parenting – Page 10 of 10

Quiet Time with Kids

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June 8, 2011 By Jennifer Lambert 2 Comments

The only quiet I get is when those four little rascals are sleeping. Which means, I get to go to bed around midnight and/or wake up before dawn. If I do both, I am rather a tad bit grumpy. So, lately, I have been greeting my pillow around midnight. And I dread leaving it all alone in the morning.

I don’t get a lot of quiet time to myself with four kids.

I know many things will change when my deployed husband returns home next month. (Many things will have to change when he returns…)

So, I am not a morning person. At all. When I can get the little darlings tucked away in their beds before 9 PM, I am happy to finish some chores and settle down to read. By then, I struggle to read what I should read. I often have to discipline myself to read the Bible instead of the latest Kindle freebie. I try to read a Psalm and/or Proverb every evening before getting too comfy and reading something else. I’m also reading a couple books with online book clubs.

Here is my great, almost brand-new La-Z-Boy recliner I found used on KSL classifieds for only $60! I also found the neatest little table at the thrift store that has a built-in book rack on the bottom.

Voilà! My quiet time/reading nook. Yes, my Rubeus kitty loves his new chair! Didn’t you know he rules this house?!

And here is the battle station. Look how neat and tidy!

I love the smell of organization in the morning.

So, in the mornings, after I’ve been so rudely awakened (occasionally at the unspeakable time of 0530) by a crying baby boy…I say a quick good morning prayer, stumble into his room, try to smile and kiss him and love on him while I change his diaper…stumble downstairs and give him his banana and cereal and cup of milk.

I make coffee (the nectar of the gods). I make it to the desk and check my Facebook and emails and delete 7/8 (a very accurate statistic) of them that are about deals and sales to stores I rarely frequent. (I really should unsubscribe – Who can afford it and who braves actual shopping with 4 kids?)

Then, I read my SOAP verse for the day and pray.

By that time, if I’m lucky (usually I’m interrupted), the boy is done with his breakfast and my coffee is brewed. I wipe him up and let him go wreak havoc on a tidy house…and he doesn’t like his morning naps anymore (what am I to do?)!

I try to settle back in with my cuppa and reading, but that doesn’t always happen. Usually, by that time, my youngest daughter comes bounding down the stairs (can you tell she’s a morning person?) and demands a drink and TV.

I usually go get my eldest daughter up to help me at that point.

On good days, I actually make a hot breakfast and we sit together and read devotions, memory verses, missionary cards, character study, etc.

Then we cheerfully do chores together, like dishes and laundry. I start dinner in the Crockpot or with a marinade.

Then we waltz off to do our read-alouds and family school work.

The lil girls do their Funnix and seat work without complaining usually. Elizabeth is Miss Helper and completes ALL her reading and notebooking in record time.

We all together prepare a lovely nutritious lunch, usually from leftovers.

Lately, the kids have been watching TV with cereal and no milk, much too late into the morning. The basement is still without carpet and all our stuff is in the garage from a sudden flood. Except the TV. The humongous projection TV is jammed into the little living room off the kitchen and it reminds me constantly why I banished it to the basement when we moved here.

I hope and pray to have more discipline to turn the TV off more and focus on finishing our school lessons in the next few weeks before deployment is over.

Many afternoons, I encourage the kids to play in the back yard or quietly in their rooms if the weather is bad.

Some days, I long for bedtime for the kids so I can be by myself for a little while.

How to Have Quiet Time with Kids

There’s a learning curve to having quiet time with kids. I have to model it before I can expect it.

Model quiet time with quiet activities, quiet voices, soft music for short times
Quiet busy bags, activities, or books for young children nearby in a safe space
Designate naptime or rest time mid-afternoon in bedrooms for a half hour or hour for everyone to recharge
Downtime in afternoon with poetry, audiobooks, tea, and/or art
Wind-down time in evening with prayers, stories, snuggles, aromatherapy, soft music

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Repairing Broken Roads

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June 3, 2011 By Jennifer Lambert Leave a Comment

The bitter steam of my PG Tips wafts up from the jeweled Indian coaster on the corner of my desk. I sigh, heavy with longing and regrets.

Just today, how many failures and errors and missed opportunities?

Countless.

My angelic towheaded 5-year-old asked, “When do we know we get to meet Jesus?”

I remember the fear I had at her age: wondering who would raise me if my parents died? There was no one, not really. An old uncle or even older grandma; either would probably die before I reached adulthood. I didn’t like the idea of living with either of them. Such horrid thoughts for so young a child. I wonder just exactly what is her fear or is it just curiosity?

I answer her that no one knows how long they have to live and that we should always live a life so to be prepared to meet Jesus. We should pray and do His will and be blessings to others. That seems to satisfy her. This one has such deep thoughts. She often has nightmares. She worries. I see myself in her and it scares me. I want to shelter her, protect her, keep her innocent forever. Give her freedom and encouragement to love unabashedly. I want her to live the barbarian way.

Sometimes, I feel like I’m still sixteen, struggling with the same issues that all teens have: what is my life? It was a frightening and exciting era, full of hope and angst and terror. Much apathy.

It still is frightening and exciting. I think I have mostly gotten over the angst. I reminisce over the errors of my past and cringe. What is my life? What have I accomplished? I quake inside over the inevitable questions that will arise that I want to refuse to answer. Days creep into years and soon now, it will be too late. Scared to be accountable for all that lost time. What if I come up short, wanting?

My tea is cold and bitter now.

I have three daughters to raise to not be like me…despicable me. Let them be bonny and blithe and lovely and loved. Let them not ever have to understand the choices I made.

I have a son to raise to choose a wife who is not at all like me. May he grow up to be a Godly man and choose a virtuous woman from a loving family who will accept him as their own.

May these precious children never know alienation or be disavowed. May they only know love and acceptance.

I know God has a plan. I know God always had a plan. He was with me through all those wretched times when I didn’t call out to Him and all the times I did call out and didn’t hear or heed His answer.

I can wish all I want that I had met my husband when I was, oh, like fourteen…because that would have made some things ever so much simpler, right? I wish he was the only boy I had ever dated.

I often wish I could just erase the 14-28ish years…so many troubles. But, I guess it makes me who I am, even as messed up as all that is.

So, now I pray that God can use my past for good.

He promises that, right? Romans 8:28

Kids growing up in sheltered and safe households with little knowledge of the evils of the world don’t know how great they’ve got it. I often wish I had not known the world so intimately.

I pray my kids have a linear and easy road to adulthood.

I wish I hadn’t gone down so many broken roads.

What would I do differently if I could do it over?

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Schedule and Chore Charts

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February 12, 2011 By Jennifer Lambert 5 Comments

A great schedule and chore chart system we used for a while this year.

I found this idea on Currclick. I think it will work better than any other chore system we’ve used. I must remember to remind the girls to utilize it.

I have acquired the cards from various sources…Homeschool Creations, Homeschool Share, Heart of Wisdom…I plan to combine school and chore activities on one page to save space. We really don’t need more than 16 squares each day between the 3 girls. They usually help each other with the chores. That can be good and can also cause problems when all 3 are in 1 bathroom trying to clean the toilet, for instance. :)~

I got the pocket chart and clock schedule at Target’s dollar spot over the summer. I cut the clock chart into strips and Voilà! I’ve just been lazy not getting to doing this until now.

Here is a close-up of Elizabeth’s chart. I made the titles on Publisher and I thought putting what they did today rather than “Lizzie’s Chores” would be more motivational. I put the cards on the white grid and they move their cards to the colored grid as they are completed. They love the color coding with their favorite colors. :)

They get $1 per week allowance, but they’re not good at remembering to ask for that and I forget to get cash for them. They each tithe 10¢ and give 10¢ to missions each week though.

Some recommend to put some little treats in a bin and if they complete their charts, they can pick one…daily? weekly? I’ve never been one to dangle the carrot, but they’re not doing so well lately, especially the 10 year old, and the littles follow suit! I’m too tired to do all the chores all the time!

Note: We no longer use nor condone chore charts, rewards, punishments. This system helped our kids learn to remember to do necessary tasks when they were very little.

How do you help young kids learn time management?

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