How do you teach motivation?
What do you do with that difficult child? The one who will have her own way. No matter what.
We learned long ago we can’t make our kids do anything they don’t desire to do.
I let it go.
I want a relationship with my children. I don’t want to be a taskmaster. I want them to think for themselves, make wise decisions…not rely on fear as a motivator.
It’s not my job to teach motivation. It’s between them and God. I can only guide.
I appeal to you therefore, brothers, by the mercies of God, to present your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and acceptable to God, which is your spiritual worship. Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect. Romans 12:1-2
Real success is not what the world would teach us.
I’ve learned to pray – earnestly, unceasingly.
As my children grow up into tweens and teens, our relationship changes, expands…
They’re growing up and will make their own choices. I am more a counselor, a coach, as I watch them learn to fly, struggling with the wind.
They come back to rest and ask questions and learn.
Dinner conversations – after the little ones run off to play – turn to sex, drugs, the media, politics, all the evils in the world. I want them to “be wise as a serpent and innocent as a dove.”
I pray that they will be discerning, successful in their endeavors, and that they are led by God to become the woman or man He wants them to be.
And I pray their paths will be easier than mine.
Parenting a teen is hard and the world tells us it’s all but impossible.
I taught high school English and I saw too many teens fall away to the world, parents oblivious or at a loss as to what to do. I watched on the sidelines, helpless, vowing I would do differently.
I will stand firm and fight this fight. And I will win with God at my side.
I say: nothing is impossible with God.
He will redeem every hurt and heal the wounds our words and actions cause.
He is the God of reconciliation.
Jesus told his disciples, “If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross and follow me. For whoever would save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for my sake will find it. For what will it profit a man if he gains the whole world and forfeits his soul? Or what shall a man give in return for his soul? For the Son of Man is going to come with his angels in the glory of his Father, and then he will repay each person according to what he has done. Truly, I say to you, there are some standing here who will not taste death until they see the Son of Man coming in his kingdom.” Matthew 16:24-28
And when I pray for success, I don’t pray for the success the world teaches. I pray for Kingdom Success. I want my children to love Jesus and their neighbor. I want them to shine their light for Him. I want them to live for Him.
I don’t care if my children join the military, become an astronaut, never go to college, become a restaurant server or garbage collector, as long as they do their best and do it to the glory of God.
I don’t care if they never marry.
I don’t care who they love as long as they are loved.
The pressures of the world are often too much, causing depression and anxiety. We live counter-culturally and it is so, so hard. We’re tired to explaining to deaf ears and blind eyes.
I pray for my kids to discover and learn to use their spiritual gifts, to find their purpose.
I pray my children are global, mission-minded, socially conscious, world changers, servant leaders.
I let go of my desires for them as I allow Him to guide them into who they are supposed to be.
Of course, I want them to be happy and loving and kind.
Having a child who grows up to love Jesus is real success.
Nita says
Amen! Like you, I pray that my child will grow up to be a child of God and live his life through him. Admittedly, I do find it hard to let go, but I know this is the only way and I pray that God gives me the strength to carry this through. #TwinklyTuesday
Mary Geisen says
Parenting is an amazing gift that brings such joy and even more heartache somedays. But releasing our kids to God is the best thing we can do. I love how you shared your heart and supported it with scripture. God loves nothing more than to hear and answer our prayers in his perfect timing. Blessed to be your neighbor at Tea and Word today.
Jennifer says
The release is hard but necessary.
Debbie Putman says
Parenting brings such joys and such challenges. Letting go was easier when I remembered God loves my girls more than I do.
Jennifer says
Isn’t that amazing to realize?
Jessi's Design says
Amen! I totally agree!
Anita Ojeda says
Amen! Sometimes, that transition from teen to adult takes time and has so many more bumps than just the teen years :/ . But when we surrender our children to God, he will help them (and us), grow into who he wants them to be!
Jennifer says
In the end, after all the heart-ache, ups and downs, you nailed it, what really matters is that our children grow up to love Jesus; God has proven Himself faithful time and time again with my husband and me regarding our adult children, train up a child in the way he should and he shall not depart from it {my words}; it is true, they do come back.
I am your neighbor today at Heart Encouragement link up. God bless you, and your family.
Jennifer says
Amen!
Leslie says
Jennifer, thank you for this reminder of how powerful prayer is! (And letting go, too! That’s the hard part!)
April J Harris says
What a wonderful post! It’s true, success is defined in many ways, and true success is never worldly success. Praying for our children is so important. Thank you so much for sharing this important post with us a the Hearth and Soul Link Party, Jennifer. Have a blessed weekend!
Lisa (mummascribbles) says
I just love the way you look at parenting. I reckon your kids definitely think you are the cool mum! Thanks for linking up with #TwinklyTuesday
Jennifer says
Thanks!
Tina at Mommynificent says
Thank you for sharing this at Booknificent Thursday on Mommynificent.com! Pinned.
Tina