Submission

I think Christian women love to attack each other over the discussion of Biblical submission. Because that’s what Jesus wants, right? That holier than thou attitude.

Yep, I sure know what the Bible says and I’ll bet you do too.

Different denominations seem to have all sorts of doctrines and teach different aspects of how they interpret it. I’ve been damaged by some of those interpretations and some would consider that spiritual abuse or something. Whatev.

Since I didn’t grow up in church or knowing Biblical teachings, I had to seek God, read the Bible for myself, and discuss with my husband what we wanted for our family. The extremist position of no makeup, long skirts and uncut hair didn’t appeal to my husband, who grew up Presbyterian. Yay for that, because it’s quite a bit much for me. And most of those women I’ve encountered shun our family, and that’s real Christian. Cuz appearances matter so much, right?

Before any fundamentalists start attacking me, my husband delegates all household and homeschool decisions to me. When I get overwhelmed, I consult him to help balance it back on out. It works for us and therefore we are obedient to God. I submit to his delegation and he understands my strengths as a leader in our home. My husband desires that I make home decisions and he trusts me.

I, on the other hand, have issues with trust and respect. My past makes trusting hard for me. I have issues with forgiveness too. We’re working through all this. I don’t think any married couple has perfection, certainly not within the first ten years or so. Yep, I’ve read those books on love and respect. They help some. But reading isn’t doing. I’m working on the doing.

Here’s a comment on a great lesson I learned from a Jewish friend. Read it for what it was for me at the time.

Here are some articles I wrote about trust issues: part one and part two. Please notice they’re from a couple years ago. I’ve grown some since.

But it’s still a struggle, almost daily. I suffer from wife guilt. I react out of my past experiences and I take out my problems on my innocent husband.

Yes, I pray and work through these issues, and I often fail. I am thankful for God’s grace and my husband’s constant forgiveness.