Jennifer Lambert

A Sacred Balance

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Challenging or Overwhelming?

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With so many curriculum options out there and the rigors of a classical education, how do I know how much is too much or too little?

A nudge is not a push; it’s an invitation.

A spirited, unruly student is preferable. It’s much easier to direct passion than to try and inspire it.

Joan Desmond

I certainly don’t want to overwhelm my kids, but I do want to challenge them.

  • How do I maintain balance?
  • How do I promote a love for learning?
  • How do I make our school time fun and engaging?
  • How do I get through those more difficult or disliked subjects?
  • How do I know when I need to make changes – to our schedule, curriculum, or level?

While I still struggle with many of these issues…having an almost 17-year-old, an 11-year-old, a 10-year-old, and a 7-year-old boy makes me think I at least have gotten this far and I may know a little bit.

We certainly struggled in the beginning. We tried many different workbooks, curricula, even styles, before getting comfortable and somewhat settled. While I can’t even touch on all the issues that homeschool moms face, I can tell you what worked for us. It may work for you or guide you to evaluate and prioritize.

Start with the basics. Bible study, reading, writing, maths. Some seasons, this is all you need. Having the freedom and blessing to homeschool is enough. The kids learn so much about relationships and faith from being protected from the world. When they’re little, focus on manners, courtesy, and habits.

To borrow a little tidbit from Charlotte Mason …

“The well-brought-up child has always been a child carefully trained in good habits.” (Vol. 2, p. 174)

Find a history and science the whole family can do together. If you have two or more children, you will want to do this. Trust me. (We use Apologia sciences and Story of the World history and Tapestry of Grace.) There are options for every budget. We only do history and science a couple days a week until they’re 10 or so.

Determine which extras are important, interesting, within budget, or necessary. These vary from family to family. We study Latin. We have a soccer star, a runner, and a piano player so far. We desire to limit our time outside the house. We eat dinner together every night. Yes, even church events get in the way of family time sometimes. And we purposely do not participate in many church programs because they often undermine what we believe.

When our homeschool is out of balance, my kids tell me with misbehavior, whining, laziness, or tears. Instead of disciplining them for being overwhelmed, I must step back and reevaluate our priorities.

…Do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord. (Ephesians 6:4)

We are blessed to school year round and we can take time off to focus on a unit we really love or to review a fun product. So I don’t stress the schedule much. Now, if we lived in a state where I’d have to keep attendance and turn in lesson plans and stuff, I’d have problems getting that organized! But I did that when I taught public school, so I’d work out something.

So, how do I stay focused and evaluate our success?

  • Pray. Do Bible study as a family and teach your kids to do their own studies separately as soon as they are able. Even the littlest ones can have a Bible basket for quiet times. Pray for peace, balance, humility, patience, and contentment. Pray for direction and needs! Pray for your budget.
  • Reread The Well-Trained Mind every year. At least hit the highlights to help you remember what you’re doing and why, especially if you have a child changing levels.
  • Don’t attend a homeschool co-op if they take away from family and school time or your personal values. Do attend a co-op if they reinforce what you’re already doing. Don’t feel pressured. Do what’s right for your family and take a year off of co-op if necessary. Don’t feel guilty if that’s what you need to do. We do not attend a co-op.
  • Guard yourself against naysayers. I know it’s hard if they are family members. Pray for grace and understanding and for their hearts to be open. This is your family and your decision or calling.
  • Protect yourself against comparison. That homeschool blogger or family down the street, across town, at co-op, at convention, wherever…they’re not you. Their children are different from yours. Their marriage is different from yours. Their issues are different from yours. Their financial situation is different from yours. Their children learn differently from yours. And you don’t know the behind-the-scenes stuff. You don’t know their medical history, their debt problems, their therapy bills, or any of the highs and lows of their past and present. You only see what they allow you to see. Just be awesome you.
  • Find a schedule that works for you. I know homeschoolers who school at night, on weekends, only 3 days a week, take Wednesdays off…whatever works for your family!
  • Make a list. Keep to a budget. Ask your spouse to help make or guide decisions about curricula and activities.

Don’t be a hoarder or a collector. I am slowly purging all the workbooks, unit studies, manipulatives, and reference materials that I thought we’d someday use. My oldest is almost seventeen and my youngest is seven, but I realize now that less is more. If I haven’t used it by now, chances are we never will.

I had this fairy tale vision of Jane Austen governesses and girls in pastel dresses lying on the grass reading, reciting, and discussing. That dreamy Charlotte Mason model is just that – a dream. I could no more recreate that scene than I could stop a stampede of wild horses. My kids are themselves. They are individuals. They are rambunctious, precocious, sarcastic, and wonderful. I am raising them to be leaders, not mice. But I want them to be challenged just right. And that takes constant tweaking and evaluation to determine when to move on, when to skip something, or when to practice more.

I’m sure other teaching methods can be overwhelming, but I think classical homeschoolers want to do it all, learn it all, not miss anything. We often want to recreate that educational model of the past with its great rigors. I know I teach some subjects and topics very thoroughly because I didn’t learn it well in public school and I feel it’s of great value. And we can do all that – with balance and love – when the child is ready. There’s no need to push a three-year-old to read or a thirteen-year-old to write a research paper that’s university-worthy.

Work with your kids, not against them. They’re not the enemy. And we have all the time in the world.

For we are not fighting against flesh-and-blood enemies, but against evil rulers and authorities of the unseen world, against mighty powers in this dark world, and against evil spirits in the heavenly places. (Ephesians 6:12)

Allow God to lead you. Monitor your children’s frustration levels and behavior. Ask your husband for guidance, even if he isn’t involved in the homeschool. He still notices moods.

Do you also struggle with exasperating your children?

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Transitioning in Classical Education

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How do you know when your child is ready to transition from grammar to dialectic to rhetoric?

There are many guides out there in the classical education world with recommendations based on age or grade level, but it is really up to the parent/teacher to determine when the child is ready.

What are signs of readiness?

When a child is ready to move on from grammar to dialectic/logic, I look for her to begin making connections and asking lots of questions. The age/grade levels are a guide only. My daughter began making connections earlier than the recommendations. I didn’t want to hold her back with a too-low reading level or have her get bored with further memorizing. We moved on in our curriculum to the “dialectic level.” We still often read the grammar books with the younger siblings because they’re awesome. We continued with memorizing new material. We continued with history timelines. Some things don’t change.

The reading lists on Ambleside Online are a great guide. They are challenging. If they’re too easy, then you need to look to move up to keep the child interested. The key is to challenge without frustration. We don’t want to overwhelm; we just want to challenge. They don’t necessarily coincide to grade levels.

It concerns me to read articles citing that some children shouldn’t expect to even move on to the rhetoric level (can’t find the reference, but I remember reading this recently). I feel it’s my duty to get my children to that level where they can eventually surpass the master and self-teach.

Rhetoric is Socratic dialogue and critical thinking about what is learned. (Dictionary definition: “The art of speaking and writing effectively.”) I think this is one area in which our schools are sorely lacking–as is most of society! The idea of “can’t” permeates our mindsets. If no one else (or very few) achieves it, then it must be impossible or improbable. Our curriculum rhetoric level is advanced high school and even college level reading and work

How does your child learn best?

The descriptions of different learning styles really helps me adapt my teaching of different lessons and subjects to each of my children while not expecting fish to climb trees.

“Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid.” ~ Albert Einstein

Parents should know their children best and monitor challenges to observe when it’s best to move into the next learning level. I love this about homeschooling. I learn along with my children and I know them intimately: what their interests are, what they love and dislike, where their passions lie. I know what frustrates them. I can reteach a concept that’s difficult or we can all help learn together. We can move on when we’re ready. We can skip pages (gasp!). We can do 2nd grade math and 4th grade reading or mix it up however it works best for us.

The three foundations of a classical education:

Grammar Level {Grammar overview}

Dialectic Level {Dialectic or Logicoverview}

Rhetoric Level {Rhetoric overview}

“The direction in which education starts a man will determine his future life.” ~ Plato

When I began teaching my eldest, I had no idea what I was doing.

All options were wide open to me. I had taught public middle and high school students, and college courses. What was I supposed to do with a bright five-year-old? And that whole October birthday thing just threw us off schedule! That first year was difficult.

I started with The Well-Trained Mind (TWTM). I’m not sure how I discovered it, but it must have just been an internet search. I think it appealed to me that it was an education such as I would have desired to have (and aha – there’s The Well-Educated Mind – for others like me!).

We had no real friends who homeschooled. No mentors. We had just moved from Georgia to Texas, thanks to the Air Force. I couldn’t find a teaching job, and her birthday was too late for her to begin kindergarten, even in a private school. God closed every door to direct us to home educate our children.

I loved the curriculum options for all subjects from 1st-12th that are laid out in The Well-Trained Mind (TWTM). Yay for choices! But I had set in my mind that my daughter should be in kindergarten. She was only just 5 in October! Yet I knew in my heart that she was well beyond what kindergartners did all day. (She would have been a trouble-maker in school, that one.)

So I began with an old math workbook and a set of readers from my husband’s mother. She had taught kindergarten and second grade for 32 years! I let Liz set the pace. We sat at the kitchen table for “school” every morning.

My child completed all the “kindergarten” work I had for her in ONE MONTH. Now what?!

Since she already knew how to read fluently, I bought the first volume of The Story of the World and we went. to. town. We read through that and loved the notebooking and the narrating and the doing of fun projects. I loved the combining of history and literature – it seemed gloriously fun to do these unit studies.

We read through First Language Lessons (when it was levels 1 and 2 in one book!) and that was highly enjoyable for both of us. The English teacher inside me just ate it up! She loved the copywork and handwriting exercises. She is highly developed in language. We’ve never formally studied grammar or spelling after that. She now gets all her grammar education from her Latin programs.

I followed TWTM that first few years religiously. I had no other guidance. It was safe.

For the most part, she did really well and everything was fine with TWTM module.

Then she hit those upper elementary years. Tragedy!

The Story of the World just didn’t cut it for her that second time around. You’re supposed to cycle through those 4 volumes of history 4 times, digging deeper in each cycle, but we dug pretty deep on the first go-round.

Thus began the search for something more in-depth.

We dabbled in Charlotte Mason lessons for a year, but we needed more structure. I was in survival mode with another move across the continent and a new baby!

We now use Tapestry of Grace for our main curriculum. It encompasses history and literature, with all the necessary components, such as geography and writing. It divides the curriculum into four levels of classical education: lower and upper grammar, dialectic (logic), and rhetoric. {Story of the World is a core text during the upper grammar level.} We cannot express how much we love it. Our library is very well utilized and our bookshelves are overflowing. We use notebooking every week for the history and literature assignments. We like some of the craft projects and the fine arts program. It is well worth the price, especially to be able to use it for multiple children throughout the years. Some weeks, we have a family read-aloud, but mostly, the kids have different reading selections all on the same theme. I love how well it suits us!

For my two middle kids, First Language Lessons was just ok. I’m not sure if it’s me or them or a combination of us all, but we didn’t enjoy it nearly as much as I did with my eldest. They do love the poems and letter writing activities, but perhaps the grammar memorization was too much for them. Part of this may be that we need to get to reading fluency before studying parts of speech thoroughly. Much of it may just be different personalities and abilities. I didn’t use it at all with my son.

And the point to classical education is for the child to go at the pace at which his or her mind develops. It’s a cognitive progression. I have no need to rush my middle kids and no need to compare them to where my eldest was at their age. Age doesn’t matter with classical education. And I’ve never been a stickler for “what grade they’re in.” I don’t have to fit them into those boxes. Thank God.

While my eldest is extremely interested in every aspect of history, my second child is not. My third child likes only some of it. One balks at copywork, and the others love it. My second is fascinated by math; my eldest is not. #3 and my eldest are both linguistically gifted, reading early and desiring to learn foreign languages. My second struggles a bit with reading since she is so right-brained! I constantly re-evaluate my methods and try not to compare the children to each other.  I can tell my son will probably be very verbal and I breathe a sigh of relief for my boy to love books in addition to being a very kinesthetic learner. And all my children are very musical (whereas I am not).

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The Summer of Slammed Doors

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2005.

That crazy whirlwind of a summer.

It actually began with Aaron’s deployment being canceled upon the sudden passing of his father. That was the catalyst to change my life forever and always.

Since there was no position available for Aaron at his current base, they pushed up his PCS. I had to quit my job teaching college English and prepare to move from Georgia to Texas immediately.

The day the movers arrived, I discovered I was pregnant with Victoria.

When we arrived in Texas in late June, I could not find any position in education anywhere in the city of San Antonio. Because I wasn’t fluent in Spanish.

As fall approached, we realized we had to make some hard, quick decisions.

We couldn’t afford to place Elizabeth in day care or private school if I couldn’t work. Her October birthday held her back from beginning kindergarten at the public school.

I knew I would have Victoria in the spring and it would interfere with work if I found a job.

I’d like to say we prayed through this, but we didn’t really discuss our decisions with God. He did do a great job of slamming all doors so we would listen, though.

We decided I would stay home for a year or two and keep Elizabeth home with me and teach her. The plan was that she would eventually attend school after the primary grades. Then we could all go back to “normal.”

Aaron’s family thought we were crazy. Both his parents, both his sisters, and one brother-in-law were all public school teachers. They didn’t like the idea of homeschooling at all.

We submitted to having Liz tested by one of their teacher friends. Liz tested very high on everything, over third grade in reading at only age five.

They were satisfied.

As I taught Liz at home that first year of homeschooling, I realized she was getting smarter, more independent, and more creative. The gap between her and other school children her age was widening instead of narrowing. I knew it would be much more difficult for her to reintegrate into a school environment.

I realize that all those changes that summer, while at the time totally stressing us out, were molding us into the family God wanted us to be. He knew best what we needed and where we needed to be and what we should be doing. Over the years, we have learned that we cannot rely on others – family or friends – but that only leaning on God for our guidance brings us success.

My husband and I grew up in a time when the only homeschool families we knew were rather strange, and we certainly didn’t want that stigma. I didn’t grow up in a Christian home so the Über fundamentalist homeschoolers I met didn’t appeal to me. Many homeschoolers I met those first few years helped me to set goals of what I didn’t want for my family. It was a whole new world, and I felt really prepared on the academic side since I had teacher training and a love for learning. But I was not prepared for the homemaking and parenting shift of being home all day, every day with two – and then three! – little girls. I fought God and my husband tooth and nail for my selfish needs. It was a difficult time for our family while God changed our hearts. It was a tough journey experimenting with curriculum choices, co-ops, and homeschool groups and finally gaining confidence in my teaching abilities and God’s direction for our homeschool.

What began as a one-year experiment simply because I was home with two, then three, young daughters turned into a never-look-back lifestyle. It’s been over ten years, and now we have four little lambs and have homeschooled in four states, plus Germany!

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New to Homeschooling?

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When I began homeschooling almost thirteen years ago, it was solely for academic reasons. I’ve tried all sorts of methods and curricula over the years, and I’ve come full circle: back to the same academics.

Lots of curricula out there is faith-based, and we’ve gotten to the realization that most of it is dumbed down, biased, white-washed, Euro-centric…kind of the opposite of public school curricula with its absence of any religious doctrine, but still with bias. We use lots of book lists to study history and science. We want the truth, not some watered-down, evangelical, conservative view of the truth.

I have some different perspectives and priorities than other homeschoolers, for sure.

I have a bachelor’s degree in English literature (w o r t h l e s s). I have a master’s in education, specializing in teaching English grades 6-12. I earned an endorsement in gifted education and I was a school coordinator for the gifted program. Did you know “gifted” students fall under the special education umbrella? I was an educator in the public and private sector for almost ten years. I taught middle school, high school, and college. I had ESOL, gifted, advanced, and regular ed students. I taught literature, grammar, reading, and writing. I substitute taught, worked in after-school programs, and tutored students who scored low on standardized tests. I’ve worked as a private English tutor to high school students.

So, there’s that personal history. I was an “actual” teacher. I know the other side.

I hated the textbooks for their white-washed short stories, bland poetry, excerpts of novels, grammar drills, writing exercises, and busy work. I hated assigning homework and grades for meaningless assignments. I hated the politics of school.

Homeschool parents don’t have to have college degrees in education (or anything) to teach their children well.

I realize how daunting a task it can be to teach our own. Thank God my husband is a whiz in algebra, chemistry, and physics, because I’m not. But kids can and will learn on their own, despite us! Often, we should just get out of the way.

As a homeschool mom, I don’t recreate a school environment. I don’t waste time. I don’t give grades, tests, busy work, or projects. In our home, learning is a natural process, based on interests. We try not to suck all the joy out of it.

People think I know some stuff since I have a daughter finishing up her homeschool academics, taking the SAT, graduating, taking college courses, and taking off into the world.

I try really hard not to impose my beliefs on others. We have our reasons for homeschooling. We are staunch advocates for learning at home. We are anti-school. I don’t believe school is necessary at all. Home is base and everything else is just supplementary. I don’t even like co-ops or enrolling my kids in classes.

I realize many families homeschool their kids for different reasons, with different styles, sometimes temporarily or for just a season, and maybe one child attends school while another in the household stay home.  I may not understand some of this, but to each her own.

To New Homeschoolers:

You don’t need a script.

You don’t need to re-create school at home.

You don’t have to be driven by fear.

Don’t overdo it.

You don’t have to use Christian curricula. Or the same texts as a public or private school.

You can change your curricula anytime, for any reason.

You don’t even need a curriculum, actually.

You don’t need a DVD or online program.

You don’t need a chore chart.

You don’t have to join a co-op.

You don’t have to get up early and “do school” before lunch. You can learn anytime!

You don’t have to use schoolish words like “recess” or “class” or “seatwork.”

You don’t have to spend a lot of money.

You don’t need a classroom.

How We Homeschool

We don’t have a schedule.

We don’t do testing.

We don’t do grades.

We don’t participate in a co-op or many group activities at all.

Reading, writing, and discussion usually take about an hour each day. The rest of the time, the kids learn what and how they like.

We don’t worry about screen time.

We don’t use checklists, charts, agendas, calendars, etc.

We don’t use punishments or rewards systems of any kind.

We don’t overschedule our lives.

We stay home most of the time.

We have lots of free time to think, explore, read, play, cook, create, or do whatever we desire.

We’re more about the process than the outcome.

I respect my kids. I trust my kids.

Children can make their own decisions. Children can teach themselves.

Children know themselves best – their preferences, tastes, likes, and dislikes.

I’m a guide, a coach, a mentor.

It’s not my job to teach every lesson or provide everything for my kids. Most of my own learning happened after I became an adult. Learning is a lifetime activity.

I love to introduce my kids to new things – new foods, art, experiences, movies, books. If they love it, great. I try not to get my feelings hurt if they don’t care for something I love. Usually, my enthusiasm is enough to get them to at least try something new. It’s my role to introduce and I am proud I have enough knowledge and experience to give them so many choices and expose them to so many new things. I am constantly learning and researching and seeking new things to show them. I love it.

My Top 5 for Successful Homeschooling

  1. Focus

    Many homeschool families have a central focus, and everything else revolves around that. For us, it’s the humanities. For some, it’s gymnastics or ice skating or math or science. Find your focus, and go after it.

  2. Relationships

    Family relationships are the most important aspect of homeschooling. If you don’t set a stage for successful home relations, homeschooling will be miserable. Sure, there are times when someone is irritable or needs alone time, but we help each other, work well together, and respect each other. We enjoy being together, even the teens! Connection and relationship is the most important aspect of parenting and homeschooling.

  3. Life Skills

    Everyone needs to learn the basics – basic finances, car maintenance, cooking, cleaning, clothes mending, appliance fixing, yard work, household management and maintenance. It’s super important. Team up with others to learn these if you don’t know it yourself!

  4. Experiences

    Sure, you can learn lots from books or videos, but experiences are more memorable. We always try to find an experience to represent what we learn about – field trips, museums, road trips, travel, activities, hands-on.

  5. Foundation

    Most of us realize the importance of a good academic foundation. The 3 R’s – Reading, wRiting, and aRithmetic. Also, a good moral foundation – religion, faith, social justice, or whatever personal concept is important to your family. Academics are actually secondary for us.

Our Favorite Homeschool Resources

THE LIBRARY! We go every week and gets lots and lots and lots of books on every subject that looks interesting!

Why we love Notebooking!

See my parenting book list.

View my favorite books for parenting, marriage, and more.

Resources:

What is your focus for homeschooling?

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Favorite Fall Books

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Fall is a magical time of year.

We feel a nip in the air in the mornings and after the sun drops behind the trees. Leaves start to shed their green hue and show off their real selves.

It’s back to school time. It’s apple picking season.

Pumpkin everything is suddenly everywhere. We do a pumpkin theme in October.

Autumn is a second spring when every leaf is a flower. ~Albert Camus

Our list of favorite fall books.

We read these selections every September. Leaves, apples, scarecrows.

Leaf Man by Lois Ehlert

Fall has come, the wind is gusting, and Leaf Man is on the move. Is he drifting east, over the marsh and ducks and geese? Or is he heading west, above the orchards, prairie meadows, and spotted cows? No one’s quite sure, but this much is certain: A Leaf Man’s got to go where the wind blows.

With illustrations made from actual fall leaves and die-cut pages on every spread that reveal gorgeous landscape vistas, here is a playful, whimsical, and evocative book that celebrates the natural world and the rich imaginative life of children.

Red Leaf, Yellow Leaf by Lois Ehlert

Watercolor collage and pieces of actual seeds, fabric, wire, and roots in this innovative and rich introduction to the life of a tree. A special glossary explains how roots absorb nutrients, what photosynthesis is, how sap circulates, and other facts about trees.

The Apple Pie Tree by Zoe Hall

We have a special tree in our yard–an apple pie tree!
Colorful collage illustrations follow each season as an apple tree grows leaves, fragrant blossoms, and tiny green apples. Soon the fruit is big, red, and ready to be picked. It’s time to make an apple pie! Here is a celebration of apples and how things grow–sure to delight young readers all year long.

Fletcher and the Falling Leaves by Julia Rawlinson

As the leaves fall from his favorite tree, Fletcher worries that something is terribly wrong. But then winter comes, and with it a wonderful surprise.

The Seasons of Arnold’s Apple Tree by Gail Gibbons

Arnold collects apple blossoms in spring, builds a tree house in summer, makes apple pie and cider in the fall, and hangs strings of popcorn and berries for the birds in winter, among other seasonal activities. Includes a recipe for apple pie and a description of how an apple cider press works.

The Little Yellow Leaf by Carin Berger

As all the other leaves float off and fly past, Little Yellow Leaf thinks, I’m not ready yet.

As the seasons change all around, Little Yellow Leaf holds on to the tree. Still not ready.

Will Little Yellow Leaf ever be ready?

Leaves by David Ezra Stein

Bear is surprised when the leaves start falling off the trees, but when he tries to reattach them, it doesn’t work. Eventually, he gets sleepy, and burrows into the fallen leaves for a long nap. When he wakes up, it’s spring-and there are suddenly brand-new leaves all around, seeming to welcome him.

The Apple Pie that Papa Baked by Lauren Thompson

These are the apples, juicy and red,
that went in the pie,
warm and sweet,
that Papa baked…
for guess who!

Fall Mixed Up by Bob Raczka

Fall is all mixed up in this silly book! Can you find his mistakes in the words and pictures?

Autumnblings: Poems and Paintings by Douglas Florian

This collection of poems and paintings welcomes fall with all the crisp energy of a joyful tumbling run.

Johnny Appleseed by Reeve Lindbergh

Rhymed text and illustrations relate the life of John Chapman, whose distribution of apple seeds and trees across the Midwest made him a legend and left a legacy still enjoyed today.

Johnny Appleseed: The Legend and the Truth by Jane Yolen

Everyone knows the legend of Johnny Appleseed, the man from Massachusetts who planted apple trees all the way to California. But the true story of Johnny Appleseed, or John Chapman, is even greater than the legend.

The Scarecrow’s Dance by Jane Yolen

We’re introduced to the fickle scarecrow, who decides to leave his station and dance away the fall night. He leaps through the fields until he reaches the farmhouse, where he sees a small light in the window. Inside, a boy is saying his prayers, and he offers up a special prayer for the corn that will be harvested in the morning. Humbled, the scarecrow knows what he has to do: He returns to the field and watches over the corn as only he can.

Fall Walk by Virginia Brimhall Snow

Learn about autumn leaves through a lyrical tale with illustrations and activities
With beautiful illustrations and a lyrical narrative, Virginia Snow takes children on a fun and educational adventure. Take a stroll through the woods and learn to identify 24 different kinds of leaves by their shapes and autumn colors. At the end of the day, learn how to press the gathered leaves and how to make a leaf rubbing.

Scarecrow by Cynthia Rylant

They perch high above gardens and fields, with borrowed coats and button eyes and pie-pan hands that glint in the sun. What else is there to know about them? Perhaps more than we realize

The Scarecrow’s Hat by Ken Brown

A resourceful chicken seeks the help of her farm animal friends to solve a problem, while giving something of herself along the way. Chicken really admires Scarecrow’s hat. Scarecrow would gladly trade his hat for a walking stick to rest his tired arms. Chicken doesn’t have a walking stick to trade—but she knows someone who does. Thus begins her quest to find items to trade among her farm friends, all to obtain a walking stick to swap for Scarecrow’s hat. But why does Chicken want an old straw hat?

The Apple Cake by Nienke van Hichtum

An old lady wants to bake a cake. She has everything she needs except apples. So she sets off to market to buy some apples, taking a basket of plums to trade along the way, just in case…

Woody, Hazel, and Little Pip by Elsa Beskow

This delightful autumn story describes woodland scenes when two acorn children get carried away to adventures by the blustery autumn wind.

South by Patrick McDonnell

When a little bird awakens to find that all of his friends and family have gone south for the winter, it takes a surprising friendship with Mooch the cat to help him find his way. This is a wordless and profoundly moving story–by the creator of the beloved comic strip Mutts–that explores being lost and found, crossing boundaries, saying goodbye, and broadening horizons.

Ox-Cart Man by Donald Hall

Thus begins a lyrical journey through the days and weeks, the months, and the changing seasons in the life of one New Englander and his family. The oxcart man packs his goods – the wool from his sheep, the shawl his wife made, the mittens his daughter knitted, and the linen they wove. He packs the birch brooms his son carved, and even a bag of goose feathers from the barnyard geese.

He travels over hills, through valleys, by streams, past farms and villages. At Portsmouth Market he sells his goods, one by one – even his beloved ox. Then, with his pockets full of coins, he wanders through the market, buying provisions for his family, and returns to his home. And the cycle begins again.

The Sunflower Parable by Liz Curtis Higgs

The story of Logan, a young gardener who hopes to grow sunflowers that reach all the way to heaven by summer’s end. Side by side with his father, the wise farmer, Logan discovers the value of planting seeds, not only in the ground, but also in the hearts of his friends and neighbors.

See our FALL crafts, activities, and more! See our apple activities.

Do you have any favorite fall books not on my list?

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12 Things Homeschoolers Don’t Have to Do

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As I peruse social media, I always see lots of images and articles about school-related issues.

Since I homeschool our 4 kids and feel that school is not necessary at all, I thought about all the things we don’t have to do since the kids don’t attend school!

12 Things Homeschoolers Don’t Have to Do

  1. Get up Early

    I am so, so, so happy we don’t have to get up early to catch a bus or make it to school on time. If my kids went to school, there would be three different drop-offs: elementary, middle school, and high school! I can’t imagine the logistics. We can sleep in and do whatever we want in the mornings rather than inhaling a non-nutritious Pop-Tart and rushing to a school to sit all day and be brainwashed.

  2. Back to School

    I don’t have to worry about back to school lists. I can buy whatever supplies we need whenever we need them. We don’t have to buy uniforms or school clothes. While I do stock up on a few things during those BTS sales, like glue…we are not concerned with the stress of this time period. We school year-round. We can transition our curricula any time of year! We love to enjoy the end of summer and beginning of fall as natural transitions.

  3. School Picture Day

    Ah, the dreaded school pictures. I can remember when they were simple and it was expected that kids wore their Sunday best. But, those laser backgrounds? Maybe not the best choice. And my hair in 7th grade? I shudder. Now, it seems the picture companies are really into profits and the purchase packages are unbelievable. Who needs a pricey 16×24 stretched canvas or body pillow of their kid?

  4. Sit at a Desk all.day.long.

    We don’t sit around all day. I remember how exhausting it was to just sit all day long, under those fluorescent lights. We do what we want, when we want. We rush outside when it’s nice weather. We play games. We go to the library. We go hiking or on nature walks. We watch the birds. We garden. We read, watch Netflix, research. We have dance parties. We snuggle on the sofa for reading. We cook, clean, make arts and crafts. The girls love to knit and crochet and cross-stitch. We shoot a target in the backyard with a BB gun. We rarely sit at desks or tables. We don’t have to relinquish our creativity.

  5. Fundraisers

    How I hated selling cookie dough and wrapping paper. How I hate it when kids come to my house, hawking stuff I don’t want or need. How I hate the contests for kids and classes for pizza parties or a skate night or tickets to the water park. Maybe we should have a better system or allocate money where it’s needed better? If the school fundraiser sold whiskey, then maybe I’d consider buying.

  6. Teacher Appreciation Gifts

    I remember getting a few gifts when I taught school – the coffee mugs, stuffed animals, gift cards. Pinterest is full of creative and horrific teacher gifts. It’s obviously a competition to see who can outdo the other parents with the best or weirdest upcycled gift. Bribery much? Teachers just want more respect and fewer standardized tests. They really have a tough job. It’s a battle on all fronts.

  7. Follow a Schedule

    So much time is wasted at school on transition time. Line up to go to lunch. Line up to go to art, music, PE, library, computer lab. Line up for restroom and water break. We have no schedule, or at the least, a very rough schedule. We get up when we want. We eat when we’re hungry. We use the bathroom when the need arises. We go outside when we want. We play, read, create when we desire. Downtime is thinking time. We follow natural rhythms.

  8. Homework

    Homework is unnecessary. We complete lessons in only a few minutes. We don’t have to beat the dead horse with 40+ math problems unless they think math drills are fun. We don’t have to circle verbs in red and underline adjectives in blue in 20+ sentences ever. School kids attend classes 6+ hours every day and still have several hours of worthless homework? It’s ridiculous. We don’t do worksheets or extra work. We learn to mastery. We don’t even have to follow a curriculum! We can learn how we want!

  9. Grades

    We don’t do grades. We don’t do tests. We don’t encourage that kind of competition. It’s meaningless and creates such discontent. No one has ever asked me as an adult what I made in 11th grade algebra II or senior English or 3rd year Spanish. No one cares about my master’s Faulkner course. Extrinsic motivation doesn’t teach anything or ensure success. We learn for the sheer love of it.

  10. So Much Sickness

    A friend of mine had to send her special needs son to school because it’s German law. She complained that in the first month, he came home with diarrhea, Fifth’s disease, a cold, and more. He’d never been sick before. Schools are little breeding grounds for illness. Ew. I know teachers and students get sick so frequently, especially after summer and winter breaks. It’s not that we never get sick, but we seldom do. The kids play in the dirt, eat well, get plenty of rest, and have healthy immune systems.

  11. Keeping up with Fads

    My kids don’t even know what’s popular except when their public schoolteacher aunt asks if they’re into Rainbow Loom or something that her public-schooled children and students are into. My kids don’t care about popularity, fashion, fads, or anything like that. We’re not exposed to advertisements or competition with other kids.

  12. Rules

    My kids know how to stand in line. If they’re ever in a classroom environment, they know to raise their hand before speaking. They are polite and courteous. They don’t need arbitrary rules to control them, to make them behave or obey. We’ve encountered some strange rules at different organizations we’ve attended for music lessons or field trips. While I understand there is sometimes a need to protect others and property, it’s disheartening to see my homeschooled kids treated like criminals. Automatically guilty. Children are naturally empathetic and desire to please. Too many rules are just a setup rebellion.

    When rules and discipline are not evenly and fairly applied, students will believe that the system is rigged and unfair.

We appreciate the freedoms that homeschooling offers our family!

We homeschool so we can have freedoms that schools stifle.


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Learning to Let Go

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With a new year comes evaluation, changes, praise, regret, resolution.

Perhaps these are amplified for the homeschool mom. I sure feel the weight of responsibility on my shoulders constantly.

And even more so for the homeschool mom of a teenager.

Teens have a way of putting you in your place, don’t they?

We’ve spent the last few years tapering back, evaluating priorities, setting goals, discussing plans for success.

It’s time to simplify.

Several years ago, my daughter was fired from her piano lessons. Her teacher just called me and gave me no notice that lessons would not continue. Nice. Apparently, theory workbook hadn’t been completed in a month and practicing had been scarce to none. She needed to cut her client list and my daughter was at the top of that list. Ouch.

Way to feel inferior as a mom.

I should’ve been checking and encouraging, nagging about practicing and the homework, right?

But it’s not my piano lesson.

It’s her responsibility.

While reviewing curriculum for the blog is a blessing for our family, it also causes upheaval for a time to see if this or that is a good fit or is fun or works better than that other one. Often, changing mid stride is necessary if something doesn’t work. Sometimes it’s hard to make the call. Is it too difficult? Is the child just being stubborn? Does it not fit our learning or teaching style? I’ve struggled over the years with making changes and wasting time and money on curriculum that doesn’t work for us. But it’s also great to have the freedom to choose what works best for us. We seldom do reviews now and we’ve settled into a good routine.

Homeschooling and having my four children home with me all the time gives me a better glimpse into their needs, desires, personalities, preferences. I have a better idea of how to guide them since I’m with them all the time and see the dynamics of their interactions.

It’s my job to be proactive and recognize when their needs change and how I should adapt. It’s a constant dance of doubt and wonder. I read and research and pray that I’m not messing all this up too much.

As children grow up, relationships and responsibilities change.

I’m still set on mothering toddlers, young children, tweens…and suddenly, I’m stuck with this woman-girl and I’m at a loss as to what to do with her.

Me, who had no qualms as a high school English teacher, standing toe to toe with burly high school football players and telling them what for.

This girl with her flashing eyes undoes me.

I expect more from a 17-year-old than an 11-year-old than a 3-year-old. Yes, it sucks to not be able to play all the time.

Being a responsible citizen is sometimes tiresome and I would rather lie around and read novels than do dishes, laundry, or pay bills. It’s my job to be positive and proactive and teach my teen daughter these things are better done quickly and cheerfully. Work before play.

I must lead by example.

My attitude matters.

There are difficult years parenting teens when I doubted everything.

I’ve learned that my eldest daughter gets rather run down without one on one time with me. She needs to be away from her younger siblings to recharge once in a while. I need to be intentional about making this happen more. She’s very social but gets easily overwhelmed.

My middle girl needs lots of exercise and outside time to blow off steam and she gets very tired in the evenings, so we try to get book work finished early.

My youngest girl is a free spirit and it’s heartwarming to watch her explore and create.

My son is so compassionate and thoughtful of others and I pray that is never compromised by this cruel world.

It will be proactive to help our household be more stable too in any way I can. Despite moving every few years. Despite deployments. Despite illnesses. Despite the deaths of pets.

I’ve watched the kids blossom and grow and become so independent, but they still ask what I think, what should she do.

My eldest just began college and got a part-time job!

It’s a delicate balance, this granting little freedoms with open hands – while they still think that freedom is something I can grant them.

While wanting to clench the fingers into tight fists.

All the while, praying.

My eldest has an iron will. I know it will serve her well in the future, but it hurts so much sometimes.

Resources:

  • Jesus, the Gentle Parent: Gentle Christian Parenting by L.R. Knost 
  • Hold On to Your Kids: Why Parents Need to Matter More Than Peers by Gordon Neufeld and Gabor Maté  
  • Untangled: Guiding Teenage Girls Through the Seven Transitions into Adulthood by Lisa Damour, Ph.D. 
  • Hands Free Mama: A Guide to Putting Down the Phone, Burning the To-Do List, and Letting Go of Perfection to Grasp What Really Matters! by Rachel Macy Stafford  
  • Unconditional Parenting: Moving from Rewards and Punishments to Love and Reason by Alfie Kohn 
  • Free to Learn: Why Unleashing the Instinct to Play Will Make Our Children Happier, More Self-Reliant, and Better Students for Life by Peter Gray 
  • The Danish Way of Parenting: What the Happiest People in the World Know About Raising Confident, Capable Kids by Jessica Joelle Alexander  
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How an OB/GYN Can Help You

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A person who specializes in the medical fields of obstetrics and gynecology is often referred to as an OB/GYN. Are you a woman who is planning on giving birth to children at some point in your life?

If this is the case, it will be very important for you to seek out the services of a skilled OB/GYN to assist you during your pregnancy. There is a common misconception that all doctors who work in this profession are basically the same. After all, these people are taught the same things when they are attending medical school. You need to realize that some medical schools are much better than others. Some people have been a practicing OB/GYN for a longer period of time. Look around and explore the backgrounds of the various people who work in this profession in your area. The health of your baby will be better off because of the time you spend searching for the best OB/GYN for your needs.

Here are some examples of a few of the areas that an OB/GYN can specialize in.

1. Maternal-fetal medicine

This person will be able to help you if you have a pregnancy that is very high-risk. For example, you will go to see a maternal-fetal medicine specialist if you go into premature labor, you have a problem that prevents your blood from clotting properly, you have gestational diabetes or you have gestational or chronically high blood pressure. All of these problems require the treatment from a specialist. An OB/GYN who does not have extensive training in these areas will not be able to provide you with the help you need. Therefore, you should always make sure that the OB/GYN you make an appointment with has a background in the area you need help with. Dr. Max Izbicki became an OB/GYN because he loves to help people. Max Izbicki loves his job and is respected by his many patients and colleagues in the medical profession.

2. Reproductive endocrinology and infertility

In this case, the OB/GYN will be able to treat problems that involve a woman’s infertility. This person also has extensive knowledge of the hormones and glands that are in a woman’s endocrine system. A reproductive endocrinologist is a person you would make an appointment with if you and your partner have not been able to conceive a child. This person will have the necessary training to perform an embryo transfer, zygote intrafallopian transfer, gamete intrafallopian transfer or in vitro fertilization.

3. Gynecologic oncology

This doctor has chosen to focus on finding and eliminating various forms of cancer that are able to develop and grow inside a woman’s reproductive system. The vulva, ovaries, cervix and uterus are all areas where cancer can form.

4. Reproductive surgery and pelvic medicine

This type of OB/GYN has a surgical background. They can help women by repairing problems they are experiencing with their urinary tract. They also perform surgery on the connective tissue and muscle that is found below the pelvis. A number of things like getting older and pregnancy can cause a weakening of the pelvic floor. This person has the training to correct problems related to pelvic organ prolapse, overactive bladder, fecal or urinary incontinence, discomfort in the bladder and infections of the urinary tract.

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Kitchen Pantry Makeover

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I’m not typically crafty or DIY.

But this pantry needed a makeover.

I feel like our lives have a makeover every few years.

We move around a lot as a military family.

It’s kind of nice to start fresh.

You don’t even really want to see the “before picture” of this pantry.

And that’s good, because I don’t even have one!

It was once white, I’m sure, but the wooden shelves were scuffed and the walls were stained. And it smelled bad.

The owner updated all the floors, cabinets, walls, and trim, but left the closets as-is.

I didn’t want to look at those scuffed shelves.

It was a simple project to update this pantry and make it pretty.

We painted the inside walls and shelves white.

I wrapped sticky paper around the shelves for extra protection.

I already had all the jars, canisters, and baskets for my grains and sugars and nuts.

I have several kinds of flour on the bottom shelf. Brown sugar and white sugar and snacks are on the next shelf. Breakfast cereals, granola, and nuts are on the third shelf. Popcorn, seeds, and nuts are in the plastic baskets and my plain rice jar. Cornmeal and an empty canister are on the top shelf.

I love my new nifty jasmine rice storage container!

We also have a butler’s pantry across from our laundry room for all our kitchen appliances that we don’t use every day.

There’s a large pantry inside the laundry room with those terrible wire shelves where I store canned goods and other food items that moisture won’t bother.

We’re still in the process of stocking our pantry with staples after moving to Ohio from Germany. It’s nice to start fresh.

This kitchen is pretty amazing.

I have an amazing beverage station with little drawers for coffee and tea!

Here’s where I store my spices.

I love this Lazy Susan cabinet for my sauces!

We always pray before and during our PCSes. We pray for smooth travels. We pray for certain, specific things in a new rental house. We pray for kind neighbors. We pray for a healthy and welcoming church. We pray for friends for our children.

In the beginning of our journey, our prayers were vague. We know exactly what we want and need and how to pray for those things now.

God answers prayer!

This is the nicest house we’ve ever lived in!


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Our Curriculum for 2017-2018

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It seems like summer has flown by for us this year!

We moved from Germany to Ohio and spent lots of time getting settled and dealing with reverse culture shock.

We’re pretty relaxed and spend most mornings reading and completing the lessons so our afternoons are free to play, explore, create, bake, watch videos, or ride bikes.

I’m not worried about schedules or how long it takes to complete a book. Some days, we don’t get to math. We do science only a couple times a week. We read every day.

Our curriculum this year:

We still use Tapestry of Grace as our base. I like their book lists and activities. I print Notebooking Pages every week to coincide with our history and literature studies.

We don’t really label with grade levels, so here’s what my son will be working through so far this year. He’s 7 years old.

He also listens and participates in history and literature read-alouds with his sisters.

  • Christian Liberty Nature Reader
  • Life of Fred
  • Singapore Math 3
  • Spelling Workout A
  • Apologia Who is God?
  • Apologia Land Animals

My middle girls are 10 and 11 years old and here are their core texts.

  • The Story of the World
  • Elementary Greek
  • First Start French
  • Singapore Math 6
  • Spelling Workout G
  • Apologia General Science

My eldest daughter is almost 17 and will be attending a local university part-time for dual enrollment.

She’s looking for a part-time job too! It’s a bit discouraging how few jobs are available for a 16 yo and how potential employers talk to and treat her. She volunteered with the Red Cross for two years, but has no paid experience. And everything is online now, so she can’t charm anyone by walking in. There are no help wanted signs in windows anymore.

She is still finishing up French, year 3 history, and some literature. She has to review algebra and take a math entrance exam to enroll in college algebra spring semester.

The kids really work quite independently.

We do history and literature read alouds in the mornings, after breakfast.

The kids then work on their notebooking, Bible, vocabulary workbooks.

I assist Alex, which really just means I just watch him do his work. Every few days, I read a science chapter to Alex and he works through his science notebooking journal the other days.

I assist with and discuss science with the girls. Dad reviews science in the evenings and weekends and does some of the more extravagant experiments.

Dad does math with the girls in the evenings and weekends. We all like to listen to Life of Fred!

We’re usually finished with the bulk of school work by lunchtime.

Then the kids can read whatever they like, create art or crafts, play outside, rollerblade, scooter, ride bikes, wait for their public school friends to get home on the bus, play table games, iPads, Wii, watch Netflix, hike in the woods, bake something yummy, practice typing, research, nature journaling, or almost anything they want!

We take days off for field trips and other activities. Since we school year-round, we don’t stress. Evenso, we still often complete the year’s workbooks, journals, and other curricula by March!

What are you using this year?
What does your schedule look like?

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