Putting Dreams on Hold

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January 12, 2018 By Jennifer 25 Comments

Sometimes I struggle to quench my feelings and choke down envy when someone mentions buying an amazing house or follows some other beautiful dream that seems so out of reach for me.

I often look at my 40+ years and wonder what I have accomplished.

Sometimes, it’s hard being transient. It gets so lonely.

We’ve lived in so many houses, apartments, hotels, and rooms over the years that when I wake groggily in the wee hours of the morn to comfort a child or when I hear an odd night noise, I am often disoriented as my mind adjusts to the shape of the room rather than a memory of another room across the years.

We don’t waste time or money on Pinterest projects or lots of yard maintenance or prettifying a rental house. We have become minimalists.

All our memories fit into a few Rubbermaid containers.

We never know when we might leave for someplace new. Too often, we leave again before it even starts to feel like home. Sometimes, we start to feel anxious, ready to move on.

We make the best of it, right?

I’ve lived in a home with no dishwasher and 3 cabinets in the kitchen. The washer and dryer were in the dirt-floor basement. I had to walk outside and around to the backyard to get inside.

I’ve lived in a smelly, ant-traipsing apartment where I had to walk up three flights of stairs.

We’ve lived in noisy duplexes with no privacy and a parking lot across the way.

We’ve spent weeks in temporary housing during PCSes.

We lived on base once, and while convenient, it had its cons also.

We’ve rented houses sight-unseen, only to be disappointed at the online deception. But it was too late.

My parents upgraded to a 3000 sq. ft. house on a corner lot shortly after I moved away. I have no childhood home to return to with its memories. I’ve visited three times in eleven years and it doesn’t even smell quite right there. It’s amazing to me how much space they have for two people who never go anywhere.

We’ve sold and bought more vehicles than I can keep count as our family grew and transportation needs changes. Cars mean little to me other than reliability. My mother loved buying her new Chevrolet Caprice Classic every three years, then moved on into small SUVs. Still not sure why they need three cars at age 75.

We’ve attended more churches than any family ever should have to. We even stopped going for a while. It gets tiresome sometimes, trying to fit into a new place, with its cliques and families and friendships that have existed for decades.

As a military wife, I’ve often put my dreams on hold.

I left my college teaching job. I didn’t get that Ph.D. I haven’t written a book – yet.

But military life really doesn’t feel that hard to me most of the time.

I’m cool with holding down the fort during TDY, deployments, emergencies.

I’ve become a pro with organizing, packing, and unpacking.

I’ve dealt with disappointment and put on a brave face for the sake of my children.

They say home is where the military sends you.

And it’s true.

Home is everywhere.

And nowhere.

Home is where my husband is. Where my children are. Where my cats are.

The kids are beginning to ask if this is our last move. How many more? What next? My son wants to know: where will we be when he’s 10?

My eldest daughter just started college and doesn’t plan to leave Ohio. She’s longing to put down roots. I don’t blame her.

So, sure, I put some dreams on hold.

Or maybe I’ve adapted and grown up.

My dreams have changed since I was younger.

I’m no longer that selfish hurting girl who threw tantrums, hid in the closet when I didn’t get my way, or couldn’t handle a full day alone with two kids.

I’m no longer that overwhelmed girl who eats out multiple times a week or prepares quick foods due to a lack of planning.

I’m no longer my mother’s daughter who needs retail therapy to prove my self-worth.

I realize that a beach home might not be in our best interests with hurricanes and flooding. I never imagined living through our basement flooding on Memorial Day in Utah, while my husband was deployed. Really, Utah?

We’ve learned self-reliance since we’ve always lived far from family. It’s still really hard for me to make friends.

We realize how fortunate we have been to see so much of the world. Hawaii, Europe, places in between, and who knows what the future holds?

I’m not interested in recognition in the field of education. I will never go back to get a Ph.D. It doesn’t matter to me anymore. I am educating my children and I see the fruits of my labors there. Yes, it’s interesting to me that there are two moms on my new street who are finishing up their Ph.D.’s and it only brought a tiny twinge of regret.

I’ve learned to have different priorities.

I want to live debt-free. And not just financial freedom. We pray the Lord’s prayer every Sunday at church, but I want to live it.

Forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors… Matthew 6:12

I strive for grace, forgiveness, and kindness.

I pray to fight the good fight, finish the race, keep the faith…

I am resilient, flexible, strong.

I don’t have to put my dreams on hold indefinitely. I can incorporate my dreams into the life I am living – adapting to what is best for this season and our family dynamics.

Linking up: Our Holiday Journey, Barbie Swihart, Modest Mom, Blessed But Stressed, Inspiration for Moms, Simple Life of a Fire Wife, GodSized Dreams, Create with Joy, Holley Gerth, Blogghetti, Life of Faith, Mrs. AOK, Timeless Mama, Teaching What is Good, LouLou Girls, April Harris, Live Randomly Simple, Trekking Thru, Meghan Weyerbacher, Purposeful Faith, Jessi’s Design, Soaring with Him, Jaime Wiebel, Mississippi Mom, Ducks in a Row, Our Three Peas, Raven Would, Bringing up Georgia, Breakthrough Homeschooling, Gingersnap Crafts, Jennifer Dukes Lee, Sincerely Paula, Debbie Kitterman, Quietly Reminded, Mommynificent, Penny’s Passion, Organized 31, Flourishing Today, Brenda Bradford Dottinger, A Bountiful Love, Creative K Kids, Life Beyond the Kitchen, Simply Sweet Home, Home crafts by Ali, Create with Joy, Nancy on the Home Front, The Charm of Home, Counting My Blessings, Coffee with Us3, Overwhelmed to Fulfilled, Easy Peasy Pleasy, Chic on a Shoestring, Anna Nuttall, The Answer is Chocolate, Momfessionals, Katherine’s Corner, The Blended Blog, Susan Mead, Arabah Joy, Becoming Press, Journeys in Grace, Life with Lorelai, Lyli Dunbar, Being a Wordsmith, Our mini Family, Spiritual Sundays,

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Homeschooling Where the Military Sends Us

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September 21, 2017 By Jennifer 1 Comment

Homeschooling and the military life work well for us.

We all love lists, so…

5 reasons why we love homeschooling and military life.

1. We don’t have to be on any particular PCS rotation.

A majority of PCSes take place during summer to coincide with school transfers. We don’t have to worry about that. It makes our lives easier that we don’t have to stress about school. We can take a break or “school” on the road. Occasionally, we just have a longer time to travel to our next destination.

2. That whole “You Get to See the World” thing.

I met my husband in Georgia, where I grew up. We spent a couple years in San Antonio, Texas. While we didn’t have much time there to see the sites (and I was pregnant the whole time), we did get to visit some amazing landmarks like the Alamo and Riverwalk and some beautiful country. We ate well of all sorts of amazing Mexican foods. It was divine. Then we got to live in Hawaii for three tough years. I know, but somebody has to do it! We got to see a volcano and gorgeous mountains and beaches. We went snorkeling and birdwatching. We had flora galore to inspect while we lived there. It was predominantly a different culture, and we loved it! We loved all the food, oh my. Malasadas, manapuas, poke, shave ice, and amazing rice served everywhere – even at Burger King! In Utah…we weren’t into the whole winter sports thing, but we enjoyed camping. Germany opened up so many travel opportunities and we were so thankful to see much of Europe.

3. You get a whole new perspective on missions.

Georgia is in the Bible Belt. After I married, we didn’t stay there long. Then we moved to Texas, still the Bible Belt…not that there weren’t missions opportunities, but we didn’t hear The Call. We were busy surviving. While in Hawaii, we were in the minority in both race and religion. Many Buddhists, LDS, and other non-believers live there. We attended a very missions-conscious Independent Baptist church. Then in Utah, I felt that we were there primarily to be a light in a sea of darkness. I met so many lost souls, both Mormon and not, who are just so turned off to anything resembling church. Germany has a very Christian culture, but few participate in church or have faith. We recently moved to Ohio and found an amazing church home. It breaks my heart to see hurting people. But an amazing thing occurs in the hearts of my children. I see them become aware of others who need Jesus.

4. You become family when there is none near.

Some of my husband’s military co-workers and their families have become our greatest advocates and friends. Others have come alongside us in our times of need when we weren’t able to fly home or have family visit us. In Hawaii, it’s a long way to fly to the mainland, so we often shared holiday meals with other families rather than spend Thanksgiving, Christmas, and Easter alone. We traveled over US holidays in Europe. And when you meet someone and realize they’re either currently active duty or retired, there is an immediate connection and camaraderie and mutual respect. And this attitude helps my children to see that we’re all one big family in Christ and that we rely on each other and help each other.

5. My kids learn respect.

I grew up as an Army brat. My dad was a Chief Warrant Officer. My grandfather was a Chief Petty Officer in the Navy. I married an Air Force officer. I never knew any other kind of life. My kids don’t know any other way of life.

They don’t know what it’s like not to have full medical coverage. If we have any tiny little ailment, we can get a same-day appointment at the clinic and get it checked out and receive a prescription at no additional cost. We can get referrals to specialists. We have ER care for urgent situations. It’s a blessing, for sure. {And I know some military wives who find something to complain about this concept…smh}

We shop tax-free at the BX and commissaries (which came in mighty handy in Hawaii where prices are exorbitant!). We get discounts at many stores as thanks for my husband’s service to our country. And my kids learn how good they have it when many struggle so much for these basics that we often take for granted.

But occasionally, Daddy has to go TDY for a long time or deploy for many months to someplace we’ve only heard of on TV and seen online. It gets lonely and we fear for his safety. We pray and Skype and get upset when he misses birthdays and milestones.

But we understand why the separation is necessary. We’re oh, so proud that he is serving to protect our freedoms that most of the world doesn’t enjoy. We tear up during the national anthem and when we see eagles and Clydesdales in commercials. We get a thrill when the boom of F-16s tears apart the sky over our heads. It’s the sound of freedom. So many take our liberties for granted or abuse the idea of freedom. We’re not nationalistic and we understand a lot about the wider world and where the USA fits into the scheme of politics. We rush to express our gratitude and shake hands with wrinkled old veterans in their faded uniforms, handing out little paper poppies on Armistice Day. We met a WWII veteran in Normandy and were thrilled to listen to his story. The sound of Taps being played for any reason chokes us up while at the same time warming our hearts that a soldier/airmen/sailor/Marine/coastman has done his ultimate duty.

My kids learn about respect and duty more than most. They are entitled to nothing. Everything that our family receives is a privilege that we don’t necessarily deserve, but that is paid for by the military service of their father and my husband, also our grandfathers and my father. While we don’t necessarily agree with many of our country’s politics, world policy, military presence in many countries, or any war, we cannot vocalize that in protest.

We pray that no military member ever pays the ultimate price for those privileges. But we understand that necessity and very real possibility and we have extreme respect for all military service members – past, present, and future.

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5 Stages of Grief: PCS Edition

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May 17, 2017 By Jennifer 16 Comments

PCS season is stressful.

I feel like our military family goes through the Five Stages of Grief every few years as we pack up and move to a new location.

The Five Stages of Grief: denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance.

Denial

As soon as PCS season begins to loom, I go into denial. I don’t want to purge, clean, organize, pack out, and travel to a new location.

We’ve tried to extend a year at several locations…and DENIED.

I go about my business as usual.

I pretend it won’t be happening until I can’t pretend anymore.

Anger

After getting denied our extension…and realizing others had been granted theirs…

I got angry.

I got angry at the military, at the assignments officer (who even teased us with a phone call and messed up our orders), at God, at my husband for dragging us all over for 20+ years.

I’m angry at myself for being angry.

I’m angry that we didn’t get to stay another year, even though my daughter is a senior. I’m angry we didn’t get orders to anywhere I want to go.

I’m angry about silly things too.

I regret the places we didn’t get to go. I regret so many things.

Bargaining

It’s not like we have any real bargaining chips.

We have to go where we’re told.

Even if we’re excited about the new location…

I go back and forth with possible packout dates, car shipment, what to do with the cats. All the checklist items like transferring mail, packing suitcases and backpacks, clearing the pantry. So much to do!

How much can I fit in a suitcase? Usually we’re living out of suitcases for 3+ months and it’s hard to determine how little we need, what we can live without.

If we’re not thrilled with where we’re going…

I go back and forth in my mind, wondering what we could have done differently.

Did we put the wrong locations on the list?

Are we paying for some forgotten sin?

Is there a reason we’re being sent there?

Can my husband deploy or volunteer?

And I start to think of the next station. Surely, it will be better? We only have to be at this station maybe 2-4 years. We’ll transfer as soon as we can.

Depression

Reality sets in.

I get depressed.

I start to slowly organize, purge, donate, sell items we won’t need.

I snap at my husband who always waits until the last minute to do anything.

I get anxious about our cats.

I get anxious about money.

There are so many unknowns.

I halfheartedly look at housing at the new location. I research places to visit for day trips. I join Facebook groups.

I start to distance myself from the current location.

I realize I have to say goodbye to my houseplants. I’m sad because the new people won’t love my houseplants or herb garden the way I do, the way they deserve to be loved!

Once the household goods are packed and shipped, the house always feels cold and dark and silent. Ominous. I have trouble sleeping in an empty house. There’s little for me to do to keep busy. No beds to make, no projects to complete.

This is usually the stage when I get physically ill. The stress that has built up becomes too overwhelming.

I spent one packout completely bedridden, except for rushing to the bathroom to vomit or have diarrhea. The girls were trapped in the bedroom with me since we didn’t have anyone to help. This was the one location my husband wanted so much, to be near his family members. Such a disappointment that was! It was also the worst packout we’ve ever had, with “cousins” and “friends” arriving the last day to rush the pack job and stealing some valuables I hadn’t stored properly. Because I was sick!

We’ve also had some rental horror stories.

We’ve never lived in a nice house. Most houses have been so embarrassing that we never want to invite anyone over for any reason. We’ve kinda resigned ourselves to having absentee landlords, lazy landlords, wornout and poorly kept rental houses, renting sight unseen…until we retire. We are always sure well get our deposit back from the landlord…we do our best to keep everything as nice as possible.

In the house in Utah, we’d made some expensive upgrades to lighting in the kitchen and removed wallpaper from the kitchen and living room and painted it a nice neutral color, but he kept making petty excuses. He wanted the lawn mowed and edged to perfection. In the dark! Our goods had already shipped and we hadn’t had a working lawnmower for over a month since he refused to pay to fix it. He even wanted my kids’ welcome chalk drawings power-washed off the sidewalk! We enlisted the help of neighbors to talk to him and we finally got it back later that evening.

In Germany, we had this weird fiberglass wallpaper in the kitchen. Nothing would clean off some grease spots and they had told us it was ok and could be painted, but then they tried to keep our entire deposit of two months’ rent. The housing office had to go back and forth with the landlady several times to work it out.

We are always devastated to realize how cruel some people can be. Deposits are our financial lifeline to move into a house in our new location.

Acceptance

The packers came. I’ve done all I could do. Luckily, we’ve been blessed with amazing teams (except that one time!) who make jokes, have fun personalities, and appreciate the snacks, drinks, and meals we provide.

I accept our fate as I stroll through my empty, cold, echoey house, awaiting the move date.

The last few days are always hard, stressful, anxiety-ridden. So many loose ends need to be tied up in such a short period of time.

I feel poignant about the memories we share about this location. The places we’ve been, the meals we’ve eaten, the people we’ve met.

I start to look forward to a new beginning.

You might also like: Dealing with Disappointment.

Linking up: Bountiful Love, Suzanne Eller, Saving 4Six, Penny’s Passion, My Learning Table, The Mommyhood Moments, Organized31, Mommynificent, Brenda Bradford Dottinger, Sincerely Paula, Debbie Kitterman, Katherine’s Corner, Happily Ever After Etc, Life Beyond the Kitchen, Creative K Kids, Life with Lorelai, Happy and Blessed Home, Counting My Blessings, Being a Wordsmith, Arabah Joy, The Answer is Chocolate, Resting Mom Face, Easy Peasy Pleasy, Coffee with Us3, Crystal T Waddell, Create with Joy, Simply Sweet Home, Our Mini Family, Modest Mom, Purposeful Faith, Wise Woman, Southern Beauty Guide, Jamiffer, Simple Steps for Living Life, Donna Reidland, Simple Life of a Fire Wife, MaryAndering Creatively, Meghan Weyerbacher, Sarah E Frazer, Messy Marriage, Holley Gerth, Christian Blogger Community, Mississippi Mom, Becoming Press, Jaime Wiebel, Journeys in Grace, Jennifer Dukes Lee, Holly Barrett, Life of Faith, Simply Every, Inspiration for Moms, A Fresh Start, Mrs. AOK, Five Kids and a Dog, Adventures of Mel, This Momma’s Ramblings, Our Three Peas, Pat and Candy, Marilyn’s Treats, LouLou Girls, My Husband Has Too Many Hobbies, JEmbellish, Live Randomly Simple, Gingersnap Crafts, April J Harris, Teaching What Is Good, Epic Mommy Adventures, Classical Homemaking,

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Military Spouse Mental Health

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November 17, 2016 By Jennifer 5 Comments

I’ve read a plethora of articles recently (specifically here and here) about depression and substance abuse among military spouses. Many of the reactions to this “news” is “Well, duh!” from so many spouses who have experienced stress while being married to a military member.

Do military spouses experience more stress than other spouses?

While I knew what I was getting into when I married my husband, that doesn’t negate the stress I’ve felt over the years. Many spouses have rose-colored glasses and don’t quite comprehend the moving around, deployment, or protocol issues involving rank and military careers.

Military spouses are overwhelmed and unheard, often too scared to reach out for help when they need it most.

What are some of the stressors facing military spouses?

Loss of Career

Many spouses put their careers on hold or terminate their employment altogether when marrying into the military.

It’s difficult to keep resumes updated with gaps of several years due to PCSing, having babies, moving out of the country. At many military installations, the only job options that seem available to spouses are cashiering at the Exchange or bagging groceries at the commissary. While that doesn’t look appealing to many, sometimes the cash flow is needed to support a growing family.

Some careers are more mobile than others. Some spouses become entrepreneurs or get involved with MLMs. And then they have to pack all that up and move every few years, find new clients and contacts.

After experiencing almost every single life stressor on the index during our first two years of marriage, I ended my career as an English professor to stay home and educate my own children. While I don’t regret that decision, I do sometimes feel less-than, especially in social situation when I am just the stay-at-home, homeschooling mom.

It wasn’t much of a choice.

Marriage Struggles

Being married to a military member is sometimes really tough.

And I’m not talking about just deployments and PCS stuff.

My concerns are often very different from my husband’s. I often look at a bigger picture.

I’ve tried the spouse clubs. I’ve tried volunteering. It’s like middle school all over again. I never go to functions. It doesn’t affect my husband’s career, no matter what anyone says, if I’m there or not. No one cares. No one notices.

My husband works with many different people all day, every day. I understand he has a work persona.

I also understand that when he’s home, he’s always on call. He’s had to leave in the middle of the night for emergencies. He’s had to go TDY and missed important family events. He left for deployment on our anniversary.

It’s my job to remind him that he is a father and a husband. Work is not everything.

He also doesn’t like to make decisions at home since he makes so many at work. I’m usually fine making the decisions. I’m confident and efficient. But I sometimes actually want his input or help. I don’t want to nag. I don’t want to have a tantrum about the smelly trash every week. I shouldn’t have to remind him to change the tires before it snows. Sure, I’m in charge of home and homeschool and he works away from home all day. It’s more than a full-time job for me too. I’m never “off duty.” I don’t get an OPR or EPR. I don’t get awards for doing my job.

Our household needs both parents to work well.

I want the kids’ memories to be good ones. I want them to grow up and desire to visit home for the holidays. I struggle every day to develop a healthy family atmosphere.

Family Issues

We’ve chosen to homeschool our four kids, and that relieves a lot of stress involving school. But even in the homeschool community, we’ve sometimes had issues fitting in. Some places followed a traditional school schedule and their activities began before our household goods and homeschool items arrived. We were empty-handed for several weeks.

Finding activities for my kids to participate in has sometimes been hard. Gymnastics was a thing for a while, but taking breaks for months and testing into a class every time we moved took its toll and my kids didn’t feel it was worth trying to keep up.

Overseas family activities are often only available on base and the quality is just really poor with such a monopoly. We decided not to waste our money anymore.

There are few options for teenagers to get part-time jobs – or even drive – when stationed overseas. Overseas education options are DODS or homeschool, occasionally private schools in English might be available.

Deployment

Of course deployments are hard. Those months away can be scary. It’s hard having a long-distance relationship. It’s hard to feel left behind while the military member is off doing a job keeping our world safe. Communication is often sporadic.

But the preparation for the separation is tough too. Arguments, bitterness, sadness, anger – these feelings are normal and natural, even if they add stress to an already stressful sitation. They help prepare us for a long time apart. We try to distance ourselves so it doesn’t hurt so much.

Then, upon return, the reintregation process can be hard. The spouse has dealt with everything alone for months and feels awkward making room again. Returning to a routine that was normal before the deployment seems weird. The military member has lived a completely different life during deployment and returning to a life and routine at home feels strange.

All of this creates lots of friction – for a long time. Kids find it really hard to understand. They’re just happy to have both parents at home.

PCS

It gets really tiresome moving every few years. Some people may think it’s exciting to get to move around, starting over new.

And it was for the first few times.

After 5, 6, 7, or more moves around the world, it gets exhausting.

We lament that we will forever be renters.

My soul longs for a place to call home.

My kids have no hometown. Their memories take place all over and I find it hard to reconcile that sometimes. We don’t have a doorpost with measurements marking the heights of our kids over the years.

After living in one place for 3 years, the kids get antsy, knowing it’s almost time to move on. They have a transcient life.

PCS time is a huge, long process of waiting. Waiting for news, official orders, dates for packing and moving and traveling. Then more waiting. For household goods to arrive. Finding a new place to live. Unpacking, organizing, settling…for just a few years. Until we do it all again.

The first year in a new location is getting to know everything, learning our way around, trying to fit in.

The second year is comfortable, feeling almost like we belong, enjoying everything the area has to offer.

The third year is realizing we’re gonna move soon. We mentally shut down, purging stuff we won’t need in our new location or things we can’t take – like houseplants, outgrown toys, 220 plugs.

Then panic sets in. We realize we’re never gonna see that flower bloom again. This is the last snowfall here for us. We’ll never get to visit there like we planned. It makes me physically ill, grieving because it’s a loss I can’t control.

Then hope peeks through. We wonder where our next location will be. We imagine a nice, big yard with a garden, better than this one. We hope we can find a good kitchen with double ovens. We long for a fireplace since we didn’t have one here. Then we worry about commute times and gas prices. How will I budget when we don’t know the price of utilities and food? Will the new neighbors be nice and welcoming? Will we be able to find a church right away? I worry about how our family will fit in to a new location when we move. Just because our BAH might cover a certain amount, doesn’t mean I want to live in certain areas. We’re not country club people.

I count milestones by which locale we were living when they took their first step, got stitches, learned to ride a bike.

We have to have a different definition of home than most. Home is wherever we’re all together, even if that’s by Skyping during a deployment or in a TLF apartment for a month. Home is where I do the wugga chugga after bathtime. It’s where we read the stories and say the prayers before bedtime.

We count holidays by which kitchen we made Thanksgiving dinner or celebrated a birthday. We usually spend holidays alone or travel, trying to forget it’s a holiday.

Is that the year in Hawaii I had a Blue’s Clues birthday?

My kids lose track of friends when we move away. Those friends grow up, forgetting, losing touch. It makes us sad. We remember. We reminisce the fun moments.

Remember when Natalia and I played at the creek at that park in San Antonio and we caught tadpoles?

I live the losses along with my children. I long for them to have roots. And a place to call home.

Etc.

It might seem petty to complain about some things, but it’s not like the average spouse has some of these issues. And they are real issues to me.

Moving to new living quarters every few years brings stress with finding a rental that suits us.

Researching areas in a new city within the housing allowance, and calculating expenses within a budget, along with commute times to the military member’s new post is a stressful experience – and usually falls to the spouse alone. Then, there are comforts to purchase to make it home, often with very little money – curtains, rugs, maybe even furniture. Money is always an issue.

I worry about our items in storage. What if they’re damaged or lost? They’re our memories and ties to the past.

I wonder if our lawn mower will work after 3 years in the shed, unused. Will we have unnecessarily moved it across the world twice only to have to buy a new one after all?

Finding a new church is a HUGE issue. I hate church shopping.

I want my kids to have friends, to be able to play and be as normal as possible.

I loathe having to find new dentists and hair stylists. It just sucks.

We seldom seem to fit in. We don’t have family around for support. It’s hard making friends when they know you’ll just move away in a few years.

Please understand: It’s not all bad.

We’ve gotten to live all over the world and experience some amazing travel – learning about history, culture, art. My kids are resilient for having to move to a new location every few years. The world is a smaller place to them than it was to me at their age.

I think military spouses are at greater risk for depression, substance abuse, and more. It’s a very stressful life. Without proper support systems in place, it’s even harder.

Who do you turn to for help when you need it?

Are you stressed?

Do you seem to carry the weight of the world upon your shoulders?

Turn off the news. Get off the Internet. Get outside and try to relax.

How are you affected?

Learn to recognize the symptoms of stress.

What can you control?

Make amends.

What can you change?

Try to let it go instead of worrying about it.

What can you set aside?

Simplify! Say NO.

How can you fill your love tank?

Take care of yourself.

You can read about how we use essential oils to help with our moods. I also use a GoLite in winter and make sure my vitamin D levels are high.

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Life is an Adventure

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September 23, 2016 By Jennifer Leave a Comment

Life is an ADVENTURE!

I kind of knew what I was getting into back in 2005, marrying an Air Force officer.

I knew the military life, even though my family was never transcient. My dad was in the Army. I grew up familiar with military protocol and all that.

We got married in January, and the Air Force scheduled a deployment for spring, that got canceled when his father suddenly passed away. Then they PCSed us in June. I found out I was pregnant the day the movers came to pack out the house.

It was the first time I’d ever lived outside my home state of Georgia.

The transition was a bit brutal for me, being away from all family and friends.

We had our two middle girls during the two years we lived in Texas. My husband’s mother passed away suddenly.

Then we moved to Hawaii and had our son.

Then we lived a rather uneventful four years in Utah, though my husband did deploy during my first winter season ever in my life.

We live in Germany now and are preparing for another PCS this spring, probably back to the States.

Life is definitely an adventure!

I have the T-shirt to prove it!

I love the soft material and V-neckline! It’s a dressier tee shirt than most. A great length and feminine shape. Cents of Style is the best!

Military life has taught me a few things:

I’ve learned to handle stress well.

We experienced almost all the major life stress events within our first two years of marriage (marriage, deaths, births, moving) and we survived. It made our family stronger to overcome these events.

I’ve learned to be flexible.

Orders change. Things happen. I am not in control. I look to God for my strength.

I’ve learned to be optimistic.

Every military base has benefits and interesting things about the location. There’s no sense in being miserable when we must live there for 2-4 years. We knew people who hated living in Hawaii! Having a good attitude is important and modeling optimism for my kids teaches them how to be content in all circumstances.

We love to travel.

We’ve gotten the opportunity to go to the Hawaiian islands, Yellowstone and the Tetons, camping and fishing in Utah, road trip from Utah to Georgia, visiting my husband’s two sisters in Illinois, and explore all over Europe. We homeschool, so I can teach my children wherever we are, focusing on historical and cultural places I only learned about in books.

We look forward to more exciting adventures!

I’ve learned that military life is…an adventure.

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Preparing Kids for a PCS

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August 25, 2016 By Jennifer 14 Comments

Moving is stressful for anyone, but especially so for children.

PCS is a huge change, whether it’s the first or the fifth.

PCS=Permanent Change of Station, even though it seems temporary – usually only 2-4 years!

According to the DOD, the average military child moves 6 to 9 times between kindergarten and high school graduation.

Military families relocate 10 times more often than civilian families – on average, every 2 to 4 years.

That’s a roller-coaster!

Moving is more stressful than divorce.

Think about that.

How can we make the moving transition easier on our kids?

Prepare

As soon as you know a PCS is coming up, start preparing the kids for the transition.

Talk about it, explain that you’ll have to pack up everything you own and move to a new home.

Even though it could take a few more months to receive actual orders, it’s important to start the conversation so that kids can prepare their hearts and minds for the changes.

Discuss purging items and having a yard sale. I have a PCS checklist you can download!

Educate

Start reading about moving. Show your child what to expect.

Learn about your new location as soon as you know where you’re going. Research the area, school opportunities, activities, church, day trip ideas.

It’s exciting to move to a new town and explore all it has to offer!

There’s an app from Sesame Street: The Big Moving Adventure, available from iTunes, Amazon, and Google Play. I have a book list at the end of the post for you!

Listen

Pay attention to your kids’ needs. Listen to their complaints and concerns.

Moving is never easy and it might be very difficult for kids to leave their friends, school, activities.

Babies and toddlers have a hard time understanding. Teens might rebel.

Try to handle disappoint well. If you’re upset about where you’re going, the kids will internalize that and have bad feelings about their new locale – and you’re stuck with it for a few years!

Every location has benefits. We’ve PCSed to some places not on our list and we made the best of it.

We also knew people who hated living in Hawaii and Germany, so there’s that.

Prayer does wonders!

Celebrate

Have a farewell party to say goodbyes.

Give your child a job to do during packing out and moving in so they feel like a valuable part of the process.

Do something silly and fun like having a pizza picnic on the empty floor after packing out, or sleeping on an air mattress the last night. You can repeat this on the other end!

Let your child pack a few treasures for comfort during travel.

Try to stay at cool hotels if possible during travel to your new location.

Start out at the new location with new traditions.

Let your child choose something for his or her new room, within reason and budget – new bedding, a paint color for an accent wall, a collectible, a new rug or picture.

Keep in Touch

With today’s technology, it’s easier than ever to keep in touch with friends from around the world.

Make it easy with your children and their friends with social media or free email accounts. There’s Skype and Facetime too.

I know some families who even plan vacations back to visit friends or somewhere in between to meet every year.

Get Help

It’s an added stress to have little ones underfoot during packing out and moving. Enlist a trusted teen or adult friend to help keep little kids occupied in the backyard, with a video in a corner, or even taking them out to get ice cream or to the park. This gives them a break from the tediousness of packing and protects them from getting in the way. Then you get to focus on the task at hand.

Put aside big changes during a move. Don’t potty-train or wean babies during this stressful time. Schedules go out the window.

Get Kids Settled ASAP

Get kids’ rooms back in order as soon as possible to make the transition easier on them. Familiar blankets and toys will help them feel comfortable in a new home.

Then work on the kitchen and common spaces – with the necessary items you need immediately.

Find fun new places to explore and meet new friends! Let your child lead you in her time. We have a couple very social, outgoing kids and two who are more reserved and quiet.

Look at moving as an adventure! Happiness is contagious and the kids will catch that mood if you show it.

Here’s a great PCS printable pack for little ones and some planning printables!

Recommendations:

Linking up: Sandy’s POV, Curly Crafty Mom, The Mrs. Tee, Written Reality, Blogghetti, Life of Faith, Mary Andering Creatively, Lori Schumaker, A Proverbs 31 Wife, Denise Designed, Pam’s Party and Practical Tips, A Fresh Start, Inspiration for Moms, Darling Downs Diaries, Missional Women, Modest Mom, Moms the Word, Rich Faith Rising, Sarah Celebrates, Southern Beauty Guide, VMG206, Simple Life of a Fire Wife, Holly Barrett, Crystal Storms, Wife Mommy Me, W2W Ministries, Holley Gerth, Jamiffer, Adventures of Mel, The Natural Homeschool, Hip Homeschool Moms, Jaime Wiebel, Christian Blogger Community, Messy Marriage, Pat and Candy, Oh My Heartsie Girl, Women with Intention, Frog’s Lilypad, 3DLessons4Life, I Choose Life, Moms are Frugal, Year Round Homeschooling, Penny’s Passion, Live Laugh Rowe, Katherine’s Corner, A Bountiful Love, Saving 4 Six, Create with Joy, Diary of a Real Housewife, Sincerely Paula, Life with Lorelai, A Kreative Whim, Organized 31, Juggling Real Food and Real Life, Happy and Blessed Home, Being a Wordsmith, Crafty Moms Share,

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Preparing for a PCS

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August 9, 2016 By Jennifer 1 Comment

We’ve PCSed four times now as a family and are planning for our fifth PCS next summer – back to the States.

We’ve done a partial DITY, two OCONUS moves, and driven across the country. Bonus points for overnight flights with babies and toddlers!

PCS is always stressful, no matter how organized you are.

There are always surprises. There are always snags in the system. There’s always something forgotten.

Here’s how to plan for your PCS:

Organize

Clean the house.

Organize everything in its place to make the next step easier. Involve everyone in the family. Make it a game.

Straighten the lesser-used areas like the garage, shed, basement, attic, wherever you only visit a couple times a year, so you don’t miss something and have to scramble last minute. I like to put almost everything in plastic storage bins. Most movers check the bins and then just tape them shut for extra protection.

Discuss with your landlord or real estate agent any repairs or updates to the house as soon as possible so there aren’t any last minute surprises.

Inventory

Inventory everything you own.

Make lists. Take pictures or video. Color-code the lists. Inventory DVDs and books. Make note of all jewelry, valuables, and collectibles. Record serial numbers of electronics.

Gather personal records and keep in a binder – birth certificates, SS cards, medical and/or shot records, school forms, insurance policies, warranties, pet documents.

Items lended or borrowed need to be returned and retrieved. Make sure to return all library books!

Make a note of all items that need to be repaired or sold or donated.

Consume

Only purchase as much as you need so you can consume items before the move.

We don’t have the storage space to buy in bulk anymore, but we still begin buying even smaller amounts of items so we’re not left with too much and have to throw it out, mail it, or figure out how to pack it. The goal is to have an empty pantry, fridge, freezer, and bathroom cabinet before the move!

Many movers won’t pack up any liquids, gels, or food items – even if they’re unopened and brand new, especially in summer months when items can melt or go rancid during the transition.

Reduce

Sell or donate items you no longer need.

We have some almost-new 220 appliances to sell.

We have some German items that most likely won’t work out in an American house.

Anything broken beyond repair should be thrown out.

I’ve listed some organizing and packing suggestions in my other PCS post.

Timeline:

1 year

As soon as possible, begin saving for non-reimbursable moving expenses. Expenses always seem to just pop up on both sides of the move.

Pets are your responsibility and have been our largest expense with vet records, shots, agriculture forms, and plane tickets.

9-6 months

Request or update tourist passports if needed.

Plan vehicle shipments if needed.

Order new credit or bank cards if expiration dates are soon.

Update ID cards if expiration dates are soon.

Discuss the move with children so they can prepare themselves for the transition. Research the new location.

3 months

Discuss that you’re moving with your landlord, and plan for any repairs or updates to ensure you receive your security deposit.

Fill out change of address forms with IRS and USPS.

Check and update auto maintenance. Ensure you have up-to-date car insurance information.

Make vet appointments for pets to ensure microchipping and shots are up to date.

Most OCONUS contracts must be terminated at least 30 days out.

Research education options, procedures, and dates for enrollment for children.

Determine which items are professional, unaccompanied, household goods, and non-temp storage.

Make reservations with TLF or hotels.

1-2 months

The military member should receive orders by now.

Request dislocation allowance.

Most CONUS contracts must be terminated at least 30 days out.

Military families can terminate contracts with no penalty with a copy of PCS orders. Cable/satellite TV, Internet, cell phones, utilities need to be cancelled or transferred. Request security deposits!

Cancel or transfer memberships and subscriptions. Request a letter of transfer from local church and clubs, like Scouts or other national organizations.

Alert or transfer banking information to new location. Let them know you are traveling.

Renew medical prescriptions.

Clean drapes and rugs.

Store needed computer files on CD, disk, thumb drive, or portable hard drive.

Confirm transportation details with movers. Schedule pickup and delivery dates with movers and arrange for storage if needed.

Contact housing at new location for on-base options or begin house hunting online.

2-3 weeks

Separate items or label: professional, unaccompanied, household goods, or non-temp storage.

Last few days

Set aside cleaning supplies for after movers clear out.

Remove wall items like pictures, curtain rods, racks.

Have plastic zip bags of all sizes to put smaller items into to make life easier on the other side – silverware, utensils, junk drawer items, craft supplies, bathroom drawer items.

Remove items from attic or crawl space.

Disconnect electronics.

Place original boxes beside items.

Label items not to be packed or moved. Put them all together if possible.

Drain garden hoses and all oil/gas from lawn machines.

Get rid of all flammables and return or give away propane tanks.

Pack suitcases and items to carry with you and put aside.

Moving day

Make sure kitchen is clean. Take out the trash!

Remove all laundry from washer and dryer!

Strip beds.

Have pets restrained or in kennels.

Have snacks and drinks for the movers. We usually have pastries and snacks available with sports drinks and water, and ask what they want for lunch.

Have a place clearly labeled for trash items so it’s not packed.

Have colored stickers to label moving boxes. Write labels on boxes for each room.

Vacuum and clean the house once it’s empty or hire a PCS cleaning.

After the move

Find a new home! You typically have 30 days in TLF to find a new residence.

Update all your information with your new address.

You can often request temporary furniture items until HHG arrives.

Schedule delivery of goods with transportation office.

Plan for where furniture and boxes should go. Label doorjambs or lintels with colored stickers to match box stickers. Place sticky notes at each room to match box labels.

Movers should reassemble items and can unpack boxes and remove packing materials. In some places, movers can return to remove packing materials within 30 days.

Find a new place of worship.

Meet new friends!

Some moving expenses can be filed on tax returns!

Get the printable PCS Timeline Checklist!

Do you have any PCS tips or stories?

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Real Food Cooking During PCS

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August 2, 2016 By Jennifer 1 Comment

When we PCS, everything gets packed up.

Sometimes, weeks, or even more than a month in advance of our actual move.

Our options are to stay in our current housing situation with air mattresses or borrowed furnishings or move into temporary housing which is like an extended-stay hotel.

It’s never convenient, and we don’t want to eat out or buy junk food.

So, how do we still cook real food during PCS season?

We get creative.

We simplify.

We make it fun.

Usually, we clear out the refrigerator, freezer, and pantry as much as we can the weeks before a PCS. Then, we pack up the remains of the pantry, fridge, and freezer to eat in our TLF before our final out.

Another handy tip is to bake breads, muffins, cakes, and cookies ahead of time to have on hand before all that cookware is packed. Store the items in the freezer or even a freezer at church or a friend’s until TLF is ready.

We try not to cut too many corners, but obviously, our cookware is packed up and on a boat and we’re ready to travel, so making smoothies or homemade bread aren’t usually an option. The facilities in temporary lodging aren’t ideal – with few amenities for cooking well.

Sometimes, we can borrow essential kitchen items from friends or the Airmen’s Closet until our household goods show up.

Thankfully, most TLF apartments have decent coffee makers, toasters, mixing bowls, measuring cups and spoons, a colander, utensils, and pots and pans.

We usually miss good tongs, clean baking pans with silpats, good knives, and some other items we deem “necessities.” I miss my sourdough and kombucha and options for healthy cooking fats.

I pack my favorite cooking utensil, one or two good knives, tongs, and several spices (like garlic, salt, pepper, Italian herbs) inside a plastic zip bag in my checked luggage. We’ve even packed up melamine plates and bowls before to make life easier.

I don’t even play. I need these things handy with a hungry family.

A photo posted by Jennifer at Royal Little Lambs (@jenalambert) on Apr 29, 2014 at 8:42am PDT

While staying at TLF or hotels, we often purchase simple and easy to prepare foods at local grocery stores that can be grilled at a nearby park grill hut or a disposable hibachi grill. It’s not much different than what we do when we’re camping. We even eat outside if the weather’s agreeable.

When we have kitchen facilities, we make simple side dishes like rice, pasta, cous cous, quinoa, potatoes, steamed veggies, or boil frozen beans. If ovens are available, casseroles are easy for any meal. We just buy disposable aluminum pans. We don’t ordinarily use aluminum for cooking, but it’s ok for occasional use. We simplify and cut corners where it’s not a big deal.

We don’t eat much differently in TLF than at home during summer: grilled meats, veggies either steamed or sauteed, a grain side like cous cous, potatoes, quinoa, rice.

I can still rock a healthy home-cooked meal in #TLF
A photo posted by Jennifer at Royal Little Lambs (@jenalambert) on Apr 27, 2014 at 5:05pm PDT

We try to use up everything so there’s no waste.

Lat night in #tlf means we use up as much food as we can: roasted balsamic chicken thighs and wild rice with Parmesan, sautéed mushrooms, and steamed veggies.
A photo posted by Jennifer at Royal Little Lambs (@jenalambert) on Apr 29, 2014 at 4:55pm PDT

We’ve even baked chocolate chip cookie bars and quick breads in TLF in disposable aluminum pans.

Picnics are easy and frugal for road trips or easy for lunches at any point during the PCS.

We packed up sandwiches, chips, and juice for our road trip from Utah to Georgia and stopped at rest stops to eat and play.

My Top Twelve Easy Dinners for PCS or Travel:

Pizza.
We love to make our own pizza!
Hamburgers.
These are always a favorite!
Casseroles.
Turkey Divan and Tuna Casserole are favorites.
Grilled or Roasted Meat and easy sides.
We love cous cous or quinoa with a marinated meat and a veggie.
Tacos.
See our homemade taco seasoning.
Stews.
Beef stew and chili are easy stovetop or slow cooker meals.
Roasts.
I like to roast a beef chuck or pork loin or whole chicken and have leftovers the next day! I often throw some root veggies alongside.
Slow cooker meals.
We love Asian pork ribs and salsa chicken.
Breakfast for dinner.
My husband usually is in charge of this.
Sandwiches.
This is fun for picnics.
Salads.
We like to use leftovers for creative salads.
Soups.
Here are a few of our favorite soups!

It’s stressful not having our kitchenware and having to eat on the run with little planning.

We stay flexible and look forward to learning our way around a new kitchen and organizing it the way we like it.

Do you have any PCS tips?

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PCS While Homeschooling

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November 2, 2015 By Jennifer 2 Comments

I see this question a lot:

What is the bare minimum amount of homeschool material to take when we PCS in the middle of a school year?

We usually PCS at the end of summer.

We have been left in the lurch a couple times when we didn’t receive our HHG until after all the homeschool group activities and co-op classes began. I never know if things are going to begin in July, August, or September in a new location!

Here is what we did when we PCSed in April, road tripped from Utah to Georgia, then flew to Germany – over a two-month period.

My kids were 4, 7, 8, and 13.

We don’t use a lot of electronics. We focus on history and literature.

We hadn’t completed our studies yet for the year so we packed much of it up to take with us, especially since we had some long stretches of time in TLF in Utah on the leaving end and in Germany on the coming end.

We want to limit weight and bulk while bringing as much as we can carry!

We certainly wanted to keep up the basics – The Three R’s:

Reading, wRiting, and aRithmetic!

The kids each had a large backpack with their school things and personal items likes toys and coloring pages.

I loaded up eBooks on the kids’ (and my) iPad minis with the Kindle app. Our first priority was to get library cards at our new location!

My girls had journals to write down and draw about their experiences as we traveled. I also printed fun pages about the places we saw on our trip. They also packed their Logic of English workbooks.

I packed up the kids’ Singapore math workbooks, which fortunately are very lightweight.

Liz was doing Videotext Algebra, so we did work whenever she could get online to view a lesson. I printed some of the worksheets she needed and then emailed more to my husband to print.

I packed Alex’s All About Reading materials with a tiny dry erase board. It was probably the bulkiest item we brought on the trip, but it was worth it to keep him on schedule.

That little dry erase board came in handy for lessons with all the kids!

We did art projects on the fly!

See our Star Wars Angry Birds.

The girls also packed their science and notebooking journals.

I also brought along our worldview book since we hadn’t finished it and I just couldn’t bear to pack it up (and we were reviewing it!). That came in handy for read-aloud time to a captive audience in the car!

Another option if you have an address for the location you’re PCSing to, is to have some homeschool items mailed there early so it’s waiting upon your arrival.

What do you do when you PCS or move during the homeschool year?

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Challenges for Military Families Overseas

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October 13, 2015 By Jennifer Leave a Comment

While I am very thankful to be so fortunate to live overseas, it’s not always magical and fun.

We are a military family and these are some challenges to our daily lives.

Personal freedom

While I was raised in a military family, it’s quite eye-opening to be a military family in a foreign country.

For personal safety, we are advised to remove stickers and emblems from our personal vehicles that could identify us as American.

My husband cannot wear his uniform off base. My daughter cannot wear her Civil Air Patrol uniform off base.

We don’t wear American sports or brand-ID clothing off base either.

We do our best to blend in.

So many Americans live in a bubble of ignorance and arrogance and protection in the big ole US of A, but getting unbiased news reports opens our eyes a bit here.

Postal service

We receive an APO mailbox that is located in my husband’s building. I can mail items through that office at US postal prices to US mailing addresses.

For receiving items, I have two choices:

When I place an online order, I can ship to my APO which is like a US postal address, but there are often long wait times. Items can be expedited for additional shipping charges. Sometimes, a company won’t ship an item to an APO. I have had to cut down my blog reviews for many items won’t ship here in a timely fashion or at all. Some stores often ship the cheapest way, which means on a boat and I could see the item in a couple months, maybe.

I can order locally and have items shipped to my home address. There are not so many items available to order here as in the USA and free shipping is not as common.

Internet and TV

This was the biggest shock to me.

We put our TV in storage rather than ship it with our household goods since it wasn’t something we wanted to pay for here. There are taxes and signal boxes that must be purchases and we don’t watch that mutch TV anyway.

It took 6 months to get Internet connected to our house. While we have the fastest connection of anyone we know, it is DSL and the bandwidth is shared among the neighbors in our village. So, in the evenings, it is rather slow and glitchy.

We use a VPN to connect to Amazon streaming and Netflix so we can watch movies and shows on our computers.

Paying for Stuff

We have US bank accounts that service military families. The clerks we contact with questions or problems don’t seem to understand that the rest of the world utilizes pin and chip cards for payment. Our non-chip check cards are seldom accepted at local stores and hardly ever when we travel, so we have to use ATMs for Euro cash before we leave. We’ve been having trouble using our check cards at the couple of local places that do take them as payment. Our bank tells us the company that issues the check cards have fraud alerts for any credit purchases over $50. We have called and spoken to the bank several times and argued to have the fraud alerts lifted. We have explained we need pin and chip cards. We have explained that we live in Germany and the stores only have machines that run check cards like credit cards. It’s so embarrassing to be at Globus or Real and ring up €130 in groceries to have our card denied. Shopping here can be challenging.

And then there’s the exchange rate that’s 24% higher on-base than off-base. The government justifies this as a convenience charge.

There are a few options for paying local utility bills since we live off-base. We have two banks on-base: Community Bank, run by Bank of America (and a completely different banking entity), and Service Credit Union. There are offices in the KMCC mall and several other convenient locations around the KMC military installations. Many ATMs are easily found on bases too. These banks communicate with local vendors and offer payments in Euro and USD. We opened a Community Bank account to pay rent, utilities, Internet, and cell phones. There is a $1 surcharge+exchange rate fees for online bill pay transactions. Many choose to get a completely local German bank to avoid all the extra fees. This is handy for those fluent in German or married to a local national. I wish we had researched and figured this out before banking with Community Bank.

Electricity

American electic outlets are 110V. Most European electric outlets are 220V.

While we use transformers for some of our must-have kitchen appliances and adaptors for things like lamps, we have to be very careful with electricity here. It’s more expensive than what we’re used to paying. The electric company charges an average fee each month and then reconciles each year. We owed a lot last year, so we asked for our average to be raised accordingly so we’re not surprised again. We use our dishwasher and washer and dryer every day, often multiple times per day. We hang our clothing to dry, but I do put towels and underwear in the condenser dryer.

We put all of our 110V appliances with timers in storage. We also put our big freezer in storage. I have purchased a few items new or used to make our time here more enjoyable. I figure the amount of use we will get out of a Crock Pot and hair dryer for 3-4 years is worth it!

Gasoline

We receive a gasoline or petrol ration each month.

There are several gas stations on the bases near us. They list the price per gallon that is comparable to prices in the US, but it issues gas in liters. We sign for our ration and then we pay in American dollars.

When our van arrived, one of the first things we had to do was register it in the system for our petrol ration. When my husband bought a car, we had to transfer the registration and ration card.

When we travel, we can load the Esso card and use it at Esso stations throughout Germany, as long as it is within our monthly ration.

Kids

Our children mostly adjust well to the military life.

Our teen has the hardest time being flexible. I know it’s hard sometimes. She has less freedom as an ex-pat here in Europe than she would in the States.

While many of her friends in the USA are getting learner’s permits at 15, Liz knows she can’t drive a car in Europe until the age of 18. Since we live (pretty far) off-base, she has to rely on her parents (us) to drive her to activities.

She isn’t able to get a part-time job off-base and almost all the base jobs require applicants to be 18+. She is vying for entry-level experience with military spouses who need the money or are bored or want to work (they can’t get any off-base jobs either).

Most of the volunteer opportunities in the local community are even closed to her since she is a minor. The USO doesn’t accept minors anymore here in our area because of some bad occurences that happened years ago.

Liz got her Red Cross certification at age 15 so she earns credit for her hospital volunteering.

Too many families want babysitters who are adults and have their own car. And they don’t want to pay. We used to pay $10-15/hour for our 3 girls, but most of the babysitting jobs Liz has done this past year were for $5/hour for 2-4 kids, and some with special needs! Liz is a certified babysitter with the Red Cross – CPR and more, and has lots of experience with special needs kids – autism, deafness, FAS.

Our other kids haven’t had too many problems with military life other than leaving friends when we or they PCS.

We’re here…

I love seeing family and friends post momentous occasions on social media. I laugh and cry with you. I am proud to witness your kids’ growth and family events. But it also makes me a little sad. We miss the church campouts and friendly BBQs. My husband misses fishing with his friends. My kids miss playing in the yard.

Holidays are hard.

It’s hard feeling isolated and alone sometimes.

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