Jennifer Lambert

A Sacred Balance

Visit Us On FacebookVisit Us On PinterestVisit Us On InstagramVisit Us On Linkedin

Blue Christmas

This blog may contain affiliate links: disclosure.
Please see my suggested resources.

By 16 Comments

I led a Longest Night Service on Winter Solstice at my church one year.

Blessed are those who mourn,
for they will be comforted. Matthew 5:4

The Longest Night Service or Blue Christmas is held on the Winter Solstice to temper the struggle with darkness and grief faced by those living with loss, separation, or illness. The service coincides with the traditional feast day for Saint Thomas the Apostle.

Jesus said, “Come unto me all you who labor and are heavy laden and I will give you rest.” Matthew 11:28

And so we invite each other to this time of peaceful worship.  Flee for a while from your tasks.  Hide yourself for a little space from the turmoil of your thoughts.  Come, cast aside your burdensome cares and put aside your laborious pursuits.  Give your time to God, and rest in God for a little while.

Much of the liturgy I borrowed from a pdf I found online from Palo Cristi Presbyterian Church. I already have ideas for next year!

It was a calm, quiet, casual service. No standing, no greeting. No wishing anyone “Merry Christmas.”

The lights were dim.

About 25 people worshiped together on the longest night of the year.

Our pastor welcomed everyone.

Her husband played guitar.

Our music director played piano.

My middle daughters were acolytes and lit the altar candles.

A poem, First Coming by Madeleine L’Engle:

He did not wait till the world was ready,
till men and nations were at peace.
He came when the Heavens were unsteady,
and prisoners cried out for release.

He did not wait for the perfect time.
He came when the need was deep and great.
He dined with sinners in all their grime,
turned water into wine. He did not wait

till hearts were pure. In joy he came
to a tarnished world of sin and doubt.
To a world like ours, of anguished shame
he came, and his Light would not go out.

He came to a world which did not mesh,
to heal its tangles, shield its scorn.
In the mystery of the Word made Flesh
the Maker of the stars was born.

We cannot wait till the world is sane
to raise our songs with joyful voice,
for to share our grief, to touch our pain,
He came with Love: Rejoice! Rejoice!

HYMN: It Came Upon a Midnight Clear 

CLAIMING A PLACE OF SAFETY

One:  This night is ours.

All:  Here we find refuge from bright lights, holiday songs, celebrations, and the expectations of everyone around us.

One:  In this safe place, we can admit our pain, our loss, our fears, and no one will judge us.

All:  No one will tell us to be happy or merry.  No one will think less of us because we cannot celebrate this season.   Above all, no one will find our tears inconvenient or inappropriate.

One:  Here, we can pour our hearts out honestly and claim our own kind of meaning from this season.

All:  Here, we are welcome even if we’re cynical, even if we’re angry, even if we scoff at the mention of hope and meaning.

One:  Tonight, we can be where we are.  We do not need to hide or pretend or feel guilty, even if our grief, our pain, our anger seems ugly to the world.

All:  We can release our need to please others and be ourselves.

One:  Let us be at peace.

All:  We are safe here.  We are accepted here.  There are no demands. 

One:  Let us be sanctuary for one another.

All:  We say to each other: Lay your burdens here.  Cast your sorrows into the circle of light.  Bask in the warmth that is life.

One:  We say to each other: There is more to life than pain.  There is more to life than sorrow.  Wait for it. Watch for it. Welcome it.

This evening we confess that we are profoundly in need of God’s mercy, so let us sing “Kyrie Eleison,” the Greek words meaning “Lord, have mercy.”

SUNG CONFESSION: Kyrie Eleison

RESPONSIVE PRAYER

One:  Signs of celebration surround us.

All:  What can we celebrate?

One:  Here.  Now.  We can only celebrate and embrace this moment.  This breath.  Even if it hurts.

All:  There is breath.  There is life.  Each new moment we breathe this air, there is hope of unexpected comfort, joy, and love.

One:  We are precious.  Every breath we take is significant and a victory.  Our being and Our lives are the greatest and most irreplaceable treasure.

All:  Even when life is filled with pain, it is a miracle worthy of awe and reverence.

One:  There is a miracle to celebrate on this dark and quiet night.  It is within us.

All:  Our eyes see the stars of the night sky.  Our lips form words of comfort and truth.  Our feet carry us where we bid them.  Our backs bear our burdens until we can put them down.   Each courageous act is a triumph.

One:  We are privileged to live out our lives surrounded by everyday wonders:

All:  Trees and their dappled shade, birds and their varied songs, blue skies and changing clouds;

One:  Thunderstorms and sea breezes, mugs of hot coffee or tea, music, afternoon naps,

All:  hot baths and hot showers, good-smelling soaps,

One:  the Milky Way, and warm smiles from strangers,

All:  And every day the pale creeping dawn signals new beginning.  Each day the commonplace is miraculous.

One:  We are not alone.  Isolation is a myth and a lie.

All:  There are thousands of people, hundreds of thousands of people, who tonight are one with us in our questions and doubts. 

One:  Some are in this room.  Some we cannot see or touch.  But the human bond is there nonetheless.

All:  Hundreds of thousands of people whose simple existence makes each of us stronger,

One:  A human community where we can comfort and serve each other.

All:  Even in the face of sorrow we can find sources of hope and reasons to rejoice we can share that hope and that joy with each other. 

One:  We can put our arms around each other in unity and understanding.

All:  We are not alone. 

GATHERING HYMN: Wait for the Lord by Taizé

SCRIPTURE READINGS

Two of our church leaders and my teen daughter read these.

Luke 14:15-24: This story offers hope for those who have no one to invite them. It reminds us that in God’s divine order, no one is excluded-all are invited.

Matthew 11:28-29: When burdens get piled on top of other burdens, the load can crush us. In his promise, Jesus offers us help to carry our burdens and responsibilities.

Revelation 7:15-17: Our present world is not how God wants things to be. Those who weep now will not weep later. In this new heaven and new earth, there will be no more need for tears.

HYMN: O Come, Emmanuel #123

CANDLELIGHTING

My four children did this part so beautifully.

We light four candles tonight. We light one for our grief, one for our courage, one for our memories, and one for our love.

Reader 1: This candle represents our grief. We own the pain of losing loved ones, of dreams that go unfulfilled, of hopes that evaporate in despair.

Reader 2: This candle represents our courage. It symbolizes the courage to confront our sorrow, to comfort each other, to share our feelings honestly and openly with each other, and to dare to hope in the midst of pain.

Reader 3: This candle represents our memories. For the times we laughed together, cried together, were angry with each other or overjoyed with each other. We light this candle for the memories of caring and joy we shared together.

Reader 4: This candle represents our love. The love we have given, and the love we have received. The love that has gone unacknowledged and unfelt, and the love that has been shared in times of joy and sorrow.

Leader: You are now invited to come forward to light one of the tealight candles which represents your burdens, griefs, sorrows, all those things that make Christmas a “blue” time for you.

Leader: We now light the Christ candle, remembering that Jesus Christ is always in the center of our lives. He hears our cries, he knows our hearts and, in the midst of all our thoughts and emotions, he offers us hope and healing.

PRAYER

Comforting God, wrap us in your presence in this time of remembrance.

With these candles, help us find your light, a light that will guide us day by day, step by step, as we try to live life fully and whole.

We cherish the special ways in which we have been touched by our loved ones.

We thank you for the gift their lives have been to us. Now comfort us, encourage us, and empower us. AMEN.

HYMN: In the Bleak Midwinter

HOMILY by Jennifer Lambert

I am a failure.

I’ve failed at so many things.

I’ve failed at school, at work, as a friend, as a wife, as a mom, in my community, as a Christian.

I imagine most people can relate to failing at some point.

During the holidays, many of us feel like a failure.

All the lights, music, decorations, events, celebrations are overwhelming.

It can make one’s mouth hurt to constantly speak with such forced merriment.

I don’t have Pinterest-worthy decorations. I get overwhelmed making homemade meals and treats all season-long. I can’t buy all the gifts for all the people on my list. It’s a comparison trap, looking over my shoulder, on social media at what others are doing, making, buying that seem better, more meaningful, more memorable.

I need more time, more energy, more money.

Or I do I need to just change my expectations?

Most failure is because of failed expectations.

Mary was a failure.

Mary was pregnant before her wedding to Joseph. In any time period, that is scandalous.

Her pregnancy was unexpected. She was an unexpected bride. She lived an unexpected life.

Did Mary feel like a failure as a wife?

She delivered her firstborn son in a stable. Suddenly, unexpectedly. Was she scared? Was she disappointed at those conditions?

She later witnessed her firstborn son ridiculed, beaten, crucified, dead, buried.

Did Mary feel like a failure as a mother?

Joseph was a failure.

Joseph wanted to quietly divorce Mary when he found out she was already pregnant and he knew he wasn’t the father. Joseph followed through after the angel commanded him to take Mary as his bride anyway.

Joseph traveled to Bethlehem with a very pregnant Mary for the census. He couldn’t find a room for her to stay in, much less to give birth in.

How uncomfortable must that journey have been? I’ve had 4 traumatic birth experiences, but in a stable?

Did Joseph panic?

Did Joseph feel ashamed?

He knowingly entered into a blended family.

Did Joseph feel like a failure as a husband and stepfather?

Jesus was a failure.

Born in a stable.

Exiled to Egypt.

Living in obscurity as a carpenter.

Rising as an unexpected leader.

Nathanael claimed: “Nothing good can come out of Nazareth.”

Jesus was supposed to rescue the Jews from the Romans. He wasn’t the king they were expecting.

The Jews rejected Jesus as the Messiah. Even though He fulfilled prophecy, Jesus’ radical teachings and ways were unexpected. He shook the bureaucracy.

Then Jesus was arrested, tortured, crucified, killed, buried.

He rose from the grave, but still they struggled to understand.

Jesus was a failure because He didn’t fulfill human expectations.

And yet He loves us because we know not what we do.

Who has seen the new Star Wars movie? No spoilers, but I love this line:

Failure is our greatest learning.

We can’t avoid failure. But what do we do with it? Do we mope and wallow in the negativity, beating ourselves up, refusing to try again?

We must learn from our failures.

When we are weak, He is strong. In our failure, He is magnified and glorified.

We must realize our potential,

practice peace,

and learn our purpose.

It’s one thing for others to see your potential. It’s quite another for you to understand and see potential in yourself.

We must have courage to fail and have peace with ourselves and others. We must forgive ourselves and others. We must learn to apologize and make amends to heal relationships with others. We have to learn to let go of hurts.

Growth is painful. We must pray to realize our purpose, even if it’s unexpected. We must stop striving to be someone else, listening to those inner voices telling us we’re not good enough. Looking ahead and planning is good, but let’s not lose sight of the blessings and opportunities right in front of us, in this moment.

Being a student is enough. Being a spouse is enough. Being a parent is enough.

You are enough.

Pray with me:

May God bless us with discomfort at half-truths, easy answers, and superficial relationships, so that we will live deeply and from the heart.

May God bless us with righteous anger at injustice, oppression, and the exploitation of people, so that we will work for justice, freedom, and peace.

May God bless us with tears to shed for those in pain, so that we will reach out our hands to them and turn their pain into joy.

And may God bless us with just enough foolishness to believe that we can make a difference in this old world, so that we will do those unexpected things that others say cannot be done.

Jesus Christ is the light of the world, the light no darkness can overcome.

Stay with us, Lord, for it is evening, and the day is almost over.

Let your light scatter the darkness and illumine your people. Amen.

LORICA OF ST. PATRICK

L:  I arise today
C:  Through a mighty strength, the invocation of the Trinity
Through belief in the threeness
Through confession of the Oneness
Towards the creator.

L:  I arise today
C:  Through God’s strength to pilot me:
God’s might to uphold me,
God’s wisdom to guide me
God’s eye to look before me,
God’s ear to hear me,
God’s word to speak for me,
God’s hand to guard me,
God’s way to lie before me,
God’s host to secure me.

L:  I arise today
C:  Through the strength of Christ with his baptism,
Through the strength of his crucifixion with his burial,
Through the strength of his resurrection with his ascension
Through the strength of his descent for the Judgment of doom.

L:  Christ with me, Christ before me, Christ behind me,
C:  Christ in me, Christ beneath me, Christ above me,
L:  Christ on my right, Christ on my left
C:  Christ where I lie, Christ where I sit, Christ where I arise
L:  Christ in the heart of everyone who thinks of me,
C:  Christ in the mouth of everyone who speaks of me,
L:  Christ in every eye that sees me,
C:  Christ in every ear that hears me.

L: Salvation is of the Lord
C: Salvation is of the Lord
L:  Salvation is of Christ
C:  May thy salvation, O Lord, be ever with us.

HYMN: Silent Night #147

BLESSING

One:  Let us face the trials of a bright season with an inner calm because we know there are deeper meanings.

All:  We have looked into the pool of suffering and we have not lost all hope.  Let that knowledge strengthen us.

One:  When we are overcome with despair, let us be glad of our improbable existence and be content to wait for the next moment and the possibility it brings for unexpected joy.

All:  For a little space of time, we have laid our burdens down.  For a little space of time, we have cast our sorrows into the circle of light.  For as long as we are able, we will bask in the warmth that is life.

One:  These candles will flutter and burn out sending the room into darkness, but our hearts contain a more powerful flame.

All:  In our hearts burns life, complex and difficult, in all its uniqueness and mystery.

One:  We carry hope into the world simply by carrying on, helping others, and living our lives as best we can.

All:  Even on the darkest nights when all we can do is curl up and weep, the ember of life is in us, burning intensely.

One:  That radiance is more brilliant than any holiday decoration; it is more enduring than any loss; it is a flame worth protecting, worth fighting for.

All:  Let us nurture that warmth and life in us. 

One:  Let us go into a cold winter night and warm its air even slightly with our breath as we go.  Let us pass from this safe place, knowing that we carry sanctuary in us. 

All:  In the coolness of the night, we will walk in peace.  In the quiet of the starlight, we will walk with hope.  In the company of all life, we will do our best to love.

One:  Go forth!  Breathe in the crisp air, feel your feet upon the earth, know you are in good company.  Nurture the ember that glows inside you, for it is robust and will give you strength.

All:  So be it.  So we will go.

Do you struggle during the holidays?

You might also like:

Resources:

Share
Pin122
Share
122 Shares
You might also like:

In the Middle

This blog may contain affiliate links: disclosure.
Please see my suggested resources.

By 17 Comments

What to do with that middle schooler…junior high girl…lost child… between childhood and adulthood?

Our society pushes these girls to grow up way too soon. We see the shocking scenes in the media that many in our society deem “normal.”

Young girls mimic this media and some are desensitized while others think it’s nothing to worry about.

And we still have the “boys will be boys” mentality in our western society.

There’s a double standard.

I say that it’s not normal and there’s no such thing as this Western adolescent mentality – other than the biological changes. And I’ve got an oil for that.

Why shouldn’t she still be that same sweet little girl who holds your hand while shopping and tells you her dreams before bed? Our society says that it’s acceptable and expected for tweens and teens to be belligerent and defiant. Why? It’s just another lie from the devil that divides families. And it’s starting younger and younger.

When I was a girl, we went from child to junior to adult clothing. There were no tween lines of clothing in stores encouraging girls to look older than they are. We should not have little girls wearing makeup and high heels and leather and making “come hither” looks at boys. It used to be just certain high-end clothing catalogs, but I’ve seen it recently in department store Sunday ad inserts. I’ve seen little girls in church wearing stripper clothes. It’s getting closer and closer to what everyone considers “normal.” My husband is disturbed by seeing girls when he can’t tell if they’re 12 or 25 in age. I wonder what high school and college boys think!

What will my son think?

What does Jesus think?

It’s about more than modesty.

Do we want our daughters to be sex symbols or admired for their minds, hearts, souls?

I often have to shop in the boys’ department for my daughters. They like to be comfortable and covered up. They don’t like the low waist super skinny jeans and short shorts. They don’t like leggings as pants. They like the wider longer cut of the Tshirts in the boys’ dept.

Even in the Christian world, we compromise values to fit in with the world. Society says to protect with vaccinations against STD’s and with contraceptive devices instead of discipling and educating in the Word. The devil and the world want us to think that’s it’s hopeless for anyone to wait until marriage to have sex.

And it’s not just about the act of sex. It’s about the intimacy, the tearing apart of a soul who is too young to understand what she’s doing to herself, what regrets she will have later.

God spoke to me recently through this song The Middle by Jimmy Eat World.

When I researched it, the video (while inappropriate for kids) is quite powerful about peer pressure.

So, what did God say to me?

I’m so glad you asked.

That gorgeous girl in the video with the cross necklace represents compromised Christians. These kids are lost. Their faith isn’t strong enough; their foundation is shaky; they are weak; they have no good Christian role models. They struggle with living in the world and can’t stand strong against the pressures to fit in.

…for Demas, because he loved this world, has deserted me… ~2 Timothy 4:10a

I knew girls like that when I was in school. I didn’t understand it, but I knew I wanted no part of it. Those “Sunday Christians” didn’t appeal to me, but I didn’t know why yet. They have that appearance of being Christian, but they go the way of the world.

For what is a man profited, if he shall gain the whole world, and lose his own soul? or what shall a man give in exchange for his soul? ~Matthew 16:26

God had His finger on me, but it was many years before I knew it.

Those two kids who almost compromise? They realize their potential mistake just in time and support one another. They have the victory.

I pray that our children can fight the temptations of this world and have the victory.

It begins at home with fervent prayer as parents.

I recently met a kindred spirit in an Air Force chaplain’s wife. Jean told me they have three wonderful children whom they successfully raised for the Lord. They just dropped off their youngest, a son, at his freshman dorm to begin college. They are officially empty nesters. Their daughters, aged 25 and 23, are still virgins and are engaged to be married (or so close they can taste it) to wonderful Christian young men. Praise God for that testimony as a mama!

It is possible! I pray that I have that kind of success raising my children to further the Kingdom of God.

Who do you want teaching your kids about sex?

Culture? School? Lady Gaga? Miley Cyrus? Their friends? Do you trust your church to teach them?

Or you as a parent?

I know which I choose.

Yes, it’s hard!

I choose to teach my children about relationships.

Is it time for THE TALK?

Having THE TALK.

We don’t teach PURITY.

I actively teach my young son to respect me, his sisters, and all other females. It’s not enough to wait until he’s a teen and has been influenced by so many others.

Resources for Discipling Daughters:

“Clowns to the left of me,
Jokers to the right, here I am,
Stuck in the middle with you…”

Be strong.

Share
Pin11
Share
11 Shares
You might also like:

Praying for Success

This blog may contain affiliate links: disclosure.
Please see my suggested resources.

By 15 Comments

How do you teach motivation?

What do you do with that difficult child? The one who will have her own way. No matter what.

We learned long ago we can’t make our kids do anything they don’t desire to do.

I let it go.

I want a relationship with my children. I don’t want to be a taskmaster. I want them to think for themselves, make wise decisions…not rely on fear as a motivator.

It’s not my job to teach motivation. It’s between them and God. I can only guide.

 I appeal to you therefore, brothers, by the mercies of God, to present your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and acceptable to God, which is your spiritual worship. Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect. Romans 12:1-2

Real success is not what the world would teach us.

I’ve learned to pray – earnestly, unceasingly.

As my children grow up into tweens and teens, our relationship changes, expands…

They’re growing up and will make their own choices. I am more a counselor, a coach, as I watch them learn to fly, struggling with the wind.

They come back to rest and ask questions and learn.

Dinner conversations – after the little ones run off to play – turn to sex, drugs, the media, politics, all the evils in the world. I want them to “be wise as a serpent and innocent as a dove.”

I pray that they will be discerning, successful in their endeavors, and that they are led by God to become the woman or man He wants them to be.

And I pray their paths will be easier than mine.

Parenting a teen is hard and the world tells us it’s all but impossible.

I taught high school English and I saw too many teens fall away to the world, parents oblivious or at a loss as to what to do. I watched on the sidelines, helpless, vowing I would do differently.

I will stand firm and fight this fight. And I will win with God at my side.

I say: nothing is impossible with God.

He will redeem every hurt and heal the wounds our words and actions cause.

He is the God of reconciliation.

 Jesus told his disciples, “If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross and follow me. For whoever would save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for my sake will find it. For what will it profit a man if he gains the whole world and forfeits his soul? Or what shall a man give in return for his soul? For the Son of Man is going to come with his angels in the glory of his Father, and then he will repay each person according to what he has done. Truly, I say to you, there are some standing here who will not taste death until they see the Son of Man coming in his kingdom.” Matthew 16:24-28

And when I pray for success, I don’t pray for the success the world teaches. I pray for Kingdom Success. I want my children to love Jesus and their neighbor. I want them to shine their light for Him. I want them to live for Him.

I don’t care if my children join the military, become an astronaut, never go to college, become a restaurant server or garbage collector, as long as they do their best and do it to the glory of God.

I don’t care if they never marry.

I don’t care who they love as long as they are loved.

The pressures of the world are often too much, causing depression and anxiety. We live counter-culturally and it is so, so hard. We’re tired to explaining to deaf ears and blind eyes.

I pray for my kids to discover and learn to use their spiritual gifts, to find their purpose.

I pray my children are global, mission-minded, socially conscious, world changers, servant leaders.

I let go of my desires for them as I allow Him to guide them into who they are supposed to be.

Of course, I want them to be happy and loving and kind.

Having a child who grows up to love Jesus is real success.


Share
Pin19
Share
19 Shares
You might also like:

How Journaling Helps Me

This blog may contain affiliate links: disclosure.
Please see my suggested resources.

By 18 Comments

I’m not into planners with all the stickers and the colored pens and the frills and stuff. It just seems like a big waste of my time.

But I frequently do informal journaling. I don’t feel the pressure to draw in a smashbook or place any stickers in a planner. Having something fancy is just overwhelming.

Journaling is a great way to be cognitive of little successes.

I’m always writing.

I keep a food and exercise journal on my smartphone.

I make notes for future blog posts in several places.

But this past year, and especially this past winter, I’ve gotten lazy and sedentary.

Some days, I look back and it feels like I did virtually nothing.

I recently began journaling my days to realize how much I do accomplish.

I don’t write down every little bitty thing, but I sketch out my day so I can look back and see what I did, because some days, it feels like I just watched Netflix all day.

I have just plain little spiral notebooks for my daily journal.

I read and write a lot.

And sometimes, it feels like I spend most of my time in the kitchen – prepping, cooking, and cleaning.

I was sick for a week, so I didn’t actually do so much. I needed to really rest and recharge. There wasn’t much to write about.

Then, I got back into gear.

Most of these aren’t great accomplishments by most standards, but they help me to feel better about how I spend my days.

I try to be peaceful and use my time wisely.

I don’t like to be busy or rushing. I like to move in easy rhythms with the seasons and holidays.

I love the daily examen from St. Ignatius:

1. Become aware of God’s presence.
2. Review the day with gratitude.
3. Pay attention to your emotions.
4. Choose one feature of the day and focus prayer around it.
5. Look toward tomorrow.

Download an Examen prayer card here.

I have some simple daily goals:

I want to read, exercise, complete lessons and read alouds and Bible study with my kids.

I also have a prayer journal.

I write scripture every day with monthly themed plans from Sweet Blessings.

I write prayers and praises – with dates so I can go back and look at it.

I write my exercises and travel experiences.

I recently got a recipe journal to track our favorite meals since I always tweak the recipes and forget.

Journaling is a great way to relax and keep track of events, milestones, thoughts, dreams…

Make a list of things you do every day.

Make a list of things that make you happy.

Compare the lists.

Adjust accordingly.

How journaling helps me:

  • Stress relief – it helps me to stay peaceful.
  • Personal growth – it helps me to learn about myself.
  • Helps clarify my thoughts and emotions – it helps me to work out issues with my past and present.
  • Problem solving – it helps me to be metacognitive.
  • Purge emotions – I can write about troublesome issues privately.

A Baker’s Dozen Reasons to Journal:

  1. Exercise log
  2. Foods you’ve eaten, especially to rule out allergies or sensitivities, or to save favorite recipes
  3. Quotes you love
  4. Travel
  5. Art
  6. Nature
  7. Poetry
  8. Books you’ve read or want to read
  9. Movies you’ve watched or want to watch
  10. Memories
  11. Wines or beers you’ve loved
  12. Daybook or daily log
  13. Prayer and/or Scripture

Do you journal? How does it help you?


Share
Pin23
Share
23 Shares
You might also like:

Empty Hands Hold Miracles

This blog may contain affiliate links: disclosure.
Please see my suggested resources.

By 14 Comments

We don’t really do a “back to school” since we “do school” year-round. It’s rather anticlimactic; there’s little to break the rhythm of lessons, meals, and constant chores. We have a lifestyle of learning and we certainly take frequent breaks when needed, like during travel or PCS, and for holidays . . . but if we take too much time off, there is boredom.

But there is also burnout.

I get tired and irritable and selfish.

I start to focus on impossibilities.

But we serve a God of possibilities.

Not having any time alone gets wearisome. I’m an INTJ and crave alone time. I start to fantasize about exotic vacations, trips to the bathroom alone even.

Just when I’m at my wits’ end, God shows up in the most unexpected places: Facebook statuses, blog posts, a sermon with a guest speaker, in my kids’ random and violent bear hugs that all but bruise my innards.

I have this amazing family around me, constantly. They’re right there in front of me, gazing expectantly with wide, long-lashed eyes.

I can *whoof* out their candles with a sharp word or thoughtless expression . . . or I can nurture those shy little flames of hope into blazing wildfires for the Kingdom.

When I start to desire to send them away – to play outside, to their rooms – do I stay selfish and go with my feelings? Or do I minister to my family, with God’s help?

And I realize my hands aren’t empty. It’s not so much that my hands are all that important. What I hold in my hands at any given moment can be miraculous if given Power. And it’s not as if the screen I bleed onto should have that much sway over my life.

The rod in Moses’ hands parted the seas. The slingshot in David’s hands destroyed the giant. The fishes and loaves in Jesus’ gentle hands multiplied and fed the multitudes with leftovers.

When I truly empty my hands . . . when I put down the iPhone or iPad, stop typing on the keyboard, quit stirring the pot, let that dirty dish sit in the sink, allow that stinky sock to go another hour or day…

God can use my hands for His glory.

Empty hands can hold miracles.

I can hold a book while they snuggle {too} near for read alouds.

I can fold my hands and pray with and for each of them.

I can hold their little hands in mine as we thank God for all the many blessings in our family circle.

I can caress that soft blonde curl behind her ear while I gently instruct a difficult math lesson.

I can wipe away the tear from the embarrassment of that mistake. Again.

I can envelop him in a big hug.

I can teach her how to knead the bread dough just so.

I can guide her fingers into the scissors to cut out the pattern.

I can lift up she who has fallen.

When I hold my children in my hands, I am touching the miraculous. I am glimpsing God.

Who knows what they will do for the Kingdom?

I can be the hands of Jesus to my children.

What’s in your hands?

It’s all about trust, control, acceptance.

If I can’t accept love, how can I offer it?

If I continue to thirst and hunger, how can I lead my little ones to the Living Water?

We have nothing to give others without giving first to Jesus. He gives through us.

He’s writing stories through us.

In the end, we’ll all become stories. We, as moms, have great and terrible influence over the stories our children write for themselves.

Share
Pin26
Share
26 Shares
You might also like:

We Stopped Going to Church

This blog may contain affiliate links: disclosure.
Please see my suggested resources.

By 132 Comments

We haven’t gone to church in a long time.

We didn’t have a lot of choices for English-speaking churches in Germany.

There’s the military base chapel, which is pretty vanilla since they have to cater to a broad audience and abide by military rules.

There are a few charismatic churches that just don’t appeal to us.

There are a few very conservative churches that are legalistic and cliquish.

I don’t want a rock and roll, laser show kind of church and it’s unfortunate that so many rely on these churchtainment distractions to get people through their doors.

We had attended a small general Lutheran congregation for the past year or so. Service began at 8:30 in the morning. Do you realize how hard it is to get everyone up, eat breakfast, get dressed, and out the door to drive 20+ minutes to church by 8:30 AM? We did it though. We went to bed early on Saturday nights in order to get up early for church.

I loved walking in ancient cathedrals in Europe and oohing and aahing at the magnificent architecture, cold smell of well-worn stone, beautiful and sometimes funny statues, chapel nooks – the sacred. And occasionally, there would be a mass and I could sit in a corner and just observe worship. I even understood some of it – the Latin, French, Italian. I always love the organ music.

Americans and Protestants don’t appreciate the sacred.

We recently moved back to the States and I don’t have great hopes of finding a church where we’ll fit in.

Before writing this, I researched “Why Should I Attend Church“? Many of the answers were interesting and even shocking to me. I expect the typical “Because the Bible says so” answer, but “Because you’re single and may meet someone” takes the cake.

I expect more.

I won’t lose my salvation. I still love Jesus.

I realize many will think I’m selfish for not dragging my family to church.

I do feel selfish.

We missed Easter. But I don’t like how most American churches celebrate Easter.

After many years of trying to discover God in church, I’ve just had enough. I need a break.

I need a break from Christians.

I can worship God – in the forest, at the beach, in a museum, while reading, while cleaning, while cooking, during meals, at the movies, listening to my children.

I am amazed by His creation and by people’s creativity, love, and kindness.

I don’t like church.

I’m a leader. I’m a teacher. I’m a counselor. I’m a researcher.

It’s hard for me to just sit back and be lectured to, read to, talked at…It’s especially hard for me to keep my mouth shut when the pastor, teacher, deacon, elder, leader, board member expresses false doctrine. It’s exhausting holding it all in because it doesn’t seem to ever matter anyway.

As an introvert, I don’t like fellowship time, potlucks, events, programs, meetings, VBS, AWANA, or Wednesday night service. I shouldn’t have to apologize for my personal preferences. I’ve suffered for years so my family can participate and seem normal.

I think too many churches and church leaders allow and perpetuate abuse – of women, children, people of color, LGBTQ+, others on the fringe of society and the evangelical system.

It’s very unpopular to love Jesus and not attend church.

But I think faith is a private thing between me and God. I shouldn’t have to explain my reasons to anyone.

We stopped going to church for a variety of reasons:

Poor Leadership

The German American pastor moved away to another calling. The American interim pastor and his wife were less than welcoming. They are micromanagers. They are exclusionists of anybody who isn’t LCMS-conservative.

When we attended an American PCUSA church in Ohio, we quickly learned how they compromise and downplay the importance of social justice. They’re more about pew-warming, excluding outsiders, and pacifying their suburban elderly rich white congregation than doing God’s work.

I had concerns about the pastor how her marriage seemed abusive. Her spouse called her stupid and dummy. They perpetuated white supremacy in their belief that veganism would save the world as Biblical mandate, refusing to accept any traditional indigenous dietary habits, poverty and food scarcity issues, allergy restrictions, or anything that could refute their intellectual belief.

Moral Failure

My young son’s teenage Sunday school teacher was in a sexual relationship with his girlfriend and this was apparently well-known and accepted by his and her parents, the homeschool community, and other church members. I was glad when he and his family moved away so I didn’t have to confront anyone. I am not a prude, but I didn’t feel it was appropriate behavior for a teen church leader. It’s one thing for consenting adults to have an intimate relationship; it’s another for teens to be all over each other in the pews.

I have seen lots of abuse from adult church leaders swept under the rug. Embezzlement and sexual abuse…to gossip and bullying.

Don’t even get me started on the purity movement and Christian pseudo-psychology and abusive parenting practices.

Lack of Education and Discipleship

Sunday school wasn’t about Scripture or Christian living. It often took 30 minutes or more to corral people from the coffee and cookies into the three classrooms. There was no curricula. My three daughters’ teacher led inappropriate discussions about astrology and pop culture. The adult class often derailed into discussions better suited to the Discovery Channel or a New Age seminar. Most teachers go either legalistic or extremely liberal, no in-between.

Many churches forego Sunday school altogether or have children’s time during the regular service, showing that kids aren’t welcome in the main church.

I’ve seen Bible studies on Sunday evenings or weeknights – in the church or in members’ homes. Usually, I’m not fond of the books chosen. They’re often trite, focused on certain “problems” or by authors I find questionable.

“The growth of the evangelical church has been ocean-wide, but often puddle-deep.” ~Barry Cooper

Busyness

We only felt valued when we were run ragged.

The American church is not a place of rest, but a place of constant socializing, pew warming, greetings, fakeness.

Every time we visit a new church, we feel sized up by the pastors and leaders.

What do we have to offer? How can they drain us of our gifts, time, money, abilities?

My husband doesn’t know how to set any boundaries with this and he will serve, serve, serve and do, do, do to feel better about himself in his performance-based self-esteem.

The church is not a healthy place for people who just want to rest in God.

How, I wondered, had my life in Christ gotten reduced to so much busyness, so many words, such weighty expectations? How had I gotten this far in the spiritual life without anyone ever having told me that it was OK to stop talking and stop doing and just be in God’s presence? What was I to do with the pent-up longing and frustration that was now expressing itself in these unexpected tears?

There is nothing in Western culture or even in our religious subculture to support us in entering into these times for “unproductive” being rather than frenetic doing.

Ruth Haley Barton, Sacred Rhythms

No Community

No one wants to actually get their hands dirty. Everyone wants a happy clappy church with no negativity.

Everyone is certainly not welcome. You should absolutely not come as you are.

Just pray away mental illness. Just smile more. If you still have depression, you’re obviously not right with God. What is your secret sin? What did you do to deserve to be abused? What were you wearing? God allowed it for your personal faith walk and growth. Then they throw out a lot of Bible verses to back up their bad theology. This is all bullshit.

Don’t ask questions about church history, theology, scripture, leadership, church clarity, politics, or social justice. Don’t ask any questions at all. That rocks the boat and upsets people who are too comfortable in their rich white suburban evangelicalism.

Don’t express any new ideas. Don’t recommend a hymn that is too obscure for the settled congregation. Don’t try to incorporate any tradition or decoration that might offend someone who just wants to maintain the status quo of the vanilla one-hour Sunday service.

“We have turned church membership into country club membership.” ~Thom Rainer

I do miss organ music. I miss singing hymns. I miss the Eucharist. I miss stained glass windows.

What we do instead of church:

Read the Bible

I read the Bible with my son and middle daughters most mornings and we have a little discussion about the passage. I write Scripture every day with monthly themes.

Evening Devotions

We read liturgical selections from Psalms, the Old Testament, and the New Testament, with writings from church fathers every evening with the Pray Now app.

Church History

We have lots of books about church history. We love biographies about missionaries, martyrs, church fathers, and other important people impacted by their faith. We usually coincide our readings to our chronological history studies. It’s important to know.

Act Out Our Faith

We look for opportunities to act out our faith. We practice kindness, empathy, and love. We learn about creation. We pray. The church isn’t a building. We are the church.

Experience Creation

We enjoy God’s creation on nature walks. We are fascinated by the creative plants, insects, and animals that God made just for our use and enjoyment. We love the natural sciences and learn everything we can.

Church should be more about discipleship and less about programs and opportunities to socialize.

We as a family came to the decision to take a break from church after many weeks of prayer.

I am not encouraging anyone else to leave church for any reason.

We may seek a new fellowship after we move again. I seldom enjoy church, but I want my children to have that experience growing up that I never had. They are old enough to make that choice.

I no longer use the word Christian or evangelical. Those words just mean hate these days.

If you feel led to pray for me, be careful that you are not cursing me nor my decision in your heart. Maybe look at yourself and your church and ask why people don’t feel welcome. You may not agree but you should not judge what you don’t understand. You don’t know my history. You don’t know the long and difficult road it took for me to even love Jesus. You do not not know the blood-like drops of sweat as I prayed over this difficult decision. Do not take Scripture out of context. Do not spew your hate and call it loving admonition.

If you still feel led to pray, then pray this:

Pray for church leaders that they may be more including and welcoming. That they not be vanilla and safe but speak boldly the Truth and social justice and be inclusive of all.

Pray for pastors, Sunday school teachers, elders, deacons, lay leaders, ushers, music directors, worship leaders, pastoral counselors…and whatever other titles of a church leader I may have missed. Pray that they have discernment. Pray they preach and teach Biblical Truth. Pray they are not swayed by the world. Pray they are not tempted by money, fame, media, or other people.

Pray for church fellowships to be loving, kind, welcoming, inclusive, and careful with their words to newcomers and seasoned parishioners.

Pray for the parents who are raising children in this fallen world, trying desperately to navigate these tumultuous waters of postmodernism, sexual and gender revolutions, social media, integrity issues, and political scandals.

Pray for the children who are growing up in this 50 Shades of Grey kind of world, confusing sex and social media likes for Love and Truth. Pray they find godly role models to guide them to Truth and they become world-changers for His Kingdom.

Pray for everyone who was and is abused by Church.

Pray for women, people of color, and indigenous people who are excluded from white evangelical church. All missionaries are colonizers.

You might also want to read my statement of faith post. Here’s how I teach my kids religion.

An interesting article: A Quiet Exodus: Why Black Worshipers Are Leaving White Evangelical Churches

I can be spiritual and religions without attending a church.

Share
Pin52
Share
52 Shares
You might also like:

Spring Clean Your Heart

This blog may contain affiliate links: disclosure.
Please see my suggested resources.

By 28 Comments

With the warmer weather and sunshine, the dust seems all the more obvious gathered on the tables, windowsills, and knick-knacks scattered about.

Plenty of dust also settled in my heart this winter.

I struggled with the early sunsets and cold, dreary days. Even my happy light couldn’t help me quite shake it.

As I make natural cleaners to safely remove the dust, dirt, and grime from my floors and other surfaces, I also realize I must invest in a dust removal system for my soul.

Spring is a time of new growth and soul-growth is not to be placed on the back burner.

I revisit our Bible curricula for what works and what needs improvement. Some of the irritating behaviors in my family (and myself!) need to be addressed. I must remain diligent and beg my Father’s forgiveness for laziness this past season.

As I open the windows to let in the fresh air and sunshine and let out the stale air, I also need to air my heart’s grievances in prayer and Bible study as I do some spring cleaning for my soul.

Declutter. Renew. Revive.

Limit activities. Set goals. Personal growth.

What do you need to sweep out of your life?

 5 Ways to Spring Clean Your Heart:

1. Prioritize.

I need to focus on on better priorities. Some things have to get left behind for my sanity since I just can’t do it all.

I refuse to get caught up in the comparison trap. I really just can’t write all the posts, like all the social media, go to all the field trips, read all the books, decorate all the rooms like Pinterest, buy all the trendy clothes.

I must learn to be content within my means and protect my heart from comparison. With prayer and discussion, I can prioritize what’s best for our family. And my priority isn’t having my home look like a magazine or museum or running around constantly.

2. No cutting corners.

I must be diligent in completing a task well if I want my children to learn by my example how to follow through.

Just like I don’t want to sweep the dirt under the bed or rug, I don’t want to leave heart issues unaddressed to grow into bigger issues later. I need to be a diligent parent and coach my children consistently, in love and without nagging.

I need to be open to communication and aware of what my family needs. I need to explore the underlying causes of a behavior rather than react.

3. Relationships are most important.

I need to show my kids and husband that they are most important to me (after God, of course) – more important than my smartphone or my blogs or social media or anything else that might become an idol. Just like I want to be hospitable to guests in my home, so I rush around like a madwoman, cleaning and tidying before anyone comes over – only to apologize profusely for my house that has never been cleaner in years! I’m focusing on the wrong things – the appearances instead of the relationship. If they don’t like me because my house isn’t spotless, then that’s fine. I need to be more like Mary and less like Martha.

As a father shows compassion to his children, so the Lord shows compassion to those who fear him. For he knows our frame; he remembers that we are dust. Psalm 103: 13-14

And sometimes, I need to let the dishes sit and the floor go unvacuumed while I take a walk with my kids to enjoy the sunshine and flowers. They will remember those experiences more than having a museum-spotless house.

4. Don’t allow dirt to collect.

I can’t get lazy and then become overwhelmed by the task at hand. Sometimes, we create bad situations ourselves with poor choices and call it “from the devil.” Of course, Satan will use all ammunition we give to him, but we must accept responsibility for our actions and the consequences of those actions. This also goes for listening to dirt about others. We should just close our ears to that rather than expressing interest or spreading any gossip. If I don’t clean the refrigerator for months, then the task will become overwhelming and take much longer and need more elbow grease than if I wipe it down and pay attention to inventory and expiration dates every week or so. This also goes for social media, mom groups, family bickering. Limit that noise. Stay positive.

5. Ask for help.

When I can’t complete something on my own, I need to turn to Jesus for help. Just like when a maintenance task at the house or yard is too much for me to complete well on my own, s0 I enlist my husband and kids for help… I need to cry to Jesus in prayer when I get overwhelmed with life.

Keep on asking, and you will receive what you ask for. Keep on seeking, and you will find. Keep on knocking, and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks, receives. Everyone who seeks, finds. And to everyone who knocks, the door will be opened. Matthew 7:7-8

Ask for godly counsel. Mentoring seems like a dying art. Do you have a trustworthy Christian mentor?

 I plan to analyze my heart as I tackle spring cleaning this year!

Resources:

You might also like:

Share
Pin91
Share
91 Shares
You might also like:

Teaching the Trinity

This blog may contain affiliate links: disclosure.
Please see my suggested resources.

By 32 Comments

The Trinity is a mystery and teaching it to young children can be quite challenging. The Lenten season is a great time to meditate on the mystery of God and learn about the Trinity.

While the word Trinity never appears in the Bible, the idea of the three-part or triune God is all over both the Old Testament and New Testament. The Hebrew word for God, the plural form Elohim (The plural form of El, meaning “Strong One.”) appears approximately 2,570 times in the Tanakh or Old Testament writings.

As soon as Jesus was baptized, he went up out of the water. At that moment heaven was opened, and he saw the Spirit of God descending like a dove and alighting on him. And a voice from heaven said, “This is my Son, whom I love; with him I am well pleased.” Matthew 3:16-17

Other Trinity Bible verses: John 14:26, 1 John 5:7-8, John 14:16-17, 1 Corinthians 8:5-6, 1 Peter 1:2

Teaching the Trinity

I love this book about the mystery of the Trinity:

Teaching the Trinity Three Ways:

Teaching the Trinity with Shamrocks

St. Patrick’s Day is a great time to use shamrocks to teach the Trinity (even if the story of St. Patrick using it as a teaching tool is just a legend and has little evidence).

Three leaves on one stem. Each heart-shaped leaf represents an aspect of God: Father, Son, Holy Spirit. It’s a great visual!

We sing this song (to the tune of Frère Jacques):

Praise the Father. Praise the Father.

Praise the Son. Praise the Son.

Praise the Holy Spirit. Praise the Holy Spirit.

Three in one. Three in one.

Teaching the Trinity with Shamrocks

Teaching the Trinity with Apples

I love how this book guides children through the Trinity with parts of an apple.

The three parts of an apple represent the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit.

Here’s even a video of the book!

Teaching the Trinity with Apples

Teaching the Trinity with Eggs

A fun science-y way to learn about the Trinity with a hard-boiled egg. Similar to the apple: the parts of the egg represent Father, Son, and Holy Spirit.

A great Sunday school or Easter craft lesson – especially if kids don’t like to eat those pretty dyed eggs they made!

Teaching the Trinity with Eggs

BONUS:

Teach the Trinity with the three phases of water!

liquid: water, solid: ice, gas: steam or vapor.

This is also a great lesson time to teach and/or memorize the Apostles’ Creed and Nicene Creed.

A family study about the Nicene Creed:

And this one about the Apostle’s Creed:

Sing and learn hymns about the Trinity.

The Doxology:

Praise God, from Whom all blessings flow;
Praise Him, all creatures here below;
Praise Him above, ye heavenly host;
Praise Father, Son, and Holy Ghost.

Happy Spring! He is risen indeed.

Linking up here.

Share
Pin274
Share
274 Shares
You might also like:

Our Favorite Christmas Books

This blog may contain affiliate links: disclosure.
Please see my suggested resources.

By 18 Comments

We love reading holiday books during December.

I’ve compiled a list of our Christmas favorites!

There’s a little something for everyone on our list – animals, pirates, fun, history, and religious stories.

Our Favorite Christmas Books

Our Favorite Christmas books:

CLASSIC: The Night Before Christmas by Clement C. Moore – Illustrated by Tasha Tudor, Ted Rand, Will Moses, and/or Robert Sabuda. These versions of The Night Before Christmas are just lovely and should be read every single year!

  1. The Gingerbread Pirates by Kristen Kladstrup
    A funny and magical Christmas story about a gingerbread pirate, Captain Cookie, and his daring adventure on Christmas eve to rescue his crew from a mysterious cannibal named Santa Claus…
  2. The Poky Little Puppy’s First Christmas by Justine Korman
    It’s the poky little puppy’s first Christmas, and he’s not sure what to expect. When he meets an animal friend who’s lost his home, Poky’s quick to help–and learns all about the spirit of Christmas.
  3. Holly Hobbie’s Christmas Book
    An illustrated collection of original Christmas verses, together with some well-known Christmas poems by other authors, F.P. Church’s famous Santa Claus letter, and a recipe for sugar cookies.
  4. The Snowman by Raymond Briggs
    A wordless story. The pictures have “the hazy softness of air in snow. A little boy rushes out into the wintry day to build a snowman, which comes alive in his dreams that night.
  5. The Animal’s Christmas Eve by Gale Wiersum
    So begins a sweet rhyming story in which a group of animals recounts the events surrounding Jesus’ birth in the manger, and the parts some of their ancestors played in it. This is also a counting book.
  6. Brigid’s Cloak by Bryce Milligan
    Brigid’s Cloak retells an ancient tale about one of Ireland’s most beloved saints. On the day she is born Brigid receives a brilliant blue cloak from a mysterious Druid. Years later, the young girl still wears the now tattered but beloved cloak while she tends her sheep. Is it her imagination that suddenly takes her to an unfamiliar land? Or is it something far greater that leads Brigid to a crowded inn in a town called Bethlehem?
  7. Little One, We Knew You’d Come by Sally Lloyd-Jones
    Lush illustrations echo this simple retelling of the Christmas story for the entire family.
  8. Olive, the Other Reindeer by Vivian Walsh
    Olive is merrily preparing for Christmas when suddenly she realizes “Olive… the other Reindeer… I thought I was a dog. Hmmm, I must be a Reindeer!” So she quickly hops aboard the polar express and heads to the North Pole. And while Santa and the other reindeer are a bit surprised that a dog wants to join the their team, in the end Olive and her unusual reindeer skills are just what Santa and his veteran reindeer team need.
  9. The Twelve Days of Christmas – so many gorgeous versions!
  10. The Gift of the Magi by O. Henry
    One dollar and eight-seven cents is all the money Della has in the world to buy her beloved husband a Christmas present. She has nothing to sell except her only treasure—her long, beautiful brown hair. Set in New York at the turn of the twentieth century, this classic piece of American literature tells the story of a young couple and the sacrifices each must make to buy the other a gift.
  11. A Charlie Brown Christmas by Charles M. Schulz
    Christmas is almost here, which means ice-skating, Christmas carols, and sparkly lights everywhere—even on Snoopy’s doghouse! Everyone is enjoying the holiday celebrations except Charlie Brown. Can the Peanuts gang help Charlie Brown discover the true meaning of Christmas?
  12. The Pine Tree Parable by Liz Curtis Higgs
    The Pine Tree Parable tells the heartwarming tale of a farmer and his family who nurture tiny seedlings into fragrant Christmas trees.
    When the trees are tall enough to offer to their neighbors, the farmer’s wife plans to keep the most beautiful pine tree for her family, until one snowy December night when a child teaches her the true meaning of Christmas.
  13. The Christmas Tree that Grew by Phyllis Krasilovsky
    The Adam family bought a live Christmas tree that grew so tall it reached into their neighbors’ apartments.
  14. J is for Jesus by Crystal Bowman
    I want a candy cane too! Everyone loves a candy cane-but it’s easy to overlook the meaning of this familiar Christmas tradition in all the hustle and bustle of the season. This sweet story reminds little ones that the candy cane represents Jesus’ birth and the gospel message too.
  15. A Cup of Christmas Tea by Tom Hegg
    The story of a young man’s reluctant visit to an elderly aunt at Christmastime, and the unexpected joy it brings.
  16. The Polar Express by Chris van Allsberg
    A young boy, lying awake one Christmas Eve, is welcomed aboard a magical trip to the North Pole . . .Through dark forests, over tall mountains, and across a desert of ice, the Polar Express makes its way to the city atop the world, where the boy will make his Christmas wish.
  17. One Shining Star by Anne Vittur Kennedy
    Help your child learn to count using the most beloved story of all―Jesus’ birth! With gentle rhyme and number fun from 1 to 10, this book is full of shepherds, kings angels, animals, a baby, and a shiny star, all waiting to be counted before bedtime.
  18. The Littlest Christmas Elf by Brandi Dougherty
    The newly-arrived and littlest elf at the North Pole feels lonely, fearful, and too small to do anything, until he is befriended by a kind old elf named Nicholas.
  19. One Baby Jesus by Patricia A. Pingry
    The birth of Jesus is presented in the pattern of the familiar “Twelve Days of Christmas.”
  20. The Tale of Three Trees by Angela Ewell Hunt
    Children will be deeply touched as they understand, perhaps for the first time, the significance of Christ’s life and his atoning sacrifice on the cross.
  21. Jacob’s Gift by Max Lucado
    Jacob is a young boy with a gift for carpentry who is busy finishing up a project for a contest. His teacher, Rabbi Simeon, not only instructs him in carpentry, but also teaches him important lessons about God. Rabbi has just taught Jacob that when you give a gift to one of God’s children, it’s like giving a gift to God. The night before the contest while working on his project, Jacob has fallen asleep in the workshop and is awakened by a bright light. The light is a star which is directly over Jacob’s father’s stable. As he approaches the stable, he sees a man, a woman, and a newborn baby which is laying in the straw. Remembering what Rabbi Simeon had told him, Jacob returns to the workshop and takes his project (a feeding trough) to the new family. The morning of the contest, the Rabbi pleased to find out that Jacob has acted upon the lesson he learned and has truly given a gift to God.
  22. Alabaster’s Song by Max Lucado
    Lying in bed, trying to fall asleep on Christmas Eve, a young boy spends his time asking questions of the angel that adorns the top of the Christmas tree, but Alabaster the angel does not answer him, until he asks “What was it like to see Bethlehem?”
  23. Santa, Are You Real? by Harold Myra
    Through colorful illustrations and a heartwarming story, children – and parents – will learn who the real Saint Nick was, when he lived, and why he gave gifts. Most importantly, you’ll see how the original Saint Nick set an example for us today by keeping Christ at the heart of Christmas.
  24. The Donkey’s Dream by Barbara Helen Berger
    He was just an ordinary donkey, but on his back he carried a miracle. He carried the Virgin Mary to Bethlehem on the night she gave birth. Along the way he dreamed he was carrying a city, a ship, a fountain, and a rose. He dreamed he was carrying a lady full of heaven–and he was. Barbara Helen Berger’s glowing artwork and lyrical text perfectly convey the beauty and majesty of the story of the Nativity.
  25. We Three Kings by Gennady Spirin
    Over two thousand years ago, three great kings journeyed across the desert, riding through the heat of day and dark of night. Each from a different region, each beckoned by the same gleaming star, each bearing treasures, each wishing to welcome a newborn asleep in a manger’s hay — a baby named Jesus, who would change the world.This beloved Christmas carol, written in 1857, celebrates the wise men’s journey and the first Christmas night. Internationally renowned artist Gennady Spirin pays his own type of homage with paintings so exquisitely detailed and wrought that they, too, are a gift — to that baby in the manger and to you.
  26. The Other Wise Man by Henry van Dyke
    Though not mentioned by name in Scripture, all know the legend of Caspar, Balthazar and Melchior, whose gifts of gold, frankincense and myrrh for the newborn king are heralded in carols. But what if another had missed the rendezvous and then spent years, searching for the source of the light? Henry Van Dyke imagines that alternative in The Other Wise Man, originally published in 1895. The narrator tells us that along the way, the fourth Magi did not find the Messiah to worship, but found many to help.
  27. Jotham’s Journey OR Bartholomew’s Passage OR Tabitha’s Travels OR Ishtar’s Odyssey by Arnold Ytreetide. We read one of these Advent stories each year!
  28. Christmas Day in the Morning by Pearl Buck
    Rob wants to get his father something special for Christmas this year—something that shows how much he really loves him. But it’s Christmas Eve, and he doesn’t have much money to spend. What could he possibly get? Suddenly, Rob thinks of the best gift of all…
  29. The Jesse Tree by Dean Lambert Smith or Geraldine McCaughrean. We read through one of these each year.
    Familiar biblical tales that trace the family tree of Christ, from the Garden of Eden to Jesus’ birth.
  30. Red and Lulu by Matt Tavares
    Red and Lulu make their nest in a particularly beautiful evergreen tree. It shades them in the hot months and keeps them cozy in the cold months, and once a year the people who live nearby string lights on their tree and sing a special song: O Christmas Tree, O Christmas Tree. But one day, something unthinkable happens, and Red and Lulu are separated. It will take a miracle for them to find each other again. Luckily, it’s just the season for miracles.
  31. The Story of Holly and Ivy by Rumer Godden
    Ivy, Holly, and Mr. and Mrs. Jones all have one Christmas wish. Ivy, an orphan, wishes for a real home and sets out in search of the grandmother she’s sure she can find. Holly, a doll, wishes for a child to bring her to life. And the Joneses wish more than anything for a son or daughter to share their holiday. Can all three wishes come true?
  32. The Christmas Miracle of Jonathan Toomey by Susan Wojciechowski
    Jonathan Toomey is the best woodcarver in the valley, but he is always alone and never smiles. No one knows about the mementos of his lost wife and child that he keeps in an unopened drawer. But one early winter’s day, a widow and her young son approach him with a gentle request that leads to a joyful miracle.
  33. The Snow Angel by Debby Boone – We just love the message and illustrations. I bought this for me!
    Rose and her grandfather seem to be the only people left in their village who know how to dream and experience the beauty of the world, until a snow angel comes to life and creates a wondrous event.
  34. The Christmas Wish by Lori Evert
    Long ago, a brave little girl named Anja wanted to be one of Santa’s elves. So she leaves a note for her family and helps her elderly neighbor prepare for the holiday, then she straps on her skis, and heads out into the snowy landscape. From a red bird to a polar bear to a reindeer, a menagerie of winter animals help Anja make her way to Santa. A generous trim-size, matte cover, extraordinary photographs, and foiled title make this a special book for the holiday season.And don’t miss the other “Wish” books:
    The Reindeer Wish
    The Tiny Wish
    The Brave Little Puppy
    The Puppy’s Wish — coming soon!
  35. The Message of the Birds by Kate Westerlund
    An old owl tells the Christmas story to the community of birds as he has done so many times before, but when he tells of the special message from the Baby Jesus, a little bird questions why they no longer sing the message. “People no longer listen,” is the sad realization. The birds decide to share the message once more, but this time to the children of the world. And what unfolds is surely a Christmas wonder.
  36. Saint Francis and the Christmas Donkey by Robert Byrd
    When Saint Francis stumbles upon a sad donkey, he feels obliged to tell him about the wonderful history the donkey has in the Christian religion as the animal who carried Mary to Nazareth when she was pregnant with Baby Jesus.
  37. The Glorious Impossible (Illustrated with Frescoes from the Scrovegni Chapel by Giotto) by Madeleine L’Engle
    The birth of Jesus was a Glorious Impossible. Like love, it cannot be explained, it can only be rejoiced in. And that is what master storyteller Madeleine L’Engle does in this compellingly written narrative, inspired by Giotto’s glorious frescoes from the Scrovegni Chapel in Padua.

38. The Tomten and the Fox by Astrid Lindgren

In this sequel to the classic The Tomten, the creator of Pippi Longstocking adapts a Swedish folk tale into a beloved children’s story. When a hungry fox wanders into a farm late at night looking for food, the guard troll Tomten finds a way to keep the farm animals safe and feed the fox at the same time.

39. On Winter’s Eve by C.D. Alexander

40. The Yule Tomte and the Little Rabbits by Ulf Stark

Grump the Yule Tomte lives all alone, which is exactly how he likes it! He’s waiting for Christmas to arrive when all of a sudden a gust of wind steals his mittens from the washing line and his hat from his head. That’s the last straw — he won’t be the Yule Tomte any more!

Binny and Barty, the rabbit children, live with their family in the forest. They’ve never heard of Christmas, or the Yule Tomte, until the wind brings them some strange gifts…

All the animals in the forest prepare for the arrival of Christmas. They make presents, bake sweet treats and even write a song. But will the Yule Tomte ever bring Christmas to the big forest?

41. Tomten by Viktor Rydberg

In the middle of winter and late at night, an old friend returns for his annual visit to take care of the animals and look after the inhabitants of the old farmhouse.  He goes through his regular routine but becomes perplexed by an undying question for which he cannot find the answer.  Generations come and generations go.  “But where do they come from and to where do they go?”

42. Otto and the Secret Light of Christmas by Nora Surojegin

One day Otto, an elfin adventurer, finds a postcard on the seashore showing pictures of beautiful sparkling lights in the night sky with the words, ‘The light of Christmas!’ If this ‘Christmas’ can brighten even the gloomiest Finnish winter, Otto decides he must find it. So he heads north, trudging through dark forests and skiing towards the fells of Lapland, in search of the secret light of Christmas.

On his way he meets the mighty Kekri, king of the forest, Niiu, a beautiful leaf fairy, a hungry badger, a friendly bear and the infamous Ironworm. But will he ever find the mysterious light he’s looking for, and will Christmas brighten Otto’s winter?

43. Little Tomte’s Christmas Wish by Inkeri Karvonen

Little Tomte lives happily in his cosy house beside a beautiful tree. When winter arrives, he’s worried that Christmas won’t come. So he makes a special Christmas wish and   embarks on a candle-making plan which will help make his wish come true.

44. Fotinoula and the Christmas Goblin by R.G. Fraser-Green

11-year old Fotinoula doesn’t believe her grandfather when he warns her about the Christmas goblins. After all, the Kallikantzaroi were just an old Greek myth. Creatures with blood-red eyes didn’t really climb up from the underworld during the Twelve Days of Christmas to steal little children, and certainly not in a busy city like Athens.

45. Joy to the World by Tomie dePaola

This collection unifies three of the incomparable Tomie dePaola’s most beloved Christmas stories into one handsome volume. Vividly portrayed and expertly crafted, The Night of Las Posadas, The Story of the Three Wise Kings, and The Legend of the Poinsettia are sure enchant and mesmerize the whole family during the holiday season.

46. Jan Brett’s Christmas Treasury

This deluxe Christmas collection is the perfect holiday gift! It includes seven of Jan Brett’s most beloved Yuletide titles: The Night Before Christmas, Trouble with Trolls, Christmas Trolls, The Mitten, The Hat, The Twelve Days of Christmas, and The Wild Christmas Reindeer.

47. The Nutcracker by E. T. A. Hoffmann

Written in 1816 by one of the leaders of German Romanticism for his children, nephews, and nieces, The Nutcracker captures better than any other story a child’s wonder at Christmas. The gift of a handsomely decorated nutcracker from a mysterious uncle sets the stage for a Christmas Eve like no other for the little girl Marie. That night, Marie’s extraordinary present comes to life, defends her from the taunting Mouse King, and whisks her off to the Kingdom of Dolls.

48. Letters From Father Christmas by J.R.R. Tolkien

Every December an envelope bearing a stamp from the North Pole would arrive for J.R.R. Tolkien’s children. Inside would be a letter in a strange, spidery handwriting and a beautiful colored drawing or painting. The letters were from Father Christmas.

They told wonderful tales of life at the North Pole: how the reindeer got loose and scattered presents all over the place; how the accident-prone North Polar Bear climbed the North Pole and fell through the roof of Father Christmas’s house into the dining room; how he broke the Moon into four pieces and made the Man in it fall into the back garden; how there were wars with the troublesome horde of goblins who lived in the caves beneath the house, and many more.

49. The Year of the Perfect Christmas Tree: An Appalachian Story by Gloria Houston

This unforgettable tale, illustrated by Caldecott Medalist Barbara Cooney, has become a seasonal classic-a touching and joyful story about courage and the power of family.

50. Amazing Peace: A Christmas Poem by Maya Angelou

In this beautiful, deeply moving poem, Maya Angelou inspires us to embrace the peace and promise of Christmas, so that hope and love can once again light up our holidays and the world. “Angels and Mortals, Believers and Nonbelievers, look heavenward,” she writes, “and speak the word aloud. Peace.”

Read by the poet at the lighting of the National Christmas Tree at the White House on December 1, 2005, Maya Angelou’ s celebration of the “Glad Season” is a radiant affirmation of the goodness of life.

51. The Greatest Gift: A Christmas Tale by Philip Van Doren Stern

For almost seventy years, people the world over have fallen in love with Frank Capra’s classic Christmas movie It’s a Wonderful Life. But few of those fans know that Capra’s film was based on a short story by author Philip Van Doren Stern, which came to Stern in a dream one night.

Unable at first to find a publisher for his evocative tale about a man named George Pratt who ponders suicide until he receives an opportunity to see what the world would be like without him, Stern ultimately published the story in a small pamphlet and sent it out as his 1943 Christmas card. One of those 200 cards found its way into the hands of Frank Capra, who shared it with Jimmy Stewart, and the film that resulted became the holiday tradition we cherish today.

52. Dasher: How a Brave Little Doe Changed Christmas Forever by Matt Tavares

Dasher is an adventurous young reindeer with a wish in her heart. She spends her days with her family under the hot sun in a traveling circus, but she longs for a different life — one where there is snow beneath her hooves and the North Star above her head. One day, when the opportunity arises, Dasher seizes her destiny and takes off in pursuit of the life she wants to live. It’s not long before she meets a nice man in a red suit with a horse-drawn sleigh — a man named Santa. And soon, with the help of a powerful Christmas wish, nothing will be the same.

What’s your favorite holiday book?

You might also like:

Share
Pin24
Share
24 Shares
You might also like:

Dealing with Disappointment

This blog may contain affiliate links: disclosure.
Please see my suggested resources.

By 10 Comments

We all deal with disappointments, whether it’s a bad grade on a test, a pregnancy or miscarriage, not receiving a job or promotion we think we deserved, getting PCS orders to a less-than-desired locale, or the presidential candidate of our choice losing the race.

I don’t think we as a culture know how to handle disappointment.

We give medals, trophies, and ribbons for participating. There’s no incentive for trying to do a good job anymore. Mediocrity reigns!

We complain, cry, or even riot when we don’t get our way. We are a nation of sore losers.

How we handle disappointment shows a lot about our maturity level.

I’ve lost numerous jobs. I have two failed marriages. I have countless lost friendships. I have a rocky relationship with my parents. Being a military wife brings its share of disappointments with deployments and PCSes.

As a daughter and friend, wife and mother, I constantly feel like a failure.

Life has ups and downs. People fail us. Tragedies happen.

I’ve had to learn the hard way to handle disappointment in a mature way in order to model that to my kids.

It’s true that a mama’s attitude affects the whole household.

We have to teach our children how to handle disappointment well and to bounce back from defeat.

We must accept finite disappointment, but never lose infinite hope. ~Martin Luther King, Jr.

It’s ok to get emotional.

Our gut reactions to disappointment are normal.

We get sad, scared, upset, angry. We’re disappointed. It’s negative. It’s ok to cry a little, but don’t dwell in that negative state for long. Don’t get depressed. Take action.

Analyze it and move on.

Every single time I get disappointed, it brings to mind every past hurt in my entire life history. I get sick to my stomach. I worry. I get anxious. I rehash conversations in my head. I loathe myself for the destructive relationships I was in then. I think what could’ve should’ve been. I imagine what if I could go back in time and redo it or tell myself what I know now? I blame myself, often unnecessarily.

Emotions are what make us human. Make us real. The word ’emotion’ stands for energy in motion. Be truthful about your emotions, and use your mind and emotions in your favor, not against yourself. ~Robert T. Kiyosaki

Who’s to blame?

Not that we should always place blame, but it sometimes helps to know who is at fault.

We ask ourselves: Did I mess up?

In this fallen world, sometimes plans are purposely sabotaged. People are mean. We are bullied. It seems as if evil wins.

Try to resolve the situation with the other person if possible. Have a plan for the conversation and a resolution in mind. Sincere apologies go a long way towards forgiveness and healing.

Sometimes confrontation and reconciliation aren’t possible, and having no closure can be even harder to bear.

People we love hurt us. It’s just a part of life. Sometimes, commitment and duty are the only threads holding us together in bad times.

Things get lost. Trust is sometimes misplaced. People forget to do or say things. Lies are revealed. Bad things happen to good people.

Sometimes, there is no one to blame. We shouldn’t take everything so personally.

We can dwell on these things and let hate and rage devour us, or we can take note of it, forgive, and move on.

The sudden disappointment of a hope leaves a scar which the ultimate fulfillment of that hope never entirely removes. ~Thomas Hardy

What were expectations?

Do I expect too much?

Were my instructions not clear? What could I have done differently? Why doesn’t she like me?

Self-reflection and analysis are healthy.

Sometimes, we are just let down by those we depend on.

We shouldn’t lower our expectations because of this. We should hold our standards high. But we should also be realistic.

I’m not in this world to live up to your expectations and you’re not in this world to live up to mine. ~Bruce Lee

Try, try again.

Be proactive for next time. Yes, there will be a next time.

Disappointment builds character, especially patience, when you allow that to mold you. Learn to lose with grace.

Don’t beat yourself up. Fix whatever can be fixed. Learn from your mistakes. Look on the bright side.

Yes, it’s easier said than done.

Love anyway.

There’s always failure. And there’s always disappointment. And there’s always loss. But the secret is learning from the loss, and realizing that none of those holes are vacuums. ~Michael J. Fox

Have faith.

Pray. Meditate. Read. Create. Journal your feelings.

Everything happens for a reason.

Some of of my greatest disappointments created amazing opportunities.

This is maturity.

When you find your path, you must not be afraid. You need to have sufficient courage to make mistakes. Disappointment, defeat, and despair are the tools God uses to show us the way.  ~Paulo Coelho

Get with like-minded friends.

Find comfort with those who can and will agree with you. You will learn who your real friends are during bad times. We should be there for each other – to be shoulders to cry on and iron sharpening iron.

There’s no shame in unfriending bigots on social media. You should sever toxic friendships (and sometimes even family members) online and in real life. Protect your boundaries.

Don’t waste words on people who deserve your silence. Sometimes the most powerful thing you can say is nothing.

A hug or a cuppa with a friend goes a long way towards healing. We need friends to inspire hope.

I would rather walk with a friend in the dark, than alone in the light. ~Helen Keller

How do you handle disappointment? How do you help your kids through it?


Share
Pin15
Share
15 Shares
You might also like: