Jennifer Lambert

A Sacred Balance

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Homeschool High School

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April 22, 2015 By Jennifer Lambert 1 Comment

I stressed over the transition from middle school to high school. I worried my daughter would get “behind” in her studies. We struggled with schedules and checklists and planners and keeping up with the lessons.

I did her a disservice the last couple years with review items and I should have listened to my gut and let her be to complete the core four: science, math, history, and literature. She got bogged down and overwhelmed with all I expected her to do. And I cannot live vicariously through her with the education I would have wanted.

What Can Homeschool High School Look Like

I realize she is so much more successful if I just back off.

We still have curriculum: books and a schedule to complete. I discussed how I would like her to cram it all in the next couple months but she’s not interested. If she wants to “waste” her summer, so be it.

The awesome thing?

She’s been learning so much.

I must keep an active, safe conversation flowing.

I listen to her rattle on and on and on about her play rehearsals and what he said at CAP or what she learned about lab science that day.

It can be tiresome but I give her my undivided attention. I must make sure she feels important. Otherwise, she will clam up and there will be no relationship there. I am trying to maintain attachment before she feels that peers are more important than family.

What can homeschool high school look like?

Civil Air Patrol

Liz is currently a C/MSgt.

So proud that Liz received the Air Force Sergeants Association Award for Cadet Leadership!

Leadership Award
Formal

Several CAP cadets are also members of JROTC and Liz was invited to the JROTC Ball.

Drama

Liz was AMAZING in the play Kindertransport with KMC Onstage. She won an award.

Eva saying bye to Mutti

Science

Liz earned first place at our little homeschool science fair.

She worked really, really hard on it and actually did all the research and data and analysis in the medical laboratory.

Science Fair Project

She learns well this way and applies what she reads in her books.

We had loads of fun at an eclipse party with these fun glasses!

Eclipse Party

Literature

We love to read and watch the films based on the books we read. We go to the library weekly and use Netflix and Amazon to view movies.

I am currently thrilled to be reading through some of my favorite books that I read and used to teach to my students.

Sometimes, we just read the book and don’t do massive amounts of analysis and work. Sometimes, I have her narrate orally to me what she learned. We like Venn diagrams and notebooking. We’re working up to a couple literary analysis essays in the next couple months.

I don’t force grammar studies or formal writing. We get lots of grammar learning with Latin and foreign language. Liz is a natural writer with all the reading she does and when I work closely with her, I know which areas need improvement.

Much of our literature reading corresponds to our history studies.

We recently visited the Anne Frank House in Amsterdam.

Anne Frank House

History

We’ve been traveling and learning about events and culture to tie in with our history studies.

It’s such a wonderful opportunity to live in Europe and see all the cultural and historical sites.

Liz is on the E in Amsterdam outside the Rijksmuseum.

Amsterdam

There we all are!

I am Amsterdam

Art

We love to read about our favorite artists and attempt to recreate something in that style…

but to actually see the originals?

We love the d’Orsay and the van Gogh Museum.

Alex was also thrilled to see his boats from his favorite art game – Art Ditto.

Admiring van Gogh

We enjoyed the artistic flower sculpture and displays at Keukenhof.

Flowers as Art

Math

Liz is slowly completing the algebra program with VideoText.

We plan to log in her activities in a portfolio to make transcripts easier.

It’s been an uphill battle with homeschooling and parenting the last couple years but things are settling down well and I’m seeing the fruits of her labor and I am so proud of her.

I look forward to seeing greatness during high school years. Liz is a social butterfly and unafraid to try new things and I pray for wonderful learning opportunities in her future. Dual credit is a great option for many students. Look into your state and local colleges for more information!

High School Homeschool:

  • Graduating Homeschool High School
  • Health Credit
  • Transcripts and Credits
  • Homeschool Planner Printables
  • Civil Air Patrol as Elective
  • Homeschool Electives
  • How we do History
  • I Don’t Teach English
  • How we do Math
  • Foreign Language
  • How we do Science
  • Preparing for After High School
  • 5 Best Life Skills Books for Teens
The #1 Writing Tool
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Filed Under: Homeschool Tagged With: back to school, curriculum, high school, homeschool, teen

Humility in a Bottle

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March 12, 2015 By Jennifer Lambert Leave a Comment

My teen daughter probably would be labeled all sorts of letters if she attended school.

We prefer to manage any potential issues without medication. Many behavior issues can be fixed with proper nutrition.

She is often difficult when she wants to be.  Most days, we get along well — with only a few squinty stares as she weighs a decision whether to obey or fight.

What Does Stubborn Look Like?

I often struggle to successfully motivate and teach her while remaining unemotional and objective. I do know that she sometimes feels triumphant when I lose it over not being able to “control” her. She knows how to push all the buttons.

She is stubborn. Like, sit at the table for three hours, staring at one math page, refusing to pick up a pencil, stubborn.

Nothing we say or do seems to matter at these times.

Changing Behavior

My husband gets increasingly frustrated with not making any progress in prompting her to cooperate.

He finally turned to our oil table on a particularly difficult Saturday morning when we had hoped to have her quickly complete some school work before we all head outdoors for some fun. And she decided to be stubborn.

We had just ordered a Potential blend in our monthly essential oil shipment. We had purchased a Humble blend after testing it and liking it – and and we had used it before with great success.

He took both those bottles and dripped some of each into his palm and anointed her head.

Humble Blend + Potential Blend + Progesterone =Humility in a Bottle

Obedience in a Bottle | https://www.jenniferalambert.com/

While we don’t prescribe to blind obedience in our parenting methods, we do sometimes have to take more drastic measures to communicate to our children our desires, or override their potential poor choices. We have to coach and teach and model self-control. When stubbornness and stand-offs occur, we often take a step back to evaluate our attitudes. Sometimes, we look to natural methods like diffusing essential oils or massage to help ease the situation.

“Obedience is doing what you’re told, no matter what’s right. Morality is doing what’s right, no matter what you’re told.” L.R.Knost

The Effects

Within a few minutes, she had gotten dressed, become amazingly more agreeable, and was working diligently on her math assignment.

We stood back in awe.

She completed her math more cheerfully than ever before. The rest of the day, she was compliant and good-natured.

It was really weird, y’all.

Natural Progesterone

For several months, we have encouraged her to use a natural, plant-based Progesterone before bed. Our daughter does not use this regularly. We understand that hormone therapy is very sensitive stuff. She uses only a drop or two a few evenings each month.

The Progesterone has helped to maintain balance with her fluctuating hormones. We saw improvement in her mood steadily with essential oil use. Super helpful during this tumultuous time of being a fourteen-year-old girl!

I also like to use the Progesterone in the evenings. 

We also got labs completed to rule out any physical issues. Her vitamin D and iron levels were extremely low. Her cortisol levels were also very low, but the doctors assure us she will grow out of that. We upped the supplements and changed her diet to more natural with lots of vitamin B rich foods. We also got a happy funshine lamp. Within a few months, her mood is much more even and she doesn’t feel so tired anymore. The endocrinologist visits were very helpful to rule out any issues, problems, and set our minds at ease. We all eat whole foods, so diet is not really an issue.

We do not recommend treating hormones without professional guidance.

My husband and I are quite amazed by how quickly the oils help us with all sorts of situations. While we use the oils frequently and for various reasons, we are constantly surprised by new methods and successes.

Why did these particular essential oils help with compliance?

We Need to Learn Humility

What is in the Humble essential oil blend?

  • Rosewood (Aniba rosaeodora)
  • Ylang Ylang (Cananga odorata)
  • Geranium (Pelargonium graveolens)
  • Melissa (Melissa officinalis)
  • Frankincense (Boswellia carteri)
  • Spikenard (Nardostachys jatamansi)
  • Myrrh (Commiphora myrrha)
  • Rose (Rosa damascena)
  • Neroli (Citrus aurantium)

If My people, who are called by My name, shall humble themselves, pray, seek, crave, and require of necessity My face and turn from their wicked ways, then will I hear from heaven, forgive their sin, and heal their land. 2 Chronicles 7:14 AMP

We Need to Reach Our Potential

What will you find in the Potential essential oil blend?

  • Cypress (Callitrus intratropica)
  • Ylang ylang (Cananga odorata)
  • Cedarwood (Cedrus atlantica)
  • Tansy (Tanacetum annuum)
  • Fir (Abies concolor)
  • Galbanum (Ferula gummosa)
  • Frankincense (Boswellia carteri)
  • Sandalwood (Santalum album)
  • Lavender (Lavandula angustifolia)
  • Cinnamon (Cinnamomum verum)
  • Rose (Rosa damascena)
  • Spruce (Picea mariana)
  • Geranium (Pelargonium graveolens)
  • Jasmine (jasminum officinale)

Essential Oils as Effective Parenting Tools

These essential oils (among many others!) are great parenting tools.

We hesitate to use the word obedience, but sometimes, we do want to firmly guide kids in a certain direction while keeping communication open and modeling self-control. I have more life experience than a child, tween, teen, young adult. I’ve been there and realize the consequences that could follow their actions. Sometimes, it’s good for them to experience the consequences. I don’t want to save them from learning experiences, but I do want a teachable spirit.

We encourage our children to work through their flesh natures and to practice better behaviors, to develop self-control. We pray and discuss the behaviors that honor God and others. The behaviors that we desire them to exhibit as they grow up into adulthood. We don’t use rewards or punishments. We expect intrinsic motivation. We teach empathy.

Essential oils are great tools to help us encourage the desired character we want exhibited in our children. I love that we can use oils, combined with nutrition, supplements, and prayer, to help us achieve our family goals.

We focus on respectful parenting. We don’t use punishments and rewards. We don’t bully, coerce, or physically restrain our kids. We use our words calmly and reason with our children about expectations, needs, and desires. We listen. We explain. We teach and coach. There are occasional battles of wills and it’s not about winning. It’s about communication and relationship. Love is more important than getting one’s way. We have to shift our focus and figure out what’s really important. Some issues are non-negotiable.

Check out my favorite resources here!

Also see my Parenting and Leadership Pinterest boards.

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Filed Under: Essential Oils Tagged With: essential oils, parenting, teen

Homeschool Planner

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January 7, 2015 By Jennifer Lambert 12 Comments

The kids are finishing up curriculum and January is typically when we evaluate our successes and whether we need a change.

We tend to follow a calendar year rather than a fiscal or traditional school year.

I realize that my teen needs some direction for time management and must learn to keep a time budget for herself so she can stay on track with her school assignments and not get further behind.

I have some great planning printables on my Pinterest board, but I realize that some of them aren’t exactly what we need.

There are some great calendars and planners for sale all over the Internet but they’re not exactly what we need either and I’ve been so disappointed when I’ve purchased them in the past and they didn’t work well for us.

We made our own student planner.

Here’s what we found and put together for the perfect planner.

A pretty cover.

We love this neato zebra cover page that’s just perfect (she has oodles to choose from).

Goal-setting pages.

Since I’m raising servant leaders, we need goals. I love these free printable goal-planning pages.

I plan to take some time after our holiday to discuss goals with my kids. She can have these planning pages to refer to throughout the year and make sure she stays on track. I think this would be a great motivational tool so she will complete her work.

Calendar pages.

I love the colors for these monthly calendar pages! 

And I printed some pretty weekly planning pages to help Liz keep track of her school and extracurricular schedule. I saved them ages ago and have no idea where I got them.

Assignments pages.

I designed some weekly assignment planning pages of our own. There are some really beautiful pages out there, but I need simple, lots of room to write in assignments, checklists, and no bells or whistles to distract. Download our simple student pages below.

As we complete her planner and get all the pages printed for the rest of the year, I will comb bind it and help her fill it out and coach her to keep track every day.

What I’m not including:

  • cutesy journal pages
  • artsy freestyle pages
  • Bible study journals

I saw oodles of these pretty pages to print, but I just know it would end in disaster if I included these in this planner. They would distract the girls and take the focus off time management. They would waste lots of time playing with filling in the blanks and doodling rather than completing and checking off appointments and assignments.

I have an art journal and a great Bible study for teen girls as part of regular homeschool work.

I pray that this pretty new planner will help Liz with time management this year!

I also like this blog planner for me.

The #1 Writing Tool

Subscribe to the blog and download our student planning pages:

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Filed Under: Homeschool Tagged With: back to school, calendar, high school, planner, teen, time management

Shepherding Teens

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August 25, 2014 By Jennifer Lambert Leave a Comment

When I was pregnant with our third child, my husband asked me in bewilderment, “How will we do bedtime?”

At the time it seemed to me a ridiculously silly question.

“We’ll just do it,” I thought, exasperated.

As parents, we sometimes do what we must to survive.

I soon realized that having more than one child was hard. I envied the families with only children. I also had no idea how large families did anything well.

And I’ve never considered ours a large family.

Until we moved to Germany.

We stood out in Europe among the families of single kids or perfect pairs. The parents aren’t outnumbered. They can drive small cars with four seats. They don’t have to wait forever at restaurants to be seated. They’re mathematically correct.

With a thirteen-year-old, eight-year-old, seven-year-old, and four-year-old, it seemed like a legitimate concern. How do I do bedtime well? How do I divide my time and mothering well?

A few harried years went by with rushed bedtimes. Rushed baths. Rushed prayers. Rushed affection. Exhausted, ready to be done with the day, and still facing the destruction of a kitchen well-used every night.

I traded a relationship with my children at bedtime for me time.

The eldest child often went unheeded as I rocked the baby and Dad prayed with the girls. Night after night. Not every night, but too many. I dreaded the never-ending chores of cleaning up and just wanted to collapse into writing or reading or sleep.

Teens are just as needy as toddlers.

Perhaps needier.

I missed out on many bedtime conversations and prayers and opportunities for heart training and answering difficult questions.

Because I was exhausted.

Or thought I was.

I’d read all the right books (and many wrong ones!) about parenting, shepherding and training hearts, but all those words won’t substitute for the proactive parent relationship a child needs.

It took near disaster to wake us up to how much we are needed as the parents of a teen. To pray for the reversal of damage. To pray for redemption of time and the experiences that we missed. To pray for improvement in our family relationships.

We were living on the surface.

We lived superficially instead of getting at the marrow of life. We were in the wings, instead of actively directing and counseling. We were focused on all the wrong things.

Every day was an uphill battle as defiance reigned and I was ready to just give up.

I almost lost her.

Then a not-so-gentle nudge from God.

Pray.

I’m not a prayer warrior. It’s not my nature. I wasn’t raised to this. We’re not a hymn-singing, Bible-quoting, tract-giving family. We don’t spend hours on Bible study or scripture reading every morning. Maybe we should do some things differently.

Such a simple thing, really–to pray earnestly for and with this child. This child so different from myself. Despite the hard days, the mean looks, the saucy attitude. This child whom I have seen withering away and growing cold and distant is now blossoming again with the nourishment of relationship she needs and now receives that she didn’t know how to ask for.

I know that God can redeem that lost time and restore this relationship. He is a God of reconciliation. He reminds me of the good memories we shared and the knowledge that we can make more good memories. I look forward to the future as it unfolds in excitement and anticipation and opportunity.

It’s not always a matter of good or bad parenting. Kids eventually make their own choices. They’re too often stuck in the middle. I can actively pray for and with my daughter and know it’s in God’s hands.

And I will love her no matter what.

As my other three kids grow up into teens and young adults, I pray fervently for each of them. I know they struggle to grow into their own individual selves and I have to hold them with open hands as they develop and make their mistakes and learn. They also watched their eldest sibling flounder and they learned from witnessing her mistakes and lessons.

I am so pleased to be through this stage with my eldest and it seems smoother with my other three. Perhaps I learned so much that I am less anxious and realize my place and that I can’t live vicariously through my children and they must learn with their own ups and downs.

I will always be here to catch them if and when they fall.

Resources:

  • Jesus, the Gentle Parent: Gentle Christian Parenting by L.R. Knost 
  • Hold On to Your Kids: Why Parents Need to Matter More Than Peers by Gordon Neufeld and Gabor Maté  
  • Untangled: Guiding Teenage Girls Through the Seven Transitions into Adulthood by Lisa Damour, Ph.D. 
  • Hands Free Mama: A Guide to Putting Down the Phone, Burning the To-Do List, and Letting Go of Perfection to Grasp What Really Matters! by Rachel Macy Stafford  
  • Unconditional Parenting: Moving from Rewards and Punishments to Love and Reason by Alfie Kohn 
  • Free to Learn: Why Unleashing the Instinct to Play Will Make Our Children Happier, More Self-Reliant, and Better Students for Life by Peter Gray 
  • The Danish Way of Parenting: What the Happiest People in the World Know About Raising Confident, Capable Kids by Jessica Joelle Alexander  

You might also like:

  • The Dirty Dozen Apps
  • Teaching Self-Control
  • Teaching Kindness
  • Teaching Diversity
  • 5 Best Books for Teen Life Skills
  • Graduating from Homeschool
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I Almost Lost Her

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June 11, 2014 By Jennifer Lambert 8 Comments

We all know the tween years are tough.

It doesn’t matter the kind of school: public, private, homeschool.

It’s hard with the pressures from the outside and the changes on the inside.

I feel like those were the lost years. Literally.

I am just now realizing how close I came to almost losing my daughter.

She’s thirteen and half now and I see my little girl peeking through again lately. She laughs and is silly and her eyes twinkle again. She’s growing up and she’s super smart and the past is now a fading shadow.

For several years, she was buried down deep.

She had rough beginnings, torn between two households every other weekend and most holidays. Then, being uprooted and traveling where the Air Force sends us, homeschooling, three siblings, more responsibility than she should have for one so young.

I relied too heavily on her as my support. She was more to me than just a mother’s helper. I had no one else but her.

Having three babies and no family or friends, I expected her to help more than she should. She was too willing and able and I am ever grateful to her, but I wish I could have those years back for her.

She lost part of her childhood.

She did her schooling very independently for a couple years. I was busy, busy, busy with a baby and two toddlers. She liked playing computer games. I was a lazy mother with her, thinking she was fine, that she was doing well. I was so stressed and barely hanging on.

We were in survival mode.

When I asked her about some things, she fought me and dug her heels in. She became quiet and aloof. She didn’t want to eat. She was irritable. She was depressed.

Her Latin assignments weren’t completed and most lessons were done poorly. We started over but then mostly she gave up. She got “fired” from piano class for not completing the lessons or practicing. She refused to complete science experiments. She lost interest in many things she used to love.

I didn’t know what was wrong or what to do.

No one tells you that those computer parenting controls and services often don’t monitor chats or instant messaging.

(At least the service we had then did nothing to block Yahoo Messenger.)

For her protection and privacy, I won’t go into details.

Two months can cause damage that lasts years.

The ripples affected too much.

Predators are everywhere and this is why our children have no social media and we very, very closely monitor email and all online activity. Computers stay in the main rooms with screens facing out so I can see – at all times. Emails are filtered through our accounts. My husband receives every single email and can preview them. Chat and messaging are disabled.

We always said it wouldn’t happen to us. We were so diligent. We checked histories and installed parental control programs. We had Internet contracts and talked openly about dangers online.

I almost lost her.

We didn’t go to counseling. We didn’t involve our church or the FBI. We probably handled the whole thing really poorly and made it worse. But I don’t think we overreacted. We put our electronics on lockdown. Settings are restricted and long complicated passwords block the kids from making changes on their iPads. We blocked YouTube completely.

God can and will redeem those lost months. I am gradually rebuilding my relationship with my daughter. She is reemerging a lovely young lady who delights in so much like she used to. She’s healing and moving on. We all are.

I love seeing my daughter again. I missed her so much.

We’re still in a battle for her soul. Please pray.

We are very concerned about G+ communities.  Just doing an innocent search of “teen” and up pops all sorts of porn communities where teens are sucked into an ugly, evil world. Too many apps have potential for misuse. And I don’t think it’s right to allow children under age 13 to have social media accounts. Who cares if their peers don’t think they’re cool?

Resources:

  • American Girls: Social Media and the Secret Lives of Teenagers by Nancy Jo Sales
  • Disconnected: Youth, New Media, and the Ethics Gap by Carrie James
  • Alone Together: Why We Expect More from Technology and Less from Each Other by Sherry Turkle
  • It’s Complicated: The Social Lives of Networked Teens by danah boyd
  • iGen: Why Today’s Super-Connected Kids Are Growing Up Less Rebellious, More Tolerant, Less Happy–and Completely Unprepared for Adulthood–and What That Means for the Rest of Us by Jean M. Twenge, PhD
  • The Anxious Generation: How the Great Rewiring of Childhood Is Causing an Epidemic of Mental Illness by Jonathan Haidt
  • Last Child in the Woods: Saving Our Children From Nature-Deficit by Richard Louv
  • Simplicity Parenting: Using the Extraordinary Power of Less to Raise Calmer, Happier, and More Secure Kids by Kim John Payne and Lisa M. Ross
  • Hands Free Life: Nine Habits for Overcoming Distraction, Living Better, and Loving More by Rachel Macy Stafford
  • Hands Free Mama: A Guide to Putting Down the Phone, Burning the To-Do List, and Letting Go of Perfection to Grasp What Really Matters! by Rachel Macy Stafford
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Filed Under: Family Tagged With: Internet, parenting, social media, technology, teen

31 Days of Servant Leadership: Youth Part 2

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October 10, 2013 By Jennifer Lambert Leave a Comment

Welcome back to 31 Days of Servant Leadership!

adolescent-myth-2.jpg

As leaders of our homes, as mothers, as teachers, we should not live in fear of our teenage children.

For God did not give us a spirit of timidity (of cowardice, of craven and cringing and fawning fear), but [He has given us a spirit] of power and of love and of calm and well-balanced mind and discipline and self-control. 2 Timothy 1:7 AMP

I stand on this verse as a promise from God for my relationship with my children.

I pray it over our family. I ain’t raising no cowards! I teach “with great power comes great responsibility.” Look at Spider-Man and also look at Jesus. Jesus knew He had All The Power. He knew He could wield it, but He didn’t. He was wise and knew there was a better Way. Spider-Man has lived through a gazillion comic books, TV shows, and movies – and he’s still letting his emotions get the best of him.

No excuses. It doesn’t matter how they feel or what their friends or acquaintances or celebrities do. We are commanded to honor our parents. And that doesn’t end at a certain age. All children must do it always.

“Honor your father and mother”—which is the first commandment with a promise— “so that it may go well with you and that you may enjoy long life on the earth.” Ephesians 6:2-3

Should we exasperate our children to get our way? To show them we’re right?

Of course not. If we want our children to be leaders, then it’s up to us to train them to be leaders.

Is your testimony an example to raising servant leaders? What kind of example do you set for your children? Because they’re watching and I think toddlers and teens watch more closely!

Do you slack off in some areas?

Do you drive with grace in your minivan? Do you listen to Godly music? Do you watch wholesome TV shows and movies?

I don’t care what you watch or listen to.

But your kids will ask why it’s ok for you to listen to Nine Inch Nails and watch Magic Mike and read 50 Shades of Grey, but she can’t.

If you have to hide from your kids to watch, listen, or read something, then maybe it’s not right.

Please explain that double standard to her (and to me.)

My kids convict me all the time. My daughter (who turns 13 MONDAY!) often asks me to change the radio station from country to Christian or classical. She doesn’t want to hear love songs and I am so proud of her.

I got to thinking the other night as I dropped Liz off at Civil Air Patrol. The sun was sinking into the road and I couldn’t see very clearly if there were cars coming. I waited until I was sure before pulling out of the parking lot to turn left into the sunset. I pulled into the center lane to merge into traffic. This mom pulled out behind me and whipped her SUV AROUND me and caused a car to swerve into the far left lane to avoid her. I watched her zoom past as she scowled at me. I pray she got where she was going.

How often do we rush headlong into this parenting thing with no goals, no plans, no direction? How often do we blame circumstances beyond our control rather than being proactive?

If we want respectful, helpful, loving teens, we need to begin when they’re babies. We need to train them to be that way, so there’s no alternative acceptable.

Not too long ago, there was no adolescence. It’s a new idea, after child work laws and mandated schooling were instituted. And became more common after WWII.

A pathological state of youth, heretofore unrecognized by history, was designed by G. Stanley Hall of Johns Hopkins University. He called it adolescence and debuted the condition in a huge two-volume study of that name, published in 1904. Trained in Prussia as behavioral psychologist Wilhelm Wundt’s first assistant, Hall (immensely influential in school circles at the beginning of the 20th century) identified adolescence as a dangerously irrational state of human growth requiring psychological controls inculcated through schooling.

Weapons of Mass Instruction by John Taylor Gatto

Before that, poor kids went to work as soon as they were able to contribute to the family and rich kids completed a classical education and took on responsibility and went to work. I’ve read many accounts of tweens and teens changing the world – commanding ships, navies, armies, religions, writing books, beginning movements,  revolutionizing math, composing music, creating art, inventing, shaping the world of science…many of our nation’s forefathers began their careers in the military, courtroom, or plantation when they were very young.

And the average American teen plays video games rather than being a radical world changer for Christ?

Read Part 1.

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Filed Under: Leadership Tagged With: high school, teen

31 Days of Servant Leadership: Youth Part 1

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Please see my suggested resources.

October 9, 2013 By Jennifer Lambert 14 Comments

Welcome back to 31 Days of Servant Leadership.

How do you encourage youth to be leaders?

adolescent-myth.jpg

I’m pretty disgusted by all the hype that it’s normal to have kids with that “tween/teen” angst and stinky attitude. It’s normal?!

It saddens me that Christians buy into this normality as well as everyone else.

I hear and read things like this all the time:

“She’s just going through a phase.”

“That’s just her age.”

“She’ll grow out of it.”

“Those hormones are just acting up.”

Why must it be normal?

It’s unacceptable to have an ungrateful, selfish, pouty, sinful attitude.

I won’t allow it in my home. I won’t allow my daughter to act that way anywhere.

I won’t allow it in a toddler, child, tween, teen, or adult. There is no excuse.

Parents compromise on too much.

If we don’t disciple our kids from babyhood to adulthood, who will?

The world.

And the world says it’s normal for tweens and teens to look like adults and act like adults. It’s normal to look out for #1, and have tantrums if she doesn’t get what she wants.

I say it’s not normal. My expectations for my kids are much higher than the norm. I expect them to behave and be respectful of others regardless of how they feel. It’s part of their training.

When we fail? (Because even I fail and have a stinky attitude sometimes.) We pray, ask forgiveness, and carry on. We try to learn and do better. We learn triggers and try to avoid them. Planning and scheduling helps.

Read my post about our ideal day here.

Keeping communication open is key. Helping our kids and youth communicate their feelings, confusions, experiences. Narration about their day is important. Take time to listen.

The hormone part? There are remedies for that. We use essential oils, exercise, whole foods, supplements, plenty rest, and downtime to relieve stress and make sure we are in optimal health. Check your health if you’re always grumpy.

But as parents, we must have grace for our children. They are learning how to be people. We are guides and coaches to help them learn how to manage their emotions, reactions, relationships.

There are no excuses.

Read this series from The REBELution.

Read this article from Christianity Today.

Read Part 2.

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Filed Under: Leadership Tagged With: high school, teen

Teaching a Gifted Middle Schooler

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August 17, 2013 By Jennifer Lambert Leave a Comment

When I taught public school language arts, I was also the gifted coordinator for the middle school.

I tested the children who were recommended for the gifted program and placed children in the gifted classes. I taught gifted eighth grade language arts.

Those students were my shining stars, and I still chat with several of them on Facebook today…and they’re now either in grad school or beginning their exciting lives, getting married and having babies, and some are teachers themselves!

My daughter, Elizabeth, reminds me so much of those students.

She’s in my territory now. Bwahahaha!

I was out of my comfort zone for so long teaching preschool and elementary, and now she’s twelve and learning almost at the level I used to teach when I worked in a school.

It’s a wakeup call for Liz, in a way. She doesn’t like to be told her work isn’t up to a standard.

Elizabeth has never been formally tested for IQ or gifted abilities. I don’t know if she would even test into the gifted program at a school since she doesn’t really have any experience with standardized testing, other than one required by the state we lived in three years ago. She scored exceptionally well on that one, except average in math. But that is neither here nor there. I know she has gifted tendencies. I know her abilities and potential. I saw it in many students and she compares well.

My expectations for her have shifted this school year. I now have a standard by which to judge her work, in a way. I certainly know what she’s capable of, academically. I remember the level of work my students did, and I am gradually shifting Liz more towards that level. I am changing the requirements little by little to fit. She deserves to be challenged. This is why we homeschool!

I evaluate and re-evaluate her school subjects and assignments often to make sure it’s not too much nor too little. It’s a constant worry to balance everything and make sure it’s not too challenging, yet challenging enough. She’s no longer in the grammar stage. She’s quite into the dialectic stage now, and I must constantly hold her to that higher standard.

Sometimes Liz flails about (literally and figuratively) during our weekly review conferences and “forgets” all she that memorized in the past. I have to pick the connections out of her like pulling teeth. Other times, she’s full of words and blowing me away with some of her insights.

I guess I could have worse problems than that all she wants to do is lie around and read…

She has no interest whatsoever in popular culture. I told my friend the other day that Liz was born an old woman. She’s so conservative that I might never have to worry about her wearing immodest clothing or reading, watching, or listening to something inappropriate.

We recently added a logic course and it’s challenging both Liz and me. I remember getting a C in this very class in my second semester of college. {collective gasp!} During our reading of Socrates’ Apology, Liz made this connection: “Socrates was smart. Dr. Sheldon Cooper is smart. I am smart. We should start a club for all the really smart people and no one else can join!” {Never mind that Socrates is quite dead and Sheldon is quite fictional…} It really cracked me up.

I’ve had to explain to Elizabeth that she won’t make any friends bragging about her knowledge of Shakespeare or Latin…

It’s often a challenge to me to provide appropriate yet interesting reading material for a young girl. Her lack of cultural and worldly experience make this somewhat difficult at times. Much of her being “sheltered” is by her own choice and interests, but I am glad to have a “little girl” as long as possible. She will grow up all too soon.

Gifted Characteristics:

  1. Gifted students are often perfectionist and idealistic.
  2. Gifted students may experience heightened sensitivity to their own expectations and those of others.
  3. Gifted students are asynchronous.
  4. Some gifted students are “mappers” (sequential learners), while others are “leapers” (spatial learners).
  5. Gifted students may be so far ahead of their chronological age mates that they know half the curriculum before the school year begins!
  6. Gifted children are problem solvers.
  7. Gifted students often think abstractly and with such complexity that they may need help with concrete study and test-taking skills.
  8. Gifted students who do well in school may define success as getting an “A” and failure as any grade less than an “A”.

Creative Thinking

  • Independent thinker
  • Exhibits original thinking in oral and written expression
  • Comes up with several solutions to a given problem
  • Possesses a sense of humor
  • Creates and invents
  • Challenged by creative tasks
  • Improvises often
  • Does not mind being different from the crowd
  • General Intellectual Ability

  • Formulates abstractions
  • Processes information in complex ways
  • Observant
  • Excited about new ideas
  • Enjoys hypothesizing
  • Learns rapidly
  • Uses a large vocabulary
  • Inquisitive
  • Self-starter
  • Specific Academic Ability

  • Good memorization ability
  • Advanced comprehension
  • Acquires basic skill knowledge quickly
  • Widely read in special interest area
  • High academic success in special interest area
  • Pursues special interest with enthusiasm and vigor
  • Leadership

  • Assumes responsibility
  • High expectations for self and others
  • Fluent, concise self expression
  • Foresees consequences and implications of decisions
  • Good judgment in decision making
  • Likes structure
  • Well-liked by peers
  • Self-confident
  • Organized
  • Psychomotor

  • Challenged by difficult athletic activities
  • Exhibits precision in movement
  • Enjoys participation in various athletic opportunities
  • Excels in motor skills
  • Well coordinated
  • Good manipulative skills
  • High energy level
  • Visual/ Performing Arts

  • Outstanding in sense of spatial relationships
  • Unusual ability in expressing self, feeling, moods, etc., through dance, drama, music, etc.
  • Good motor coordination
  • Exhibits creative expression
  • Desire for producing “own product” (not content with mere copying)
  • Observant
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    Filed Under: Homeschool Tagged With: back to school, homeschool, middle school, teen

    Middle School Art and Music

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    Please see my suggested resources.

    May 7, 2013 By Jennifer Lambert 4 Comments

    Middle school is tough.

    Art and music in middle school is really tough.

    I like to teach art and music along with history from year 1 and we cycle through every 4 years, digging deeper each cycle.

    This unit was our 3rd time through for my eldest.

    How I teach art and music:

    • Listening
    • Fundamentals, Theory, Vocabulary
    • History
    • Practicing and/or Performing

    We listened to Haydn’s Farewell Symphony.

    It was part of our classical history studies with Tapestry of Grace Year 2 and the book was on the girls’ list of reading, but we read it together as a family and was delighted and then I found the whole symphony on YouTube. It is magnificent.


    Liz finally broke out her acrylics and painted this as she listened:

    middle school art

    She loves abstract art.

    I love her representation of the musicians’ candles. She explained which parts of her painting meant which emotion from the symphony.

    Brilliant.

    We often create and complete notebooking pages with music and art.

    Check out these great Haydn notebooking pages.

    Famous Artists & Picture Study Notebooking Pages
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    Filed Under: Homeschool Tagged With: art, Charlotte Mason, classical, history, middle school, Music, notebooking, Tapestry of Grace, teen

    Middle School is Tough

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    Please see my suggested resources.

    January 9, 2013 By Jennifer Lambert Leave a Comment

    Middle school is tough.

    Middle School is Tough

    It isn’t all cute and craft-laden.

    It’s lots more school work than what the littles do. And it doesn’t often make for fun pictures.

    There seems to be a lot of stress – for her with the ups and downs of adolescence – and for me as a parent trying to break through to her.

    The goal as a parent is to teach self-control and keep knocking down the barriers she puts up.

    I encourage her through all those awkward feelings. I dig down deep to remember what it was like for me.

    Feeling Left Out

    Being stuck in the middle is tough.

    She’s outgrowing many childish things, but she’s not old or mature enough for many adult things. The adult world is a scary place and it’s my job to protect her even on the days (moments!) when she thinks she’s ready for it.

    Responsibilities increase and hormones mess up everything.

    It’s important to maintain rules and boundaries even when she pushes back.

    We require attendance at meal times, church, and family read aloud time.

    She may roll her eyes and scoff or cry, but it’s important. She needs to realize that growing up can be uncomfortable, both physically and emotionally, but we must model appropriate behavior in how we handle discomfort and inconvenience.

    Is it easier to let her huff and hide and in her room? Absolutely. But it’s worth the family disruption to teach her self-control. And her siblings watch the ordeals and learn.

    School time is often a battle, but sometimes it’s magic.

    I encourage her to be more independent with her assignments.

    She still wants Mama time: to be read to, to discuss the reading and assignments, and to stay up after her siblings go to bed and watch a movie.

    We re-evaluate school work constantly for something that works well.

    Liz loves notebooking with PowerPoint and Notebooking Publisher. yay for technology!

    working on laptop

    I snapped a pic of Liz’s completed pipe cleaner DNA strand.

    She’s going through Apologia General Science. She does most of the experiments with Dad, so there aren’t usually any pictures since I’m not involved.

    Liz is enjoying our history and literature studies with Tapestry of Grace. We’ll learn about her namesake Elizabeth I in history next week!

    She continues to adore Life of Fred math. She is now on Elementary Physics, a pre-algebra book. She will begin Videotext Algebra next.

    The middle school years are challenging and the rewards are few, but so worth the effort.

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    Filed Under: Homeschool Tagged With: middle school, teen

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