Jennifer Lambert

A Sacred Balance

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Today’s Proverbs 31 Person

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We love to hate it.

All the pressure to live up to an impossible standard.

Generations of wives and mothers admonished, scolded, humiliated by church leaders for not being perfect.

I’ve known people to try to follow these verses to the very letter, even going into debt to actually plant a vineyard.

Perhaps, we should just look for the intent behind the lines.

We all want our children to be healthy and happy and kind, to love others and be loved well.

This chapter consists of two poetic sections. The first nine verses detail the qualities needed to be a wise ruler, and the second part are the qualities describing an excellent wife.

In most translations, verses 1-9 are called The Words of Lemuel. In The Message, verses 1-9 are entitled: Speak Out for Justice.

In The Message, verses 10-31 are entitled: Hymn to a Good Wife. The ESV calls the verses The Woman Who Fears the Lord. The Amplified Bible calls these verses Description of a Worthy Woman. The HCSB calls these verses In Praise of a Capable Wife.

For reference, here is the Bible version that many of us memorized.

Proverbs 31, KJV:

The Words of King Lemuel

1 The words of king Lemuel, the prophecy that his mother taught him.

2 What, my son? and what, the son of my womb? and what, the son of my vows?

3 Give not thy strength unto women, nor thy ways to that which destroyeth kings.

4 It is not for kings, O Lemuel, it is not for kings to drink wine; nor for princes strong drink:

5 Lest they drink, and forget the law, and pervert the judgment of any of the afflicted.

6 Give strong drink unto him that is ready to perish, and wine unto those that be of heavy hearts.

7 Let him drink, and forget his poverty, and remember his misery no more.

8 Open thy mouth for the dumb in the cause of all such as are appointed to destruction.

9 Open thy mouth, judge righteously, and plead the cause of the poor and needy.

The Virtues of Noble Woman

10 Who can find a virtuous woman? for her price is far above rubies.

11 The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her, so that he shall have no need of spoil.

12 She will do him good and not evil all the days of her life.

13 She seeketh wool, and flax, and worketh willingly with her hands.

14 She is like the merchants’ ships; she bringeth her food from afar.

15 She riseth also while it is yet night, and giveth meat to her household, and a portion to her maidens.

16 She considereth a field, and buyeth it: with the fruit of her hands she planteth a vineyard.

17 She girdeth her loins with strength, and strengtheneth her arms.

18 She perceiveth that her merchandise is good: her candle goeth not out by night.

19 She layeth her hands to the spindle, and her hands hold the distaff.

20 She stretcheth out her hand to the poor; yea, she reacheth forth her hands to the needy.

21 She is not afraid of the snow for her household: for all her household are clothed with scarlet.

22 She maketh herself coverings of tapestry; her clothing is silk and purple.

23 Her husband is known in the gates, when he sitteth among the elders of the land.

24 She maketh fine linen, and selleth it; and delivereth girdles unto the merchant.

25 Strength and honour are her clothing; and she shall rejoice in time to come.

26 She openeth her mouth with wisdom; and in her tongue is the law of kindness.

27 She looketh well to the ways of her household, and eateth not the bread of idleness.

28 Her children arise up, and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praiseth her.

29 Many daughters have done virtuously, but thou excellest them all.

30 Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a woman that feareth the Lord, she shall be praised.

31 Give her of the fruit of her hands; and let her own works praise her in the gates.

Yes, the poetry is beautiful, but I find some of the phrasing and word choice problematic. I like the footnotes on the text here.

The text-poem of the 31st proverb is a wish list of a queen for her prince-son’s wife-to-be. It was written in an ancient time and place with patriarchal values, when women were property and often nameless and powerless.

It was never really meant to be read as a checklist for Christian women to aspire to achieve. It’s not even possible and alluded to the idea of a supermom, which is exhausting and depressing.

As the mother of four children: three biological daughters and one biological son, I often dream of what their lives might be like when they become independent adults.

I too have a wish list for my children and their futures, whether or not they choose to get married or have children of their own.

Today’s Proverbs 31 Person

Child, do not listen to the admonitions of society, the prophecies written on the subway walls, as taught by the media, relatives, spouses, partners, friends, acquaintances, eBook authors, bloggers, wannabe therapists whose advice no one asked for.

Love one another.

Love one another.

Love one another.

Be a social justice warrior. Don’t just hide behind a keyboard. Get out and work for change. Teach your kids, friends, or anyone you know to love everyone and be kind always. Notice differences and privilege and strive to be anti-racist and inclusive. Yes, one person can make a difference.

Just say no to drugs. Try even to eschew the prescription drugs that American doctors seem to yearn to prescribe as bandaids in lieu of relationship. Find healthy outlets for your emotions and embrace all the feelings. Sit in your feelings until you understand them and find healing. Look to mindfulness and simplify, de-stress, slow down.

Virtue is subjective and often colonialist. Every society has different values. Know your worth and be unashamed. Claim it and proclaim it and don’t let anyone disrespect you. Don’t disrespect others.

Trust in your inner self, your intuition. Don’t believe everything that you breathe.

Have integrity before all, especially children. Lead by example.

Be a servant leader, knowledgeable in running an efficient household or business. Don’t ask others what you can do for yourself. Don’t ask others to do what you’re unwilling to do.

Be kind and think before speaking. Practice nondefensive and nonviolent communication.

Prepare for the future with investments. Be proactive but not anxious. Life of Fred Financial Choices recommends saving at least 25% of income. Yes, it’s hard during some seasons. Learn the value of not getting instant gratification.

Get that side hustle on. Or not. Use your unique skills and talents. But take care not to burn out. We are more than our performance.

Be grateful in all you do and joy will surely follow. Think positive and when you feel down, renew yourself in nature, in wide open spaces, or art, music, something awe-inspiring to remind you of your divinity.

Shop for the best deals on groceries, but don’t become a hoarder or extreme couponer. Add the digital coupons to the Kroger and iBotta apps each week. It’s just a few minutes of tedium but it does pay off quite a bit. Don’t buy something you don’t need. Don’t buy something just because it’s on sale.

Empty the cat litter before trash day. Do the dishes and laundry before they pile up. Guide children and others to do chores regularly. Recycle and reduce waste. Be efficient and proactive to limit anxiety.

We are not responsible for what others think of us or say to us. We can live rent free in someone’s mind for years and that’s on them. Be at peace in your words and actions.

Learn to accessorize and what’s attractive for your body type and coloring, but don’t be vain or obsessed with appearance. Everyone has a unique beauty.

It’s important that we don’t compare ourselves to others or to fictional characters. We are individuals – each with our own histories, perhaps even traumas to overcome. Own yourself and all your flaws, imperfections, and your glory.

Be a blessing to others.

I am blessed to have four amazing children who I get to interact with every day as I seem them bloom and grow in our home and homeschool.

While I do dream of grandchildren, like most people, but I dream more for happiness and health. I want my children to experience great relationships with all people they come into contact with, romantic or not. I pray that my children are role models for others.

Children don’t just need to be loved; they need to know that nothing they do will change the fact that they’re loved.

Alfie Kohn, The Myth of the Spoiled Child

I embrace my children for who they are and who they will become – whether they are cishet, nonbinary, trans, genderless, genderfluid, gay, or ace.

I love my children beyond what they can offer me.

It’s not about my comfort or what society told me my dreams and wishes should be for my children who are their own individual selves.

My children owe me nothing while I owe them everything.

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How We Celebrate Christmas

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Christmas is probably the biggest holiday of the year in Western culture.

The Christmas season surpasses most of the religious significance to be a commercial, capitalist month-long (or more) event.

Every year, I’m on a quest to make this holiday simpler and more spiritual and less commercial. I don’t want the focus and memories just to be expensive presents.

When my kids were little, I stressed every year how to celebrate holidays to make them memorable.

We never celebrated with extended family. As a military family, we choose to stay home and have a quiet celebration with ourselves or travel over the holiday break to make it special. We went to Maui when we were stationed in Hawaii and Rome when we were stationed in Germany.

We lay off much academic homeschool work for fun holiday themes for a month or a few weeks. My kids enjoy a school break.

Now that my kids are teens, I feel I laid a good foundation for holiday traditions and we continue to choose what’s most important for our family each year.

How We Celebrate Christmas

The Christmas season begins with the first Sunday of Advent. We light candles in our wreath each week and do readings each day.

We continue to limit the importance of gift giving and focus on debt-free holidays. Check out my 5 Ways to Cultivate Relationships Over Stuff.

December is a time of slowing down for us. We look over the year and remember. We curl up with tea and books and candles – hygge.

We celebrate Saint Nicholas and other saints days. We don’t do Santa.

We love watching holiday movies and listening to holiday music.

We read lots of holiday books each year, adding to our library.

We celebrate the Winter Solstice with some fun traditions. We love learning new ways to celebrate and keep magic alive.

All grown-ups were once children… but only few of them remember it.

Antoine de Saint-Exupéry, The Little Prince

My favorite hymns are Lo, How a Rose E’er Blooming and In the Bleak Midwinter. I also love the Alabama Christmas album and Dolly Parton and The Carpenters.

We all look forward to special meals and foods to celebrate – prime rib or tenderloin, ham and twice-baked potatoes, cookies and sweet baked goods to share or have with tea. My middle daughter is usually in charge of setting the table with the pretty holiday tablecloth and great-grandma’s china and silverware. The kids love to try out new napkin folding patterns.

Some years we listen or watch The Queen’s address and the Pope’s address or Doctor Who. We almost always watch National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation on Christmas Eve.

Christmas doesn’t quite end on the 25th of December. We celebrate Epiphany and Candlemas. It helps to get through the dark and dreary winter days.

Christmastide is about hope and love.

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What’s your favorite part of Christmas?

Linking up: Create with Joy, Welcome Heart, April Harris, Anita Ojeda, Little Cottage, Ducks in a Row, Ducks, LouLou Girls, Suburbia, InstaEncouragements, Our Three Peas, Anchored Abode, Soaring with Him, Ginger Snap Crafts, Girlish Whims, Debbie Kitterman, Slices of Life, Answer is Choco, Simply Sweet Home, Grammy’s Grid, CWJ, OMHG, Marilyn’s Treats,

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Celebrating Summer Solstice

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In the Northern Hemisphere, the summer solstice usually falls between June 20 and June 22.

The summer solstice symbolizes rebirth or return of the light.

The word “Solstice” is derived from the Latin words Sol+systere, meaning “Sun”+ “standing still.”  The Summer Solstice is the longest day and the shortest night of the year. Following this Solstice, the days get shorter and the nights longer.

Many traditions celebrated the Solstices — Ancient Egyptians, the Aztecs of Mexico, Chinese, Chumash Indians of California, Indigenous Europeans.

In China, people mark the day by honoring Li, the Chinese Goddess of Light. The Dragon Boat Festival is a major event celebrated on the fifth day of the fifth lunar month, placing it near enough to the summer solstice that many people associate the two.

In Sweden, Litha (to illuminate, to shine, light) is celebrated with bonfires and maypoles and festival celebration.

The main features of the Tirgan festival in Iran are dancing, reading poetry, splashing water on others, and eating traditional foods such as spinach soup and saffron rice pudding. People also like to wear rainbow colored bands tied to their wrists for 10 days, then tossing them into the water or traditionally “giving them to the god of the wind.”

In North America, many Native American tribes held ritual dances to honor the sun. The Sioux were known to hold one of the most spectacular rituals— The Sun Dance. Their bodies were decorated in the symbolic colors of red (sunset), blue (sky), yellow (lightning), white (light), and black (night).

On the morning of the summer solstice, the sun rises above the Stonehenge Heel Stone in England on the avenue leading up to the monument’s Stone Circle, and the morning sun rays shine directly into the center of the monument. English Heritage will Live Stream the event for the first time ever in 2020!

St. John’s Day

Usually, a saint’s feast day is celebrated on the day that the saint died. St. John along with the Virgin Mary are the only two saints whose birthdays are celebrated.

St. John’s Day is one of the oldest festivals celebrated by Christians. It is celebrated six months before Christmas and is one of the principle festivals of the Christian religion. Like Christmas, this day is marked with three masses; first a vigil, second a dawn mass, and finally another at midday.

The feast day of Saint John the Baptist is a popular feast day in many European countries. It coincided nicely with much older pagan holidays that celebrated the summer solstice. It is still celebrated as a religious feast day in several countries, such as Denmark, Norway, Sweden, Finland, Estonia, Latvia, and Lithuania. A central theme in the celebrations is the lighting of bonfires.

Typical customs may include the gathering of the perennial herb St. John’s Wort for medicinal, religious, or spiritual use. The collection of flowers for floral wreaths is popular. The wreaths are dried and hung in the house all year until the next St. John’s Day.

The feast falling around the time of the solstice is considered by many to be significant, recalling the words of John the Baptist with regard to Jesus: “He must increase, but I must decrease” (John 3:30).

The radiant beauty of the world
Compels my inmost soul to free
God-given powers of my nature
That they may soar into the cosmos,
To take wing from myself
And trustingly to seek myself
In cosmic light and cosmic warmth.

Calendar of the Soul

Midsummer

In the town of Kuldīga in Latvia, many people participate in a naked jog through the town on June 24th, at 3 a.m., taking them over the Venta River where they’re greeted with beer.

In Estonia, the lighting of the bonfire and jumping over it is an important tradition, done to bring prosperity and luck as well as protect the home.

In Austria the midsummer solstice is celebrated each year with a spectacular procession of ships down the Danube River as it flows through the wine-growing Wachau Valley just north of Vienna. Up to thirty ships sail down the river in line as fireworks erupt from the banks and hill tops while bonfires blaze and the vineyards are lit up. Lighted castle ruins also erupt with fireworks during the 90-minute cruise downstream.

How to Celebrate Summer Solstice

Sunbathing. Wear sunscreen of course!

Make a flower crown or wreath.

Suncatcher crafts.

Gardening.

Go to a butterfly house or garden.

Make or buy or be a sundial.

Learn about and play with shadows.

Read summer books. Read Midsummer’s Night’s Dream by Shakespeare!

Visit a local farmer’s market.

Gather healing plants and herbs.

Bonfire. Fire is used symbolically throughout summer solstice celebrations in praise of the sun, to bring luck and to ward off the darkness.  And the spiral is also a symbol associated with the solstices. It’s a great night to host a backyard bbq with marshmallows!

Happy Summer!

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Celebrating Winter Solstice

Celebrating Lammas Day

Celebrating May Day

Celebrating Candlemas, Groundhog Day, St. Brigid

Celebrating Halloween and All Saints Day

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Prayer for Quarantine

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For all those who think they’re unaffected by a virus.

Insulated in a bubble of wealth without reason.

Dark hair roots show when they remove their red hats.

We can all see who you really are now.

Thinking the economy is more important than a soul.

Confused by authority, leadership, contradictions.

Crying over puppy videos while calling the police on black and brown people.

Who are you to deny that we are all connected?

Medical professionals who cry in the hallways like hysterical Cassandra and her unheard prophecies.

Giving birth alone, hearing ecstatic or dire medical news alone, attending medical appointments and procedures alone.

Being too scared to go to the ER with heart attack or stroke symptoms or an injury.

Immunocompromised or disabled and invisible.

The individuals who die alone in silence, forgotten, mere statistics.

Who is essential?

The lack of paper products and cleaning supplies.

Crying over restaurant closures and having to make food for oneself.

The leavening disappeared from store shelves and now swamps the news.

Scarcity doesn’t affect everyone equally.

What is necessary?

The celebrations passed over.

Coming together with online streaming.

Dates that were looked forward to, milestones that meant so much.

The teens crying over missed prom, sports, graduation, college orientation.

The parents whose hopes are locked away in their bedrooms playing video games.

The kids watching their friends from windows, online, social media.

Abusers locked away with their victims.

Who are the helpers?

The privileged ones who fight for their right to party while starving beggars sit at the grocery store door palms up.

They had a secure job a month ago. They were living the American dream with all their expensive toys and debt, keeping up with the Joneses.

Sheep led to the slaughter with jeers and cheers.

Maskless protesters demand rights, but not for all.

We need more than a hug and a Snickers bar.

Who is expendable?

Even those who long to just go back to normal know in the corner of their minds that it wasn’t a good normal.

Desire to create a better simpler normal, including all, loving all, welcoming all, protecting all.

Let us pray.

Let us act.

Let us love.

Let us change.

Let us heal.

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How I Teach Religion

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My town hosted a big evangelical Christian rally last year on a summer Sunday evening at a local public park.

It was a big rock and roll concert, laser lights, food trucks, loud worship, and louder preaching.

I could barely hear the birds and cicadas in my backyard from 4:30-8:30.

Their purpose confuses me.

I looked up the sponsoring organization. They mostly advertise charity work. They’re independent of denomination.

They planted trees at a local school and they were very involved in tornado relief around Dayton for a couple months. Everything they post on social media screams, “Look at me! Look at the good we do – for Jesus!”

I’m reminded of the condemnation of showy religion in Matthew 6.

Their statement lists that marriage is between one man and one woman. Some of their language assumes that women are reduced to lesser jobs, unable to serve in leadership positions, like in many evangelical and fundamentalist denominations.

My biggest concerns are how a religious charity is involved with public schools (separation of church and state?) and the white saviors on their website and social media photos and videos – usually posed smiling with beautiful black and brown children. Do those families know their children are being exploited?

I see things like this more and more. Perhaps in the USA, people really just don’t know any better.

In seeking to fill a hole in our souls, people turn to performative activism and churchtainment instead of doing the work for sacred inner transformation.

Teaching religion to my children is very important to me. I didn’t attend church or learn anything of value about religion when I was growing up.

I don’t rely on church or Sunday school or pastors because they have always disappointed me. Sometimes, they have been outright wrong or hateful or exclusionary. I have certain values I want to instill and I want history and doctrine taught well.

As a family, we have been seekers of Truth. We’ve attended AWANA, Sunday school, VBS, and several different church denomination services over the years. I am often appalled by the curriculum, teaching (or lack thereof), refusal to answer questions (the kids’ and mine), advertisements for questionable charities and services, emotional and psychological abuse, and lukewarm attitudes.

I am disgusted by Christian celebrity worship.

I lean more towards Celtic mysticism, but I encourage my children to learn and worship on their own however they feel comfortable. It’s not my job to convert them to anything.

What is religion?

Religion is a set of beliefs concerning the cause, nature, and purpose of the universe, especially when considered as the creation of a superhuman agency or agencies, usually involving devotional and ritual observances, and often containing a moral code governing the conduct of human affairs.

How do I guide and teach my kids religion? Do I just rely on a denomination, church leaders and officials, Christian TV and music, or do I let them loose on their own to figure it out?

Questions to ask when choosing religion curriculum:

  1. How does the program support your mission statement?
  2. What type of curriculum is best for my children? (Lectionary, workshop rotation, story-based, Montessori, etc.)
  3. How are sacraments taught /covered? Is this in keeping with my tradition?
  4. How is Jesus portrayed? God? The Holy Spirit? Is this in keeping with my tradition?
  5. How are children incorporated into religious life: through worship, service projects, faith-in-action, fellowship?

Religious education is the teaching of the aspects of religion: beliefs, doctrines, rituals, customs, rites, and personal roles.

I feel a lot of churches really miss the mark on religious education. Church leaders wrongly assume that people have been raised in church, have healthy spiritual lives, are discussing spiritual topics with their kids, are active in their communities, have it all figured out.

In almost every world religion, we are commanded to LOVE GOD and LOVE OUR NEIGHBOR.

Good neighboring means we want to find a way to be part of the solution, not part of the problem. 

How can we be loving neighbors?

That the cross stands at the center of the Christian faith, tells us that pain and suffering are not without meaning. In fact, we believe that they can serve a redemptive purpose. Not that we go looking for pain and suffering, it’s just that we don’t need to be afraid when pain and suffering come looking for us. Frederick Buechner, termed this approach the stewardship of pain. I think that’s what we’re after. Often, when I find myself bristling against the bridle of pain, I remember of the words of Barbara Brown Taylor: “Not to accept suffering as a normal, inevitable part of being alive seems like a big mistake, and finding ways to cover it up seems like choosing anesthesia. There is a sense in which…if I will trust that what comes to me in my life is for me and not against me…what I find is that it breaks my idols, that it breaks my isolation, that it challenges my sense of independence, it does all kinds of things for me that I would not willingly do that are for me, that are for my health.”

Tim Suttle

America is a culture of pew warmers who sing pretty songs while ignoring social justice and personal inner change.

Did I offer peace today? Did I bring a smile to someone’s face? Did I say words of healing? Did I let go of my anger and resentment? Did I forgive? Did I love? These are the real questions.

Henri Nouwen

As I read aloud the Quran and Womanist Midrash to my children every weekday morning, I feel deceived, lied to – by church, society, history.

It is my job to learn, learn, learn in order to teach my children best. I do lots of research and I have spent years deconstructing my faith and my life to get to the heart of religion – LOVE.

How I Teach Religion

Faith

It’s hard to teach religion if I don’t understand it.

It’s been a rough faith journey and I’m now realizing it’s a never-ending walk. I’m coming full circle.

I didn’t grow up in church or with any real understanding of Christianity.

I said a prayer before dinner and at bedtime and that was about it.

Learning to live a life of faith is important for me to model for my children.

I had to learn what faith meant to me by trial and error, reading lots and lots and lots, and watching what not to do.

Faith is not what some people think it is. Their human dream is a delusion. Because they observe that faith is not followed by good works or a better life, they fall into error, even though they speak and hear much about faith. “Faith is not enough,” they say, “You must do good works, you must be pious to be saved.” They think that, when you hear the gospel, you start working, creating by your own strength a thankful heart which says, “I believe.” That is what they think true faith is. But, because this is a human idea, a dream, the heart never learns anything from it, so it does nothing and reform doesn’t come from this `faith,’ either.

Instead, faith is God’s work in us, that changes us and gives new birth from God. (John 1:13). It kills the Old Adam and makes us completely different people. It changes our hearts, our spirits, our thoughts and all our powers. It brings the Holy Spirit with it. Yes, it is a living, creative, active and powerful thing, this faith. Faith cannot help doing good works constantly. It doesn’t stop to ask if good works ought to be done, but before anyone asks, it already has done them and continues to do them without ceasing. Anyone who does not do good works in this manner is an unbeliever. He stumbles around and looks for faith and good works, even though he does not know what faith or good works are. Yet he gossips and chatters about faith and good works with many words.

Faith is a living, bold trust in God’s grace, so certain of God’s favor that it would risk death a thousand times trusting in it. Such confidence and knowledge of God’s grace makes you happy, joyful and bold in your relationship to God and all creatures. The Holy Spirit makes this happen through faith. Because of it, you freely, willingly and joyfully do good to everyone, serve everyone, suffer all kinds of things, love and praise the God who has shown you such grace. Thus, it is just as impossible to separate faith and works as it is to separate heat and light from fire! Therefore, watch out for your own false ideas and guard against good-for-nothing gossips, who think they’re smart enough to define faith and works, but really are the greatest of fools. Ask God to work faith in you, or you will remain forever without faith, no matter what you wish, say or can do.

Martin Luther

Do we do all this alone?

  1. Sola scriptura (“by Scripture alone”)
  2. Sola fide (“by faith alone”)
  3. Sola gratia (“by grace alone”)
  4. Solus Christus or Solo Christo (“Christ alone” or “through Christ alone”)
  5. Soli Deo gloria (“glory to God alone”)

While this oversimplifies the purpose of faith, I also worry about individualism in place of community.

Doctrine

I’ve taught Sunday school and Wednesday night classes to adults and children. I’ve taught parenting classes, Bible classes, financial classes, health classes.

I’ve been criticized for sarcasm, jokes, my appearance, photography, crafts, storybook read alouds, and more.

Not many of you should become teachers, because we know that we teachers will be judged more strictly.

James 3:1

I’m tired of being told I’m a sinner, evil, bad, wrong.

I’m tired of being told what I can and can’t read, watch, eat, do, wear.

I’m not caught up in rules or legalism.

The older and wiser I get, the fewer rules I find important.

We know that all things work together for the good of those who love God, who are called according to his purpose.

Romans 8:28

I have no patience for discrimination or exclusion.

I’m not interested in a vanilla church that looks like a private country club and has worthless social events.

I don’t want our family members separated out at the door of a church building to go to age-segregated classrooms to learn about complementarianism.

It’s not my job to be the Holy Spirit to my family.

I don’t believe that my kids can’t doubt or ask hard questions about God, Jesus, the Bible.

I don’t believe in stressing out on the American idea of Heaven and Hell.

Jesus died on a cross to show us what love looks like in action.

Nearly half of young LGBT people who are left homeless after coming out are from religious backgrounds.

That’s according to research by the Albert Kennedy Trust (AKT), which supports young people who are at risk of homelessness.

The charity says three in four LGBT people are rejected by their families – and 45% of that number are from a faith background.

Nomia Iqbal and Josh Parry, BBC

We stopped going to church for many reasons. I have yet to find a church that is not complicit in racism and sexism, even if they are actively engaged in social justice and trying hard. I’m not interested in an American nationalist capitalist Jesus.

Being complicit only requires a muted response in the face of injustice or uncritical support of the status quo.

Jemar Tisby

I enjoy reading to my family and learning and growing in our faith together. We read lots about church fathers, saints, missionaries, poetry, nature…God is everywhere.

History

I feel it’s important to understand church history and the history of all world religions.

I love comparing and contrasting religions around the world.

I find history fascinating and I love learning how parallel and similar world religions are.

We learn a great deal about the origins of religions during our Ancient History studies every few years.

We enjoyed learning about and visiting churches in Europe.

We learn the Old Testament stories like the literature, myths, and legends they are.

We read about missionaries and discuss what they did wrong and right about evangelizing and helping people.

I enjoy exploring the music traditions, celebrations, and unique customs of religions.

Practice

Adhering to our faith, expanding our knowledge, and learning history isn’t enough.

We have to put into practice what we believe.

Acts of love, mercy, and grace are important.

Charity work and volunteering are difficult with young kids when most organizations want only adults.

What good is it, dear brothers and sisters, if you say you have faith but don’t show it by your actions? Can that kind of faith save anyone? Suppose you see a brother or sister who has no food or clothing, and you say, “Good-bye and have a good day; stay warm and eat well”—but then you don’t give that person any food or clothing. What good does that do? So you see, faith by itself isn’t enough. Unless it produces good deeds, it is dead and useless. Now someone may argue, “Some people have faith; others have good deeds.” But I say, “How can you show me your faith if you don’t have good deeds? I will show you my faith by my good deeds.” You say you have faith, for you believe that there is one God. Good for you! Even the demons believe this, and they tremble in terror. How foolish! Can’t you see that faith without good deeds is useless? Don’t you remember that our ancestor Abraham was shown to be right with God by his actions when he offered his son Isaac on the altar? You see, his faith and his actions worked together. His actions made his faith complete. And so it happened just as the Scriptures say: “Abraham believed God, and God counted him as righteous because of his faith.” He was even called the friend of God. So you see, we are shown to be right with God by what we do, not by faith alone.

James 2:14-24

I believe in “Kingdom come on Earth as it is in Heaven.”

We are the church and we are the hands and feet of God.

We need to show Heaven to the People.

We are the Kingdom of God. It is at hand. Reach out for it!

Inclusive Reading list:

World Faith

Christianity, Buddhism, Islam, Hinduism, and Judaism are the main world religions. There are lots of variations within them and other smaller faiths and beliefs throughout the world.

Panentheism: the belief or doctrine that God is greater than the universe and includes and interpenetrates it.

I teach my kids the history and customs of other faiths and traditions. I want them to understand and not fear others who are different. We are delighted by some of the customs in their simplicity, complexity, and beauty.

We see things on media that incite fear and otherness and I won’t allow that to dictate our views. We discuss it and refute it.

Love wins.

Resources:

How do you teach religion to your children?

Linking up: Grammy’s Grid,

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How I Pray

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I didn’t grow up in a praying household.

Religion was ridiculed and people of faith were considered weak.

It’s taken me 20+ years to consider faith and it’s been a rocky journey at best.

I don’t pray as regularly as I should, nor about the right things all the time. I’m selfish and sinful and mean and hateful and hypocritical and judgy. As are we all.

Prayer guilt haunts me with that ongoing uncomfortable, knowing feeling that I really shouldn’t be in ministry because mature saints would pray more than I do, and with much more fervor; prayer laced with Puritanesque, Princetonian, seminary vocabulary, and Biblical theology would be good too.

Pete Alwinson

I won’t pray for you the trite “happiness and health” because those things aren’t guaranteed, nor are they the most important.

I’m disgusted by the misuse of offering “thoughts and prayers” for tragedies, as if it helps anyone. Sometimes, silence is better.

I think prayer is more for Us than for God or the Universe or Others.

When you pray, don’t be like hypocrites. They love to pray standing in the synagogues and on the street corners so that people will see them. I assure you, that’s the only reward they’ll get. But when you pray, go to your room, shut the door, and pray to your Father who is present in that secret place. Your Father who sees what you do in secret will reward you. When you pray, don’t pour out a flood of empty words, as the Gentiles do. They think that by saying many words they’ll be heard. Don’t be like them, because your Father knows what you need before you ask.

Matthew 6:5-8

We learn about ourselves when we pray. We discover our values, needs, desires, wants.

Our eyes only see basic shapes and colors. Our minds perceive what we see. In seeing love in the face of others is to see God. To pray for others is to embrace God.

I think there are many different kinds of prayer.

Types of prayer:

  1. Communion (All day, all the time)
  2. Supplication (Lifting up your needs)
  3. Dedication, Sanctification, and Consecration (Ceremony  for service)
  4. Praise (Joyful recounting of all God has done for us)
  5. Worship (Losing self in the adoration of God)
  6. Intercession (On behalf of others)
  7. Spiritual Warfare — Two types: Dealing with yourself (Your mind is the battlefield and Repentance and Forgiveness) and Dealing with Others (Putting on the Full Armor and Binding & Loosing)
  8. Agreement (Corporate Prayer)
  9. Watch & Pray (Continual State of Awareness as a Watchman on the Wall)
  10. Thanksgiving (Count your Blessings; name them one by one)

How I Pray

I grew up thinking that prayer was all about coveting, thanksgiving, and praise.

I memorized little prayers before meals and at bedtime, but it didn’t really mean anything.

I believe prayer is a constant conversation.

It can be long, wordless, or simply an exclamation.

I often express thanks or exasperation or request assistance. I never feel as if I am alone in my endeavours. Sometimes, I want reassurance that Someone else witnessed this or that along with me.

Prayer is then not just a formula of words, or a series of desires springing up in the heart – it is the orientation of our whole body, mind, and spirit to God in silence, attention, and adoration. All good meditative prayer is a conversion of our entire self to God.

Thomas Merton

Prayer as a Discipline

Liturgy of the Hours 

The arrangement of the Liturgy of the Hours as described by Saint Benedict:

  • Matins (during the night, at about 2 a.m.) also called Vigil and perhaps composed of two or three Nocturns
  • Lauds or Dawn Prayer (at dawn about 5 a.m. or earlier in summer and later in winter)
  • Prime or Early Morning Prayer (First Hour = approximately 6 a.m.)
  • Terce or Mid-Morning Prayer (Third Hour = approximately 9 a.m.)
  • Sext or Midday Prayer (Sixth Hour = approximately 12 noon)
  • None or Mid-Afternoon Prayer (Ninth Hour = approximately 3 p.m.)
  • Vespers or Evening Prayer (“at the lighting of the lamps” about 6 p.m.)
  • Compline or Night Prayer (before retiring about 7 p.m.)

Daily Examen

The Daily Examen that St. Ignatius practiced:

1. Become aware of God’s presence.
2. Review the day with gratitude.
3. Pay attention to your emotions.
4. Choose one feature of the day and pray from it.
5. Look toward tomorrow.

Contemplative Prayer

While contemplation is a train of thought about something, meditation is training the mind to rest in a particular focus that leads to a connection to the source of consciousness itself.

Contemplative prayer follows Christian meditation and is the highest form of prayer which aims to achieve a close spiritual union with God. Both Eastern and Western Christian teachings have emphasized the use of meditative prayers as an element in increasing one’s knowledge of Christ.

 Augustine spoke of seven stages:

  1. the first three are merely natural preliminary stages, corresponding to the vegetative, sensitive and rational levels of human life;
  2. the fourth stage is that of virtue or purification;
  3. the fifth is that of the tranquillity attained by control of the passions;
  4. the sixth is entrance into the divine light (the illuminative stage);
  5. the seventh is the indwelling or unitive stage that is truly mystical contemplation.

Saint Teresa of Avila described four degrees or stages of mystical union:

  1. incomplete mystical union, or the prayer of quiet or supernatural recollection, when the action of God is not strong enough to prevent distractions, and the imagination still retains a certain liberty;
  2. full or semi-ecstatic union, when the strength of the divine action keeps the person fully occupied but the senses continue to act, so that by making an effort, the person can cease from prayer;
  3. ecstatic union, or ecstasy, when communications with the external world are severed or nearly so, and one can no longer at will move from that state; and
  4. transforming or deifying union, or spiritual marriage (properly) of the soul with God.

Contemplative prayer in my opinion is nothing else than a close sharing between friends; it means taking time frequently to be alone with him who we know loves us.’ Contemplative prayer seeks him “whom my soul loves.” It is Jesus, and in him, the Father. We seek him, because to desire him is always the beginning of love, and we seek him in that pure faith which causes us to be born of him and to live in him. In this inner prayer we can still meditate, but our attention is fixed on the Lord himself.

St. Teresa of Avila

Stages of contemplative prayer by Dionysius the Pseudo-Areopagite:

  • Katharsis (purification)
  • Contemplation/theoria (illumination), also called “natural” or “acquired contemplation”
  • Unity (theosis), also called “infused” or “higher contemplation”; indwelling in God; vision of God; deification; union with God

My prayer for my children:

I pray for you LESS.

Self.

Stuff.

Negativity.

I pray you are GENEROUS.

With

Your time.

Your money.

Your love.

your joy.

I pray you TRUST.

even when others hurt you.

when you’re scared.

when you feel lost and alone.

I pray you are SEEN.

for what you do.

for how you love.

for who you are.

and try to see others for who they really are.

I pray you feel LOVED.

despite the cruelty and coldness of this world.

even when no one expresses gratitude.

FAIL spectacularly.

and get up again, and again, and again.

Learn from your failures.

The highest form of prayer is to stand silently in awe of God.

St. Isaac the Syrian.

I really like this Mystic Prayers page.

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Celebrating St. Stephen

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When we visited Rome over Christmas, we prepared ourselves for everything to be closed early on Christmas Eve, all day Christmas Day, and all day on St. Stephen’s Day. It was a little stressful since we were staying in an apartment and worried about having enough to do and eat on those few days. We knew we couldn’t pop down to the local big box store or off to a chain restaurant for a meal. There weren’t any and nothing was open.

We didn’t have leftovers from our takeout to make anything traditional for the day.

The traditional food would be St. Stephen’s Day stew made up of turkey, ham or bacon, vegetables, and other leftovers served hot. Cakes and pies would be served for dessert.

It’s traditional for people to visit the nativity scenes inside local churches and make a small donation. It was a sunny day and we enjoyed walking and looking at the sites along with locals.

San Lorenzo fuori le Mura is about 1.5 hours away on foot, so we never did get to see that part of Rome.

Celebrating St. Stephen

Stephen was a deacon in the early church at Jerusalem who upset the Jewish leaders with his teachings. Accused of blasphemy at his trial, he made a long speech denouncing the Jewish authorities who were sitting in judgment on him and was then stoned to death. His martyrdom was witnessed by Saul of Tarsus, a Pharisee who would later become a follower of Jesus and known as Paul the Apostle.

In Western Churches around the world, St. Stephen’s Day is celebrated on December 26, the day after Christmas. In Eastern Orthodox Churches where the Julian calendar is used, St. Stephen’s Day is celebrated on December 27th. St. Stephen was the first Christian martyr who died around the year of 34 A.D.

St. Stephen is the patron saint of stonemasons, casket makers, sufferers of headaches, horses and deacons.

Read the interesting account in the Bible in Acts 6-8:1. Stephen’s speech about Jewish history is interesting and objectionable by many as anti-Semitic. He changed from “our ancestors” to “your ancestors” at the end before he is stoned.

Yesterday we celebrated the temporal birth of our Eternal King; today we celebrate the triumphant passion of His soldier. For yesterday our King, clothed in the garb of our flesh and coming from the palace of the virginal womb, deigned to visit the world; today the soldier, leaving the tent of the body, has gone to heaven in triumph. The one, while preserving the majesty of the everlasting God, putting on the servile girdle of flesh, entered into the field of this world ready for the fray. The other, laying aside the perishable garment of the body, ascended to the palace of heaven to reign eternally. The One descended, veiled in flesh; the other ascended, crowned with blood.

The latter ascended while the Jews were stoning him because the former descended while the angels were rejoicing. “Glory to God in the highest,” sang the exulting angels yesterday; today rejoicing, they received Stephen into their company. Yesterday the Lord came forth from the womb of the Virgin; today the soldier of Christ has passed from the prison of the flesh.

Yesterday Christ was wrapped in swathing bands for our sake; today Stephen is clothed by Him in the robe of immortality. Yesterday the narrow confines of the crib held the Infant Christ; today the immensity of heaven has received the triumphant Stephen. The Lord descended alone that He might raise up many; our King has humbled Himself that He might exalt His soldiers. It is necessary for us, nevertheless, brethren, to acknowledge with what arms Stephen was girded and able to overcome the cruelty of the Jews that thus he merited so happily to triumph.

Stephen, therefore, that he might merit to obtain the crown his name signifies, had as his weapon charity, and by means of that he was completely victorious. Because of love for God, he did not flee the raging Jews: because of his love of neighbor he interceded for those stoning him. Because of love he convinced the erring of their errors, that they might be corrected; because of love, he prayed for those stoning him that they might not be punished. Supported by the strength of charity, he overcame Saul, who was so cruelly raging against him; and him whom he had as a persecutor on earth, he deserved to have as a companion in heaven.

St. Fulgentius, Third Sermon on St. Stephen

Countries around the world list St. Stephen’s Day as an official public holiday including Austria, Slovakia, Germany, Canada, Finland, Poland, Italy, Ireland, England, Australia, Czech Republic, Croatia, the region of Catalonia, and many others. Often, people of these countries will celebrate the holiday by spending time with close family and friends, and having meals together.

In Finland, in addition to spending time with family and friends, St. Stephen’s Day is celebrated with sleigh rides or horse rides, as St. Stephen was known as the patron saint of horses. These rides generally take place in small towns and rural areas.

One of the oldest folk-songs of Sweden, Saint Stephen was Riding (Staffansvisa) is sung at Christmastide in honor of St. Stephen, telling the delightful “Miracle of the Cock.” According to this story, Herod would not believe Stephen when he was told that “One greater than thou has been born this holy night.” The proof of his words came when a roasted cock rose up out of the gravy and crowed as he had crowed at the break of day.

The Staffan of the song has the features of two entirely different personalities, those of the deacon, St. Stephen of Jerusalem, whose feast is celebrated on December 26 and therefore closely connected with Christmas, and those of the eleventh century missionary, Staffan, who traveled far in the north. The latter was killed by pagans; and an unbroken foal brought his body to Norrala, where a chapel was built over his grave. In all Germanic lands he became the patron of health and of horses, and being confused with St. Stephen of Jerusalem he shares in his honors on December 26, such as the “Stephen-Cup,” drunk to good health, and horseback rides around churches and through villages.

In Ireland, St. Stephen’s Day is known as the Day of the Wren. This day is an official holiday of Ireland. The Irish name is called Lá Fhéile Stiofán (Boxing Day) or Lá an Dreoilin (Wren Day). The Wren’s Day celebration began hundreds and hundreds of years ago. One explanation for Wren Day was that St. Stephen was in hiding from his enemies. Unfortunately, he was hiding near a wren. The wren’s chirping gave away St. Stephen’s hiding place and he was found. The wren, therefore, was to be captured and stoned to death, just as St. Stephen was stoned to death. Today, musicians travel from house to house in search of the wren. As they visit each house, they receive money, food or drink as they sing the wren song. This is just one version of the wren song found in an old Irish tale:

The wren, the wren, the king of all birds,
On St. Stephenses day he was caught in the furze;
Although he’s small, his family’s great,
So pray, good ladies, give us a trate.”

Catalonia is another region which celebrates St. Stephen’s Day. In this region, a festive luncheon is served with cannelloni stuffed with escudella i carn d’olla (leftover turkey meat from Christmas day dinner).

St. Stephen’s Day is also called Boxing Day. Boxing Day pertains to filling boxes with gifts to give to others. Countries which celebrate Boxing Day include UK, Australia, Canada, Wales, and other Commonwealth communities. This day is a national holiday in many of these countries.

The old English carol Good King Wenceslas tells how King Wenceslas went out on St. Stephen’s day to bring charity to the poor. The snow was covered with the blood of his freezing feet:

Heat was in the very sod which the saint had printed.

With St. Stephen as our teacher, we learn quickly that as Christ came to us on Christmas Day so we must follow in the footsteps of the holy martyrs in our way to God. Psalm 62, used on the feast of St. Stephen, is a first lesson to teach:

O God, Thou art my God: earnestly do I seek Thee, My soul thirsts for Thee, my flesh longs for Thee, like a dry and thirsty land, without water. So do I gaze upon Thee in the sanctuary, to see Thy might and Thy glory. . . .

Antiphon: My soul cleaves to Thee, because my flesh was stoned for Thee, my God.

Lauds for the feast of St. Stephen, 3rd Psalm and Antiphon

Prayer: Lord Jesus, you chose Stephen as the first deacon and martyr of your One, Holy, Catholic and Apostolic Church. The heroic witness of his holy life and death reveals your continued presence among us. Through following the example of his living faith, and by his intercession, empower us by your Holy Spirit to live as witnesses to the faith in this New Missionary Age. No matter what our state in life, career or vocation, help us to proclaim, in both word and in deed, the fullness of the Gospel to a world which is waiting to be born anew in Jesus Christ. Pour out upon your whole Church, the same Holy Spirit which animated St Stephen, Martyr, to be faithful to the end, which is a beginning of life eternal in the communion of the Trinity.

Scripture: Acts 6:8-7:60

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Celebrating Winter Solstice

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The winter solstice which falls on or around December 21, marks an important milestone. It’s the shortest day of the year and the longest night of the year, signaling a powerful transition point between seasons.

“Solstice” comes from two Latin words: sol meaning “sun” and sistere meaning “to stand still” because it appeared as though the sun and moon had stopped moving across the sky.

Other names are “midwinter,” the “extreme of winter,” or the “shortest day.”

The birth of Jesus at the solstice is symbolic of the birth of the spiritual sun within, that we are not separate from our Creator, as we have been conditioned to believe to feel that we are less than divine.

Many visit Stonehenge in UK and Newgrange in Ireland for Solstice festivals.

Saint Thomas

St. Thomas is known for his doubts, and for demanding physical proof of the wounds of Christ’s Crucifixion. He was the first person to explicitly acknowledge the divinity of Jesus.

St. Thomas died on December 21, 72, in Mylapore, India.

This was traditionally the feast of St. Thomas the Apostle; his feast is now celebrated on July 3rd. 

St. Thomas day, St. Thomas gray,
The longest night and shortest day.

In Tyrol and in parts of Canada, this was considered “pie day,” with meat pies baked for the family, then cooled and frozen. The pies are saved for the feast of the Epiphany, and are thawed, reheated, and eaten.

In England, this was a day of charity, when the poor women went a “Thomasing” or begging. Wheat was cooked and distributed for the poor.

A seven-day celebration culminates every year on December 21, when many Christians in Guatemala observe Saint Thomas’ Day in honor of Thomas the Apostle.

Celebrate doubts, questions, concerns. Discuss with family, friends, or a prayer group.

A lovely lesson from Kennedy Adventures.

Blue Christmas

It’s natural and normal to feel a little down this time of year.

Many of us feel the loss of loved ones more poignantly during the holidays. Some struggle with all the hustle and bustle and commercialism. Mental illness becomes sharper with all the holiday expectations.

There are many quiet and dimmed “Blue Christmas” services and meetings for those who are depressed, lonely, traumatized, or just want something different than the joyful and bright holiday events.

The winter solstice represents the seasonal “dark night of the soul.”

We are a reflection of the universe that surrounds us. What takes place outside of us, must also take place within us.

The Dark Night of the Soul (from Spanish) by Saint John of the Cross

Once in the dark of night,
Inflamed with love and yearning, I arose
(O coming of delight!)
And went, as no one knows,
When all my house lay long in deep repose

All in the dark went right,
Down secret steps, disguised in other clothes,
(O coming of delight!)
In dark when no one knows,
When all my house lay long in deep repose.

And in the luck of night
In secret places where no other spied
I went without my sight
Without a light to guide
Except the heart that lit me from inside.

It guided me and shone
Surer than noonday sunlight over me,
And led me to the one
Whom only I could see
Deep in a place where only we could be.

O guiding dark of night!
O dark of night more darling than the dawn!
O night that can unite
A lover and loved one,
Lover and loved one moved in unison.

And on my flowering breast
Which I had kept for him and him alone
He slept as I caressed
And loved him for my own,
Breathing an air from redolent cedars blown.

And from the castle wall
The wind came down to winnow through his hair
Bidding his fingers fall,
Searing my throat with air
And all my senses were suspended there.

I stayed there to forget.
There on my lover, face to face, I lay.
All ended, and I let
My cares all fall away
Forgotten in the lilies on that day.

Sing the carol: “In the Bleak Midwinter.”

Music: “Cranham,” Gustav Theodore Holst, 1906. Words: Christina Georgina Rossetti, 1872.

In the bleak midwinter, frosty wind made moan,
Earth stood hard as iron, water like a stone;
Snow had fallen, snow on snow, snow on snow,
In the bleak midwinter, long ago.

Our God, Heaven cannot hold Him, nor earth sustain;
Heaven and earth shall flee away when He comes to reign.
In the bleak midwinter a stable place sufficed
The Lord God Almighty, Jesus Christ.

Enough for Him, whom cherubim, worship night and day,
Breastful of milk, and a mangerful of hay;
Enough for Him, whom angels fall before,
The ox and ass and camel which adore.

Angels and archangels may have gathered there,
Cherubim and seraphim thronged the air;
But His mother only, in her maiden bliss,
Worshipped the beloved with a kiss.

What can I give Him, poor as I am?
If I were a shepherd, I would bring a lamb;
If I were a Wise Man, I would do my part;
Yet what I can I give Him: give my heart.

Celebrate the Light

In the Northern Hemisphere, the winter solstice marks the shortest day of the year. It will probably be dark outside by 4 PM, which can feel a little depressing. It’s no surprise for many cultures, taking advantage of the light is so important on this day.

The seaside city of Brighton in the UK has an annual Burning of Clocks festival. People wear costumes representing clocks and the passage of time carry lanterns made of wood and paper to the beach, where the lanterns are burned in a huge bonfire, symbolizing the wishes, hopes, and fears that will be passed into the flames.

In the town of Penzance, people wear carnival costumes, “guisers” parade with lanterns, creating a “river of fire” meant to celebrate the return of the sun. 

Try to get outside while it’s still light out to connect with nature.

Take a walk, go for a hike, bundle up and enjoy your coffee, tea, or cocoa while sitting outside for a little bit.

We like to drive around and look at light displays.

Once the sun goes down, turn off all the electric lights and spend a moment or the rest of the evening in darkness.

After you’ve honored the sun’s light, light some candles with loved ones. It’s a great night for Hygge.

Bonfires are common on this night to chase away the darkness. Oak logs are traditional at Yule feasts.

Cleanse, purge, donate, and volunteer. Helping others is an ancient solstice custom, and is not just limited to modern Muslim, Jewish, and Christian religious members.

Watch all through the night. Attend a prayer service or watch the stars and sky. Contemplate and meditate. Welcome back the light of dawn.

Reflect and think about how you might recreate yourself in the new year.

Renewal. Write down things you want to let go of, then toss the paper into the fire as a symbol of release.

Bell ringing is traditional. Attend a bell choir concert or sing Jingle Bells with bells and tambourines.

The orange is a symbol of the return of the sun. Make orange pomanders to celebrate the solstice and decorate and freshen the home for the holidays. Lots of amazing citrus sales this week in stores! Now you know why.

Make sun ornaments.

Make “snowball cookies” – fun, easy treats like Danish wedding cookies.

Decorate with evergreens, berries, and natural elements.

Read books about the solstice.

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Celebrating St. Barbara

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St. Barbara is a 3rd century saint whose story is a mix of reality and legend. 

She is the patron saint of armourers, artillerymen, architects, mathematicians, and miners. St. Barbara is one of the Fourteen Holy Helpers, venerated because their intercession is believed to be particularly effective against diseases. Barbara is often invoked against thunder, lightning, and fire, and all accidents arising from explosions of gunpowder.

We saw statues and little altars for St. Barbara in a German gemstone mine we visited!

Saint Barbara in a gemstone mine

Barbara’s Story

Barbara, the daughter of a rich Pagan named Dioscorus, was carefully guarded by her father who kept her locked up in a tower in order to preserve her from the outside world.

Barbara secretly became a Christian and dedicated her life to knowing the true God and making Him known to others. She chose a life of consecrated virginity. She rejected all offers of marriage.

Dioscorus allowed for Barbara to leave her tower, hoping some freedom would change her attitude. Barbara used this opportunity to meet other Christians. They taught her about the Lord Jesus, the Holy Trinity and the Church. A priest from Alexandria, disguised as a merchant, baptized Barbara into Christ and His Church.

Her father had a private bath-house built for her. The original architectural plans were for two windows to be built, but, while her father was away, Barbara advised the workers to make a third window to symbolize the Trinity.

Barbara’s bathhouse became a place full of healing power and many miracles occurred there. St. Simeon Metaphrastes even compared it to the stream of Jordan.

After Dioscorus returned, Barbara informed him she had become a Christian and would never marry. Full of rage, her father grabbed his sword and went to strike her. Before he could do so, Barbara ran off.

Her father chased after her, but was abruptly stopped when a hill blocked his way. The hill opened and hid Barbara within a crevice. Dioscorus searched and searched for his daughter, but could not find her.

Dioscorus came across two shepherds and asked them if they had seen her. The first denied, but the second betrayed Barbara. Some legends indicate that he was turned to stone and his flock was turned into locusts.

Her father took her to the provincial prefect, who ordered her to be tortured and beheaded. Dioscorus himself performed the execution and, upon his return home, was struck by lightning and reduced to ashes.

She eventually met her end via martyrdom on December 4, 267 AD.

Her symbols are flowers and breads.

Celebrations around the world

To celebrate St. Barbara’s Day, known as “Eid il-Burbara,” Christians in Jordan, Syria, and Lebanon prepare and share a dessert made from boiled wheat, rose water, cinnamon, anise and nuts. This aromatic sweet represents the wheat fields where St. Barbara hid from her father, who kept her locked in a tower because she had converted to Christianity in A.D. 235. Middle Eastern Christians believe that, before her death, St. Barbara escaped her tower prison, and freshly planted wheat fields miraculously rose up around her, concealing her path.

St. Barbara’s feast marks the beginning of the Christmas decorating season for Lebanese Christians. Lebanese families also plant wheat grains, lentils, chickpeas and other legumes with the idea that in three weeks, the sprouts will be plentiful, accenting the Nativity scene under the Christmas tree.

Some believers take cherry branches into their homes Dec. 4. If the “Barbara branch” blooms on Christmas, it is considered to bring good fortune. This custom recalls the prophesy in the Old Testament book of Isaiah: The Messiah will spring from the root of Jesse. Christians expectantly await Jesus Christ during Advent, and he will blossom or be born at Christmas.

From this tradition comes “Barbarazweig,” the German and Austrian custom of taking branches into the house Dec. 4, with hopes of a bloom on Christmas. In Central Europe, it is believed that the blooming branch signals a promise of marriage in the year ahead.

Families in the Provence region of France germinate wheat on beds of wet cotton in three separate saucers, keeping them moist throughout Advent. When the contents of the three saucers — which symbolize the three persons of the Trinity — are green, they are used to decorate the creche, usually placed under the Christmas tree.

Celebrating St. Barbara

Forced paperwhite bulbs are often displayed the first week of December. It’s hard to find cherry blossoms, so silk sprays can be displayed.

Sprout grains. Cook with grains or bake breads.

St. Barbara’s feast day is an awesome opportunity to break out some fireworks! As the patron of firework manufacturers, families can remember St. Barbara by having a fun with fireworks or firework-related entertainment like sparklers and noise makers.

We like to celebrate the rhythms of the year and slow down during the holiday season.

A lovely lesson from Kennedy Adventures.

The Honorable Order of Saint Barbara recognizes those individuals who have demonstrated the highest standards of integrity and moral character; displayed an outstanding degree of professional competence; served the United States Army or Marine Corps Field Artillery with selflessness; and contributed to the promotion of the Field Artillery in ways that stand out in the eyes of the recipient’s seniors, subordinates and peers alike. 

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Celebrating All Saints’ Day

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Halloween and All Saints’ Day come at the natural new year, a time when traditionally the harvest is complete, and signs of winter begin to appear. In many religions, this is a holy time when it is believed that the veil between the worlds of the living and the dead is very thin and fragile.

Many of us don’t even know our family lines well enough to tell the stories, remember the memories, and pass on a legacy. Maybe it’s something we begin for better stability?

All Saints’ Day on November 1, is an opportunity to honor all saintly people and to look forward to the upcoming festivals – Martinmas on November 11, and Saint Nicholas on December 6th.

November 2, All Souls’ Day, is an opportunity to remember family members and friends who have passed. People remember, tell stories, and pray to those who passed on to ask for blessings.  Food is shared and sometimes left out overnight for the visiting spirits.

History

In the early years of the Christian faith, there was a consistent effort to eradicate pagan practices and to replace these with Christian festivals. The Roman Catholic church changed the Celtic Samhain festival and the Roman Feast of the Lamures and renamed them “All Hallows’ Eve,” in an attempt to turn peoples’ thinking away from a focus on the fright of death and ghosts and towards the many saints advocating for Christians in the Kingdom of Heaven. All Saints’ Day was established as the first of November with All Hallows’ Eve replacing the festival of Samhain. All Saints’ Day was probably first started by Pope Boniface IV, who consecrated the Pantheon at Rome to the Virgin Mary and all the Martyrs on May 13, 609 AD.

In the Catholic Church, All Saints’ Day is a “holy day of obligation.” Attendance at mass is a requirement on these days. All Saints’ Day is also commemorated by members of the Eastern Orthodox Church as well as some protestant churches, such as Lutheran and Anglican churches.

All Souls’ Day was established in the early fifth century with a similar intention. This day is not a holy day of obligation. The more sanctified remembering of those who have died help new Christians relate to the departed in a less frightening, or less pagan way.

Ideas for Celebration:

  • Learn about El Día de los Muertos/The Day of the Dead. This is a lovely site with timelines, history, traditions, and recipes.
  • Put out photos of loved ones who have passed away. Tell stories about their lives.
  • Share a harvest meal with friends and family.
  • Light candles inside and outside – in jack o’ lanterns or votive holder or pretty decorative autumn globes.
  • Plant flower bulbs in remembrance and in promise of spring!
  • Kids Party Games
  • Activities for Kids
  • Kids Party Ideas
  • Watch or read Coco.
  • Printables from Shower of Roses
  • Boots and Hooves Activities
  • A Slice of Smith Life
  • Attend church services. Or do these prayer services at home.
  • Visit a memorial in your city.
  • Visit a cemetery. Bonus if there are famous people or family members or passed friends.
  • Go on a history walk in your town. Our town offers ghost walks about town founders and important people.
  • Go to a thin place and feel the Spirit. Pray and thank Her for the past year and the future year.

It is certainly a good idea around Halloween to help little ones think loving thoughts about our beloved ancestors. To remember them and think of them watching over us with interest and affection can help us all feel protected in this time of year as the days of light turn to the days of darkness.

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