services. We have a Wii and Switch. Everyone in my little family has an iPad and smartphone. We have computers. I don’t see the need to upgrade every year.

I don’t shop in stores or online for entertainment. I actually hate shopping. But I’ve also never used a meal or grocery delivery or Doordash or the like. I like thrifting and antique malls.

I don’t do brunch. I’m not a morning person and I have absolutely no desire to wake up and get dressed and go out in public and deal with people while uncaffeinated. I don’t even eat out, except very, very rarely, and only at like two or three places. I have a well-stocked pantry, freezer, and bar so I cook breakfast and dinner every single day and I make my own drinks. My kids have packed lunches during their classes at a local university. I don’t think I know anyone who actually cooks real food. They’re too busy or it’s not worth the effort or some such excuse.

I think people get offended when we aren’t ashamed of things that they were taught to be ashamed of and they resent us for not caring what everybody thinks.

I don’t have to be a puppet of capitalism or whatever society says I should be or do.

I feel at peace being unplugged.